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As time passed and my husband grew more distant, I found solace in prayer. I prayed that he would one day overcome his weakness for women. I longed for the early days of our marriage. A time when we were happy and he was in love with me. I knew I would forgive him for anything. If only he would acknowledge his mistakes and the fact that he needed help. I’ll never forget the day I heard his sister Shurpanakha shrieking as she crashed through the front door.
I was out in the gardens when I heard her yelling about something that had happened. Concerned, I decided to see if I could help in any way. As I neared the house I noticed that she was going on about some man named Rama and his wife Sita. She began to explain in great detail how beautiful Sita was.
“Where is she? I must have her,” Ravana exclaimed in awe as she continued to go on about her. At this moment I knew I was about to lose my husband for good. If he somehow was able to win Sita’s heart, he would forget all about me.
In the days after this conversation took place I felt as though I was a stranger in my own house. My husband barely acknowledged my presence. He was always in his office. His footsteps pacing back and forth every night would keep me awake and anxious. I could tell he was plotting. One morning I heard him packing his things. I could tell he was preparing for a journey. I knew this was the day his plan was set into motion. As he was just about to leave I made the decision to confront him. I couldn’t just sit back and watch my husband chase after another woman.
“Where are you going?” I asked as I stepped between my husband and the front door. He glared at me and I could see the anger rising up in his eyes.
“Nothing that concerns you. I have some business to attend to and I’m already late. So whatever this is can we please talk about it later?”
“Business?” I rolled my eyes. “I know this is about that Sita girl. Please, Ravana, I’m begging you, don’t do anything you’ll regret.”
“You don’t know anything. Rama hurt my sister and I need to avenge her.”
“Please, Ravana, I know this is about more than that. Everyone knows how beautiful his wife is. I know you’re trying to steal her from him.”
“How dare you accuse me of such a thing? I’m your husband. Show me some respect. I’m not going to deal with this right now so move before you make me really angry.” With that Ravana shoved me to the side and stormed out. I was left in tears and feeling completely hopeless. I knew he was about to do something very foolish and dangerous. Rama had broken Shiva’s bow. I didn’t doubt for a moment that he would be able to defeat my husband. Unfortunately my husband’s anger and tunnel vision would cost him his life. Unless I could do something about it.
Days passed and there was still no news of Ravana. I wondered where he could be right now and I prayed that he was okay. One night as I struggled to fall asleep I heard a thud at the front door. I walked downstairs to inspect the sounds when I saw my husband enter followed by a woman. He dragged her by the arm to one of the side rooms and slammed the door behind him. I thought about going downstairs to see what was happening but I could tell my husband was angry. When Ravana was angry there was no telling what he could do.
In the days that followed, all I could do was stay silent and pray. Unfortunately my husband could not overcome his obsession and this led to his downfall. In the end he died at the hands of Rama. In the war, he not only lost his life but the woman who cared for him more than anything. After he passed Rama took pity on me and suggested I marry Ravana's brother. Your father Vibhishana is good to me and treats me in a way Ravana never could. Even though he still has a special place in my heart, I know this is what I was meant to be. So, daughters, if there's one thing you learn from my story, never let a man determine your worth. Don't let anyone treat you any less than you're deserving of.
Author's Note:
I chose to continue writing from first person in this next story. This way the reader can really see the thoughts she is thinking when she is experiencing her husband's betrayal. First person allows Mandodari to convey her emotions throughout the story. This story is a continuation of the story Mandodari has been telling her daughters. I plan on this being the last one. In this story all of her daughters' questions will be answered. Mandodari tells her daughters of how her marriage went bad and all the difficulties she faced as Ravana's wife. This story introduces the war with Rama and Ravana's infatuation with Sita. During this time Mandodari stays faithful and maintains her hope that her husband will eventually give up other woman. This is a draft so I plan on expanding further into what happens when Ravana kidnaps Sita and the repercussions. I would like to give Mandodari a bigger role than the Ramayana gave her. This story will continue up until the war and Ravana's death. After this Mandodari marries Ravana's brother. I'd like to give her a happier ending than what it seems like she got in the Ramayana.
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