Content Warning:
Discussions of mental health & illness, abuse
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Content Warning:
Discussions of mental health & illness, abuse
Ezekiel, preferring to go by 'Zeke', is the main protagonist of Chaos Before Apocalypse & a founding member of Team Chaos. He's a college student studying in Biomedical Sciences, with intent to someday become a doctor.
He is the former heir of The Quantum Order, having been raised to eventually lead it. ...Then he realised his mother, Persophia, was actually totally evil & left.
Currently, after having run away from the Order, he is roommates with Tyler.
❤️Personality
Analytical, intelligent, simultaneously prideful & egotistic yet disliking himself greatly. Somehow both incredibly self-centred yet selfless. Zeke often tries to remain objective & stoic, with a strict no-nonsense attitude- Instead of this making him seem emotionless, however; it has the opposite effect, as he routinely becomes frustrated & explosive when things don't go according to plan. ...A trait he shares with his brother.
He can be stubborn, holier-than-thou, and judgemental; often underestimating the capabilities of others & making decisions on other people's behalf, unwilling to see anyone else's perspective, and assuming that he knows best. He doesn't handle not being the smartest person in the room that well, but also holds himself to way-too-high perfectionist standards. Ironically enough, he's fairly impulsive & not much of a planner- being so confident in his own ability to think his way through situations on the fly.
For all his intelligence & skill; Zeke is extremely sheltered & doesn't have a lot of street-smarts. But he has far too much pride & guilt to admit his faults; so he prefers not to make a fuss when he's the one needing help. When prodded, he'll outright lie about it & say he has everything under control. He doesn't mean anything malicious by it, but he has a bad habit of lying by omission, hiding information, telling half-truths, or bending a few details. Little white lies to save his own skin or spare others the trouble, that can build up & hurt more than he realises.
Despite his flaws, though, Zeke is genuinely well-meaning. He has an incredibly compassionate soul & does care deeply for those he loves, as well as a sincere passion for medicine, healthcare, and helping others; but he doesn't exactly know how to express that, so he tends to go either above-&-beyond or none-at-all, with little in-between. He wants to be a better person, a good person, so badly; but he has no idea where to start. So for now, he lets the guilt within him fester; not yet realising that he has to improve for his own sake than others, and he can't abuse himself into being a better person.
✅Likes
Healthcare, research, documentaries, rock music, comics, typing out 10,000 word essays analysing his favourite comics, cleanliness, reading, medical dramas, the colour pink
❌Dislikes
Video games, social media, using weapons, loud noises
(S1 Appearance, aged 20-21)
(Late S2 / Most of S3 Appearance, aged 22-23)
(Post-Canon appearance, aged 23+. Half his face got burnt in an explosion, but he's fine apart from that. He stops dyeing his hair & ties it in a ponytail.)
👤Full Name:
Ishikawa Ezekiel / 石川 Ezekiel
⏳Age: 20-23 Years Old
🎤Voiceclaim: Miles Edgeworth/Mitsurugi Reiji.
🌍Species: Human
🗺️Ethnicity: Yamato Japanese
🚻Gender: Non-Binary (He doesn't know this at the beginning of canon & thinks he's a cis man at first; realises xe's enby in the middle of his arc. Symbolic of him "killing" the terrible person he used to be, & the freedom of experimenting with xyr identity as opposed to the restriction in his childhood.)
❓Pronouns:
He/Him
Xe/Xem (Uses alongside He/Him after realising xyr gender.)
💖Orientation: Gay
🔉Languages: Japanese, British English
💘Love Interests:
They're polyamorous & everyone is aware of each others' relationships!
📚Unique Abilities
Medical Knowledge
Scientific Knowledge
Weapons Proficiency (Blaster)
Ezekiel had undergone private tutoring to become sufficient at combat since young, training with a wide variety of weapons. He mostly prefers the plasma gun he has in his pocket, but has advanced knowledge on numerous weapons.
Magic (Healing)
Everyone has magic with the potential to do literally anything if they trained hard enough. Zeke's mostly dedicated his time to learning how to heal physical wounds & injuries; though it's only small injuries he can heal magically for now. The rest, it's up to good old-fashioned medical technology.
💛Relationships
Persophia: Growing up, Zeke had always been his mother's favourite, as she praised him for his intelligence & skill, telling him he was destined for great things in the future; though that praise would soon turn into a pressure, as she enrolled him in various weapons-training lessons & advanced education courses as a child, expressing her clear disdain & disappointment if he ever dared achieve anything less than perfection & soiled the family's reputation, making a fool of everyone's time. Showing too much vulnerability, beit emotional or physical, was not something to be tolerated. It was childish & unbecoming.
