Parsha Short Talks - Vayeitzei

Jacob is on his way to Haran after leaving Isaac and Rebecca, his parents. Along the way he fell asleep, and he has the famous dream of the ladder that goes from heaven to earth. Over the years, people have created various murals and paintings that depict angels ascending and descending the ladder in different locations around the world. During this dream, the LORD made many promises and assurances to Jacob. However, the last one is the most important.

“I am going to leave you until I bring you back here to the very spot where I am.” We can see in this writing that the people of Jacob’s time and until Jonah believed that the LORD only lived in the land of Israel. This assurance that the LORD gave to Jacob was that he would be successful in his travels to Haran.

The LORD is telling us the same thing today that he told Jacob. The statement and assurance that has sustained us through the difficult times is that the LORD will always see you back home because he is waiting for you.

If you are currently living in a difficult time, rest assured that the LORD knows it and will bring you to Him.

Jacob had to leave his family quickly because his brother Esau was trying to kill him because he felt Jacob stole the blessings from him. Midrash tells us he spent 14 years in the house of study, the yeshiva of Shem. Once that time was over, Jacob was on his own and was about to stay in the home of his uncle, Laban. His uncle had a reputation for deceitfulness, which earned him that name because Laban means charlatan.

Jacob had an interesting situation because his brother Esau was out to kill him, and his uncle Laban was not godly. Jacob had nowhere else to turn but to the Lord. One night under the stars, he dreamed of a ladder that ascended from earth to heaven. He saw angels ascending and descending on the latter. At that moment, Jacob pleaded with the Lord for food, shelter, and warmth.

Jacob knew that the world contained the commodities he needed to survive. He also knew that the greatest blessing is to use the gifts for their intended purposes. The LORD gave bread to eat and gave clothes to wear. All too often today, we find people use food and clothing for purposes that are not part of God's original intention. Sometimes they're just wasted, and other times they are used to make extravagant statements of wealth. Jacob at a proper perspective on his life and asked that everything conform to the perspective of his immediate needs.

A person can fulfill their needs through the commodities of life by putting them into their proper focus and purpose.                             

Jacob followed the directive of his mother, and he arrived in Haran. When he got there, he asked some shepherds if they knew where Laban lived. The shepherds said that they knew him. Then Jacob asked if Shalom (God’s peace) was with him. The answer was, “we know him.” Why didn’t the shepherds give Jacob the answer he was looking for? Laban was very deceitful in his business dealings with them.

The shepherds did not want to berate Laban therefore, the right thing to do was to be quiet about him. Rather than stating that nothing positive can be said about a person, it is preferable to remain silent about them.

In my business life, I learned that if someone asks me for a reference and I cannot say something positive about the person, I should refuse to give the reference. The same thing is happening here. The shepherds had nothing positive to say about Laban, so they took the correct route and basically said nothing. So, Jacob would make up his own mind to the character of Le Bon. It didn’t take long for Jacob to realize that Laban intended to swindle him more than once.

Jacob was on his way to Haran fleeing from his brother Esau. When he arrived there, he noticed that a group of shepherds had gathered around a well and they were idly sitting in the middle of the day. At the same time, Rachel was approaching the well with her herd, and Jacob met her. He fell deeply in love with her and eventually he would get to marry her.

Before Jacob met Rachel, he was wondering why the shepherds were just sitting around in the middle of the day. Instead of speculating about it, he asked them. The shepherds told Jacob that they were waiting for enough men to gather to roll a large stone from the top of the well in order to draw water for their animals.

Jacob then asked them where they came from. The reason he did that was he wanted to know whether they knew Laban.

The Sage Rashi said that Jacob was curious why the shepherds were not working. He was about to chastise them but before beginning his lecture he said the words, “where do you come from?” When speaking to someone you don’t know, you can get the conversation started quickly by asking them where they come from. Knowing where they grew up can give you a lot of information about the person.

When Jacob arrived in Haran, he saw a group of shepherds sitting around on the ground in the middle of the day doing nothing. He immediately concluded that they were lazy without even asking them what was going on. The shepherds explained to Jacob that they needed more men to move a heavy rock that was covering a well. They were sitting around waiting for help because they could not water their animals until the rock was moved.

