Acts of God

It was a gloomy autumn afternoon in the small eastern Idaho town. Leaves began to crumble from trees, the darkened clouds cast shadows across the schoolyard, and the crisp morning air warned of the upcoming winter. I was 8 years old, and had successfully survived 2 years at Taylor’s Crossing Public Charter School. Life had been swell and friendships had been made. But on this day, one of those friends moved away. This was a new situation for all of us. No one wanted to say goodbye, but he was scared most of all. And I can understand. It is horrifying to leave all you have ever known behind to enter a new, unknown realm.

It was his last recess, which gave us 20 minutes to say our goodbyes and well-wishes. While time was short, students quickly gathered to prepare their thoughts. He and his friends sat around the giant tire, which was in the corner of the school’s property, across the dying field, next to the fence where the horses lived, and far from adult supervision.

When it was my turn to say goodbye, my own clique approached his. But before we could arrive, one of his friends came up to us, looked me in the eye and said, “You can’t come over here if you don’t understand religion.”

My friend told me, “Don’t let him get to you, it doesn’t matter.”

Since I didn’t understand the extent of this remark at the time, my friends and I simply walked away. I never did get to say goodbye, and none of us ever spoke of the event again. And although the situation didn’t bother me at the time, it does now.

For the first 5 years of my schooling, I was the only one in my class who wasn’t Mormon. Through first grade, nobody seemed to care or even notice. I made friends like any other kid and everyone was equal. But as we grew, so did our differences. I soon questioned religion in its entirety. I was just fine without one, and the exclusiveness of going to church seemed to encourage their prejudice. So what was religion and why did people believe in it?

Reminded of this childhood event, I remember times through history in which religion has brought the worst in people. 923 years ago, 1.7 million innocent Muslims were killed. Shiny armor, expensive, sharpened, and bloody swords occupied the streets of Jerusalem because Pope Urban II was threatened by the Muslim faith. The Christian and Muslim religion contradicted the right to the Holy Land. The fear that Muslim ideology could overpower the Christians, led to religious intolerance, hatred, and massacre. Pope Urban promised that it would no longer be a sin to kill non-Christians. He guaranteed that by participating in the Crusades, all sins would be erased in the eyes of God, and the fighter would be cleared to heaven. The deal became appealing to thousands of Christians, peasant and knight alike. Uniting them across Europe, the first Crusade began. Murder, rape, and brutality towards thousands of innocent, unarmed Muslims in Jerusalem were “forgiven,” even encouraged, by the Christian empire. But after a series of 8 religious wars and Crusades, the Crusaders still had not taken over the middle-eastern land they desired.

While the Crusaders used their religious perspective to excuse violence against Muslims, many other places of the World experienced similar discriminatory conflict. The Nazis killed 6 million Jews, and about 3 million were killed during the French wars of religion. Thankfully, we seem to have finally learned the concept of religious tolerance. We no longer see wars or massacres due to our differences in religious views. Nowadays we live together in spite of our varying ideals. But, we do not live in harmony. We still disagree. We still exclude. And we continue to discriminate, making this Earth an imperfect world.

But while religion has given people the power to be close-minded, I have also seen its greatness. I have seen a friend lose both her parents in a tragic plane crash. Their family, a friend to my own, lost everything. It wasn’t resilience or strength that kept their three kids together. It was their faith, and their belief that they would make it through this difficult time. They had trust in their bible that someone was there to guide them and to help them through their pain. This principle got them through the hardest of times. Being united with their loved ones through prayer and song, they are reminded that they can survive even the most monumental of losses. That faith fuels their fight.

While I perceived religion as a clique throughout my childhood, I’ve come to understand that religion is so much more. It is a way for people to celebrate a sense of belonging and security. Regardless where you go to church or whatever way you were raised, anyone can feel the workings of a greater being. This being, let it be science, God, Yahweh, Allah. Let it be undefined, let it be polytheistic. Let it be nature and the earth, or let it be yourself. Whatever you choose to call it, no one can deny the presence of a greater force. Perhaps religion is not a way to control what people believe. Instead, faith acts to unify and protect.

I cannot say that religion can solve any problem. I cannot say that one religion is true, since there are too many beliefs out there. But in the end, It doesn’t matter who is right or wrong. Religion embraces the goodness inside us, more often than the bad. While religion has caused the violent disagreements through history, we cannot let these moments define religion. The small minority who have used religion for their own power cannot determine the effects of religion. The people in my life who have used their spirituality to keep them going prove that faith can saves lives. While I still do not “have” a religion, I know that everything happens for a reason. Whether it’s a powerful being above that's guiding me through life, or it’s my own human instincts, I have trust in it. Though I have no need to label it through any one religion, I understand now that faith in itself is an “act of God.”