Fearful of abandonment, and desperate for his mother's respect & approval, Zeke often pushed himself to the limits in order to meet her ever-increasing standards, priding himself on his skill, but also causing him to develop the judgemental & self-centred mindset he has today. He never felt like he could be honest about how he felt with Persophia, or tell the truth whenever he made a mistake, in fear of being punished or mocked; causing him to develop the bad habit of lying about things whenever possible. He never really questioned her teachings further; shouldn't he just be grateful that his very famous & very busy mother's willing to give him the time of day, especially compared to his brother? It's surely his own fault, if she happens to be cross with him, right? She's just harsh because she loves him & knows he can put his talents to good use if he just tried harder, right?
Nowadays, after running away from the Quantum Order & the rest of his family, Zeke is horrified at Persophia's cruelty & cunning, and feels immense guilt & frustration over having wasted his entire life supporting & trying to impress someone so horrible, but still hasn't yet realised the full extent of the abuse & neglect she dealt him & his brother. He's more confused & shocked about her actions than anything, as he remembers her being so encouraging of him, showering him with affection & praise whenever he worked hard to earn it. But as he learns more about what is & what isn't healthy, he's starting to see a lot of things, including his old experiences, in a new light; and the results of that hindsight feel terrifying to confront.
Adam: Even when they were kids, things were always tense between the two brothers, growing increasingly competitive with their mother's encouragement- at the same time, however, Zeke was parentified & expected to keep a constant eye on Adam despite only being about a year apart in age. Adam resented Zeke for being their mother's favourite; while Zeke thought himself as high-&-mightily above Adam's childish anger, while they both competed for their mother's approval & respect; fearful of abandonment, while at the same time growing over-reliant on one another. Neither of them ever listened to each other's woes, & both grew frustrated at the other for never listening.
They do love each other as family, deep down; but it's under layers upon layers of bitterness, anger, & hate.
After Zeke leaves, Adam just... snaps. He sees it as a betrayal of their family, causing all the years of resentment to bubble to the surface, raw & unfiltered. Zeke, meanwhile, feels immense regret at leaving Adam behind, and wants nothing more than to reconnect- but he still doesn't yet see Adam as a fully equal person, instead viewing himself as the heroic saviour who should bear responsibility for cleansing Adam's evil.
If things are ever going to get better between them, they need to learn how to stop making it all about themselves, & listen.
Ryan: Ryan & Zeke pretty much fell in love at first sight; or, rather, love at first nerd-talk. Being tasked to work together for a project in one of their shared college modules, they were the first to match each other in terms of both scientific prowess & passion for the subject, easily understanding & building upon each other's ideas; an unexpected, though certainly not unwelcome change for them both, quickly growing into a mutual crush.
For Zeke, Ryan's presence was the first taste he's ever had of genuine & no-strings-attached human interaction. At first, he was unsure of what to make of Ryan's straightforward compassion, though quickly growing fond & attached. Ryan, meanwhile, found Zeke's awkwardness to be incredibly cute & endearing. Though Ryan was concerned by Zeke's closed-off-ness & lying habit, he never really connected the dots, assuming Zeke was just... like that, and only needed a friend & fresh air.
After getting to know each other more, their bond grew beyond just being nerds together, when they both realised they had issues with perfectionism & making mistakes, as well as being concerned for their younger siblings. When it came to their shared perfectionism, between Ryan's insecurity & Zeke's history; it was kind of a "If I'm allowed to mess up sometimes & be worthy of love regardless, then so are you," deal; reassuring & bringing each other out of their shells. Seeing Ryan & Nova's bond was what taught Zeke about what an actually healthy sibling bond should look like; while seeing Zeke & Adam's estrangement was what taught Ryan about what could happen if Ryan continued not listening to Nova.
Tyler: Tyler & Zeke didn't really get along that well at first, taking even longer to fall in love. They were more like friends-of-a-friend, both being mutually close to Ryan. Zeke initially thought Tyler as... well, a clumsy oaf who wouldn't be very helpful, while Tyler felt disconcerted but willing to give him the benefit of the doubt.
As time went on, however, their awkward mild-dislike turned into a bit of a rivalry; as Tyler grew annoyed by Zeke's condescending & infantilising behaviour (especially considering he was actually older than Zeke), & Zeke grew frustrated at constantly having to make sure Tyler didn't get himself killed trying to handle things he was obviously unskilled at.
