Reflections

P.R.I.D.E. Reflections:

Reflect on the most encouraging words you can recall hearing growing up:

• What were they?

• What words you can recall hearing as an adult?

• What are some things we can do to encourage student?

Growing up, the encouragement I heard most often was how smart I am. At the time, this made me feel very special and proud of what I could do. As an adult, however, I feel there was a downside to this encouragement. Faced with a challenge, I would be told, “You can figure it out, you’re smart,” which did not actually provide much comfort for the frustration I felt or a plan on what to do. Instead I was left feeling like, if I were really smart I would already know the answer and wouldn’t have to work so hard. This expectation that I should be able to know what to do or what to say without any effort didn’t help me cultivate an attitude of perseverance or calmness in the face of obstacles, abilities I had to learn later on in life. Learning became more about my ego than my curiosity or desire to gain new knowledge and skills. In high school, when I felt uncertain and scared of the future, I heard the same refrain, that it would all work out because I was smart, I just had to apply myself. But I felt so lost I didn’t even know what that meant. Research into students’ mindsets has found that these fixed mindsets, viewing children as either smart, average, slow, etc., is detrimental to their success and achievement in the long run compared to growth mindsets that emphasize how the ability to learn depends upon effort. This is something I keep in mind in the classroom, being careful not to praise a student for being so smart or a genius when they show an aptitude for something, but instead highlighting when I see them persevere in a problem, or simply responding to their intrinsic joy in being good at something by putting it into words. 

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Think about the word, “Africa.” What five words come to mind when you think of Africa? 

Wild, large, origin, colonialism, diverse

Africa is not always portrayed in the best light from an American perspective. Growing up, it often appeared in media about needing foreign aid or charity, or it was a disconnected backdrop in nature documentaries about the most common wild animals: elephants, giraffes, lions, and more. In high school, there was a little teaching about the history of colonialism, and more focus on the slave trade, but this concentrated mainly on America, and less on humanizing the impacts of colonialism from an African perspective. Learning on my own about the various countries and peoples in Africa really brought to life the richness of culture and diversity in Africa beyond the impersonal framing of history classes attempting to be neutral and objective. 

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Recall a time when you or someone close to you encountered negative words. Share how it made you feel.

Growing up, I was often told how thin I am, and how I needed to eat more and 'get some weight on my bones,' mostly by family members. These were spoken out of concern, mostly, but made me feel uncomfortable. I wasn't trying to be skinny and did eat, it's just not something I thought about a lot. There's an underlying connection with masculinity here, that as I got older, felt more negative. When I started boxing, I was told I didn't look like a boxer, but more like a runner. I thought I saw myself bulking up, but was still told how thin I was and how I didn't look the part. I loved sports when I was little, and played as many as I could. But by the end of high school I didn't play any at all. This isn't all due to the comments about how I looked, but I think there's an underlying story here about the disconnection between the intention of others' words and their impact on me. I've never felt unhappy with my body--after all, our culture places an outsized emphasis on being thin--but I've also never been thrilled about it. I've never felt a great amount of self love. I've mostly felt slightly embarrassed and emasculated. I can only wonder how different things would be if I had explicitly been taught to love my unique body and led to understand the impact of different diets and engaged in an exploration of whether I ate enough in a way that empowered me rather than felt like a criticism or outward attempt to control me.

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How has your knowledge of the Diaspora grown over time, especially after this cohort session?

In what ways will you continue your learning about the diaspora to support the P.R.I.D.E. work you intend to implement in your classroom?

The majority of my understanding of the African diaspora in school came from lessons on the transatlantic slave trade, however, with the focus on US history, I did not realize how many more Africans were sent to South and Central America Relative to the United States. I developed a greater understanding outside of school on the role of colonialism in impacting Africa. This is something I want to continue learning about outside of P.R.I.D.E. It's a great challenge, I think, how much of this to teach in preschool. It feels important in order to explain the disparities that children can observe in the media and the world around them, but I struggle with breaking down such a complex topic. It is something I will continue through trial and error, seeking out additional continuing education trainings, and discussing with colleagues.