Using Inclusive Language and Understanding Key Terms
LGBTQ+
On this website, we have chosen the term LGBTQ+ to refer, inclusively, to individuals who identify as (L) lesbian, (G) gay, (B) bisexual, (T) transgender, (Q) queer or questioning, and more; the plus symbol serves both to recognize specifically the other letters that have been included in the acronym (as in LGBTQQIA), and to represent the idea that there will always be more identities than can be captured by letters alone. Using a plus symbol indicates that this community is large and diverse, and that while there may not be a letter for every individual, the intent of the acronym is inclusive. The plus symbol also provides space for and recognition of the ever-evolving nature of gender and sexual identities. Other similar acronyms you might encounter for this group of people include LGBT, LGBTQ, LGBTQIA, and LGBTQQIA. The language and acronyms we use for members of this community has and will continue to evolve as our understanding and recognition of diverse gender and sexual identities continue to grow.
Visit our glossary to see current definitions for some of the terms you may need when talking to or working with the LGBTQ+ community. Or, scroll to the bottom of this page to read about pronouns!
Why does using inclusive language matter?
While learning new terms or changing old habits may be difficult, it is important to be intentional with language. What we name people matters. “Having the language to describe one’s gender identity outside of the gender binary is liberating and creates community among people experiencing gender in similar ways. We all have the right to have language to define ourselves.” (https://www.glsen.org/sites/default/files/Gender%20Terminology%20Guide.pdf)
Using gender inclusive language is not just about recognizing and respecting our students’ self-identifications, it is also about providing the language and the space for all our students to engage in self-discovery and self-understanding: “Facilitative language means using labels and terms that embrace students across the gender spectrum, not just cisgender and transgender, but gender expansive, gender fluid, and gender-questioning children as well. Language must support gender identity exploration in ways that are developmentally appropriate for children, including making space for gender ambiguity and shifting gender identities...children can take the initiative when they are given language and narratives that grant them agency of exploration and self-determination, facilitating growth into an authentic self” (Luecke, 2018, p. 7).
What if I don't understand? What if I'm uncomfortable?
It is normal for someone to not have a vocabulary for things they haven’t been exposed to or had experience with. If you’ve never participated in a car repair, for example, you may not know the words for the various parts of a car engine. In order to have a conversation about how to repair a car, you would need to learn that vocabulary. Similarly, if you haven’t ever known someone who identified as LGBTQ+, you might not have ever needed to know these terms. As educators, however, it is our moral obligation to serve every student that walks through the door - and that means accepting and acknowledging them for who they are. If you don’t even have the words to describe someone, how can you hope to connect with them enough to help them thrive? If you don’t even have a word for me, I might feel invisible in your classroom or school.
It is normal to experience some discomfort or confusion when you hear words and concepts you have not previously been exposed to. If you meet someone who uses any of these terms to describe themself, and you aren’t sure what the term means, it is OK to ask them “What does that mean to you?” (source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=368&v=DE7bKmOXY3w)
While the discomfort and confusion about new things are natural, it is important that educators recognize that it is their obligation to push beyond those feelings and make a proactive effort to increase their understanding and comfort with the new language and terms. Often discomfort and unfamiliarity can be used to dismiss the need to learn and change, and be cited as reasons not to try to adapt our language and behaviors. It is important that we both recognize this natural tendency and be proactive about moving past it.
"So how do I learn more about these things without forcing someone who is LGBTQ+ to feel like they have to educate me?"
"New allies who want to support LGBT Americans often face an array of confusing terminology and language. An Ally's Guide to Terminology: Talking About LGBT People & Equality offers an overview of essential vocabulary and some terms to avoid. It also includes general terminology and approaches for talking about LGBT issues using everyday language that emphasizes common values, beliefs, hopes and dreams—and which reminds audiences that LGBT people are everyday Americans who live everyday lives. "
A Further Investigation
"So what is the difference between gender and sex?"
"Historically, the terms "sex" and "gender" have been used interchangeably, but their uses are becoming increasingly distinct, and it is important to understand the differences between the two. "
"If it doesn't affect me, why do I need to know the difference between sex, sexuality, and gender? I think it is a binary system."
PRONOUNS
What About Pronouns?
In some spaces, it is becoming more common for people to include their pronouns when introducing themselves. What this means is that if a person named Alex wants to be referred to as she or her, she will say “Hi, I’m Alex. My pronouns are she/her/hers.” You may also see this in a person’s online profile or on their resume.
Just as it is important to use accurate and respectful language to name and describe everyone on the gender spectrum, it is also important to use accurate and respectful pronouns when referring to people.
Another way to support sexual and gender minority individuals is to normalize this practice. If only minorities introduce their pronouns, it will mark them as others. However, if everyone makes a habit of including their pronouns in introductions, it will be accepted as a general practice and not necessarily one that calls out a difference.
Can “They” Be Singular?
Someone asked me this question just the other day, and you know what I told them? I said they should do a quick search to see if anyone had documented the use of “they” as a singular pronoun in English. Then I asked them how surprised they would be if I told them THEY use it this way all the time.
In case you didn’t notice, I just used “they” as a singular pronoun five times, and it wasn’t even in the interest of respecting nonbinary gender identities. The truth is, “they” has been used as a singular pronoun for centuries. Learn more in this blog post from the Oxford English Dictionary: https://public.oed.com/blog/a-brief-history-of-singular-they/#