Jacob’s complaint about them was unfounded, and he should not have critiqued them. Jacob got around this problem by calling them brothers, thus invoking brotherhood. Then, his comments to them were constructive instead of destructive. The lesson here is that before you criticize someone that you don’t know, it is best to find out why they’re doing what they’re doing. Also, you have to know who you’re talking to so you don’t want to upset someone who might perform some violence on you because you criticized them.

When I took my leadership training, they taught me that when you become the manager of a department, the first thing you should do is observe. You need to learn what people do, how they do it, and why they do it. After understanding all these things, then you can make changes. Do not criticize people for the way they do things until you ask them why they do it the way they do it.

Jacob’s first encounter with his future wife Rachel has some interesting notes in it. Jacob greeted her at a well and then helped to feed and water her sheep. Then Jacob kissed Rachel and burst into tears. Jacob told Rachel that he was his father’s brother. He also identified himself as the son of Rebecca. Upon hearing this, Rachel ran home to tell her father about this meeting. Jacob was a nephew of Lavonne since he was the son of Rebecca, who was Laban’s brother. (Note that in the JPS the word “kinsman” is used instead of brother.)

Jacob knew that to start his destiny in the confines of a hostile environment that he should proclaim the rules loudly and clearly. He wanted to avoid being swayed or duped by Le Bon. Jacob knew about Le Bon’s reputation. Jacob wanted to express that Rachel was the one he intended to marry and that he was ready to be tough if needed. In doing so, he sent a message of pride and awareness to his descendants.

When Jacob met Rachel, he wanted to assure her that her father would not victimize him. This assumes that Rachel knew that her father, Laban, was a charlatan. Jacob was his nephew. At first glance, you would think that Jacob’s uncle would not try to cheat him. However, as the story unfolds, we know that is not the case.

Later in the story, we discover Jacob uses trickery in the same way that Laban did it to him. So, what can we learn from the Jacob story? Is it all right to return trickery for trickery? Shouldn’t one rise above the deprived morals of another person?

Sometimes you must use evil to deal with evil. That sounds like a very difficult statement to swallow, but unfortunately, it’s true. Sometimes, being the nice guy, all the time makes you a doormat. If you must use evil to fight evil, ensure that evil will not become a part of you. When Jacob used his trickery to get the upper hand. He did not hurt Laban, instead he used it to get away from him.

 Jacob arrived at Laban’s house and identified himself as the son of Rebecca, Laban’s sister. And Laban offered his nephew Jacob work. Jacob wanted to marry Rachel, and he said that he would work for seven years for Rachel, Laban’s daughter, who was the youngest one. Why was the Torah so explicit in Jacob saying that Rachel was Laban’s daughter? The Sage Rashi said that Jacob was afraid that Laban could have said that Jacob was to work seven years for any Rachel that lived in the city. Rather, Jacob was very clear that he wanted to marry Laban’s daughter.

What we can learn from this story is that when a person makes a request, it needs to be clear, direct, and accurate. There should be no leeway for interpretation. Jacob left no room for misinterpretation that he wanted to marry Laban’s daughter Rachel. In Jacob's case, he was deceived into marrying Leah first. That happened because Jacob did not check to see which bride he was being given. So, after you make a clear and accurate request, ensure that you receive exactly what was agreed upon.

We know that when Jacob traveled to Haran; he met Rachel and decided he wanted to marry her. Rachel was the daughter of Laban, so Jacob asked him for her hand in marriage. He promised to allow Jacob to marry Rachel in exchange for seven years of work. However, Labon told his daughters otherwise, and it was Leah who first married Jacob. Rachel could have reacted with resentment and jealousy because she knew she was the one that Jacob wanted, but she helped her older sister, Leah, to get married. In a way, she was part of the collaboration that her father had set up to get Leah married first.

After Jacob had discovered the deception, he went to Laban and struck a deal after protesting that he could marry Rachel if he worked for another seven years. Rachel did not have any children at the beginning of the marriage, which upset her greatly. Her sister Leah had given birth to four children. Leah’s firstborn Ruben went into the fields and picked mandrake. He brought them to his mother. People believed mandrake helped with fertility. Rachel asked her sister for some mandrakes. Leah refused. For Rachel to get some of the flower she had to promise to send Jacob to be with Leah that night instead of her. Leah conceived that night and board Jacob of fifth son, who they named Issachar.