Weirdly enough, that was the push Tyler needed to build his self-confidence enough to snap at Zeke, standing up for himself for the first time in his life; & the push Zeke needed to realise he wasn't exactly being the greatest friend, furthering his resolve to make amends for his mistakes. Things were a bit dicey after that, but once they both established themselves as equals, their fondness for each other grew.
Tyler grows fond of Zeke's nerdiness & appreciates his efforts to be a better person, while Zeke grows admiration for Tyler's adaptability & resourcefulness. Somehow, both of their feelings of being indebted to the people around them, cancel themselves out when added together- like two negatives creating a positive- teaching each other that they're not inherently burdens for existing & don't need to justify being human.
Emiko: From the start; Zeke & Emiko never really saw eye-to-eye. Emiko saw through Zeke's lies & holier-than-thou act from the get-go, while Zeke avoided her, not willing to spend time defending himself. At best, the two just tried to steer clear of each other, while at worst, they bickered & argued constantly. This was until Emiko went missing, on account of being turned into a Reaper Hound, only being cured a year later.
They tried avoiding each other after that; though Emiko still had her suspicions & kept an eye on Zeke, not fully trusting that he wasn't going to betray Team Chaos & run back to his mother's side; even with everyone else's testifying about Zeke trying so hard to save her with the Reaper Hound antidote, earlier. Zeke, meanwhile, just... took Emiko's snide remarks, too overridden by guilt to defend himself. Out of protectiveness for the others, the two didn't drag anyone else into their quarrel, but didn't let anyone else try to give their two cents, either.
As time went on, though, and they had to spend more time together out of necessity; Zeke became eager to prove that he was trying to be better, while Emiko started loosening up a bit. After hearing the stories that others told her about him, seeing his earnest efforts; as well as both of them learning more about each other, their pasts, motivations, their experiences with over-alertness caused by their trauma, and how much they both cared so much about the others... well, the two found sort of a kindred spirit with one another; giving way to understanding & mutual apologies.
Later on, Emiko sees through his lies; this time with sympathy & concern, instead of scrutiny; getting Zeke to open up honestly when he needs help- teaching him a few tricks she's learnt in therapy. Likewise, Zeke looks out for her when she gets wrapped up in her own head. They pull each other out of the darkness; & together, they're a strategic force to be reckoned with. Emiko still distrusts Zeke somewhat, while Zeke isn't as open as he'd like to be with her, but they are friends who do care for each other greatly.
🔬Random Facts
Has a vase where he keeps all the flowers that Tyler gifts him.
Zeke has a bunch of acne scars & pores. It's usually barely visible unless under certain light conditions, but they're there!
Top 10 guys who have to learn how to take responsibility for his actions & change himself for the better, but also has to learn he has to improve for his own sake & not others' & that constantly beating himself up over the guilt is not an effective way to become a better person!!! You can't abuse yourself into improvement!!! Self-punishment is not the same as self-improvement!!!!!! Aaaaahhhhh!!!!
Persophia & Adam always call him by his full first name, Ezekiel. Emiko, Tyler, Ryan, & Nova always call him by his nickname, Zeke. Later on, after realising xe's non-binary, Zeke is what xe prefers most.
Zeke's lying habit in particular developed due to being raised in such a high-strung environment. Lying helped keep him out of trouble when he feared honesty would get him punished or ostracised. It sure as hell makes his crippling guilt complex a whole lot worse! Later on, he learns to catch himself & tack on, "Wait, apologies, I just lied," before speaking the truth.
Tugs on his sweater's collar as a nervous habit.
Zones out when there's more than one person trying to have a conversation with him. Speak to him directly & he'll absorb everything; address him as part of a group & all he hears is noise.
Never had a father; he & Adam are Persophia's clone babies.
I still need to do further research, but I'm thinking he probably has Narcissistic Personality Disorder that he developed due to all the stuff happening in his childhood?? If he does then he only got diagnosed post-canon when xe started going to therapy. Would really appreciate someone giving him a sincere compliment & telling him he's done a good job, actually.
Speaks very formally in a low, snappy, almost monotone voice- until he's noticed something's gone wrong & he freaks out: "Well, according to my research, all this data indicates is that- what are you two doing?! Cease that action THIS INSTANT- Of course I completed the assignment- no, I didn't, that was a blatant lie, but I will proceed to complete it imminently-"