"The Rearview: A Love Letter to Freshman Year"
Going into my first year, my goals were centered around letter grades and the chase of academic perfection. It was after worrying myself to no end that I realized college was not just going to classes, but rather what you can get out of your classes. You must chase what you are passionate about, not what gets you a one-way ticket to law school. That is a lesson I had to learn the hard way. This philosophy has led me to finding a major that I can connect with my own strengths. Through our public speaking class with Dr. Van Horn, I found excitement in public speaking and eventually found a home in public relations. The MMSC Department has been a blessing, and those within it have helped me to find my own individuality both on campus and in Scholars.
For my artifact I chose to include some samples of my growth in photography. Calling myself a photographer feels like a stretch, but I am a photography enthusiast in all senses of the title. I took up the hobby to help me in PR and gain more experience in media design, but it quickly changed into one of the best outlets for my own creativity I could ever find. I have worked hard and filled up countless SD cards to get to where I am, and a year from now I will be able to look back and say the same thing. Growth is a constant thing, and it is quite fulfilling when you can see it visually. I chose to include it because it is something about myself that is not strictly academic, but rather helped me to gain more confidence in myself. I am proud of what I do, and I want to share it with anyone who happens to see this portfolio.
My goals for next year can be expressed with a phrase from my favorite song, “Unwritten” by Natasha Bedingfield. The lyrics, “Release your inhibitions. Feel the rain on your skin” helped me to overcome a lot this year. I had to let go of a lot of things that dragged me down, and next year I want to “feel the rain on my skin” and enjoy it all. I want to maintain my 4.00 and work to make progress in my major. I aim to relish every second, every paper, every project, and every class because college is short. I am blessed to be in such a wonderful program surrounded by some of my favorite people. I am incredibly thankful to know professors, mentors, and other students as I continue my academic journey.
This essay may seem emotional, but I would be doing an injustice to myself as a Scholar if I did not acknowledge how much I have grown as a person during my first year. It feels bittersweet to draft this essay in my empty first-year dorm the night before I leave for the summer. I use the word bittersweet because the emotions I am experiencing at this moment are the opposite to what I experienced my first night in this room. My first night was filled with anxiety and fear, but at the end of spring finals season I am filled with clarity and excitement. I am looking forward to the future because I found a major that I am passionate about, hobbies that I love, and good people in my life that I can depend on. It seems very poetic, but there is such clarity when you know what the time you feared for looks like.
Freshman Year,
Thank you for everything. The embarrassing moments, painstaking dining hall meals, and amazing triumphs alike.
With love,
Maddy
Scenes from Freshmen Year