Where was Leah’s gratitude to Rachel? Leah did not appreciate the sacrifices her sister had made to help her marry the man she was promised to. Leah did what her father told her to do and selflessly met the family's needs. People remember her as Mama Rachel throughout history, while Leah is simply overlooked. There may have been times in your life where you knew doing the right thing would not help your situation.

I know a young lady who was shadowing a school counselor because she was about to get her degree in that area. There was an incident, and she believed the counselor was wrong and may have even broken the law. She went to her college instructor and told her about the incident. She did not worry what the consequences would be to her because she had high morals. The school counselor was immediately fired. The young lady was told the college could not help her find another shadowing opportunity. Unfortunately, that affected the young lady’s career. She did the right thing, even though it hurt her over the long run.

Every name of the 12 children of Jacob has a particular meaning. Some names trace back to particular events, while others trace back to personal characteristics of the person with that name. Jacob gave the name Judah to his fourth son. When Leah became pregnant with Judah, she said, “This time I will praise the Lord.” Therefore, she called him Judah. Judah means “I will praise the Lord.”

Imagine every time that Leah or Jacob called the name of their fourth child, they were repeating the words “praise God.” Each time they said his name, it expressed thanks to God, over and over again. In the centuries to come, countless people praised God. The Talmud tells us that no one praised God as much as Jacob and Leah did. How many of you may want to change your name to Judah?

Laban for 14 years and he had enough. Jacob knew that he just couldn’t leave Laban as if he was retiring from a job or even going to another job. He knew there would be no farewell party or even a counteroffer to stay. Jacob gathered his family and departed. Three days later, Laban was told that Jacob had left. Laban gathered his kinsman and pursued Jacob for seven days. Laban eventually overtook Jacob at Mount Gilead. The Lord appeared to Laban in a dream that night and said to him “guard yourself that you do not speak to Jacob either good and evil.”

Jacob learned by working for Laban that even the good that a crooked person speaks is only good for them. Jacob knew that no matter how appealing Laban’s offer might’ve sounded to return home, he had to consider the source. He then determined that it was not such a great deal. The old saying is the grass is not always greener on the other side. However, sometimes you have to take the risk because the grass you’re standing on is dying and may not recover. Always be wary of where you’re about to step.

Jacob had fled from his house by the advice of his mother. He traveled to her homeland and met her brother. Jacob had worked for Laban for 21 years. He acquired four wives and 12 sons. Every few weeks Laban would change Jacob’s wages, which became old after a while. Jacob agreed with Laban that any speckled or striped sheet that came out of the flock would be his. In one year, that’s exactly what happened.

Jacob decided to leave. He gathered his family and his flocks and left. Three days later, Laban discovered he was gone and chased after him. When Laban reached him, he said to Jacob, “it is in my power to do all you harm; but the God of your father addressed me last night, saying beware of speaking with Jacob, either good or bad.”

Laban’s philosophy declared that if it wasn’t for God, he would’ve done what he wanted to do. Laban did not kill Jacob because God said not to, a negative response. Our philosophy should be we want to do what God wants us to do, a positive response. We must understand that God will not ask us to do something that he has not already equipped us to do.

There are many times we read the Scripture that we don’t bring different Scripture together, which shows something God was looking for. For instance, the lawgiver Moses, was a shepherd for 40 years and he was a good one. Therefore, God knew Moses would be a good shepherd for his flock, the nation of Israel. David was tending to the sheep as a shepherd when Samuel called him in, and God told Samuel that David was to be the next king. David's selection was based on the care he gave to his flocks.

Then we come to the Jacob story, and we see he was a shepherd for 21 years working for his father-in-law Laban. During those 21 years, Jacob learned how to become the leader of what would become a great nation. Jacob had an arduous task. His mission was to raise 12 tribes and each of them would have their own unique path. Some of his sons would become merchants, while others would become scholars. One of his sons would become the royal line of Israel. Each of the tribes had a specific place in Israel’s history.

Sometimes, the Lord may ask you to do something, and you don't understand why you're being asked to do it. Perhaps it’s because the Lord wants to prepare you for something else that he wants you to do. Look at your past, are there classes you attended or jobs you had, and you always wondered why. You may hear the Lord calling out to you to use those skills that you thought might’ve been a waste of time.