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SPD is a bit of a new frontier. Be thankful you're not raising a child 20 years ago when no one would have recognized your child's unique needs!
To get an understanding of SPD, you first need to understand typical sensory processing.
Everyone has Sensory Needs
Our bodies are constantly getting sensory input from many different body systems. Our brains must sort all that information & decide what is important to focus on and if any input needs our immediate attention.
Someone that is neuro-typical can handle multiple things coming at them at once while giving the proper attention to the most important things.
The brain of a person with Sensory Processing Disorder struggles to filter & organize these sensations properly, often triggering a seemingly unnecessary fight or flight
Everyone's needs are different.
Some sensory input gets lost in the shuffle, causing a person to seek out that input. Imagine if the signals that tell your body that you're safely resting in a chair weren't working properly. Your body would be lacking awareness of its place in space and desperate for some feedback. Hence, your body will want rough touch, and jolting activities.
Others are overly sensitive to certain input & react in fear, anger or general avoidance. Imagine what it feels like when you first put your socks on. You're very aware of them. But what if your brain continued to make you aware of them AND every other sensation, continuously, throughout the day. Yeah, I'd want to pull my hair out too!
The Different Senses
Tactile
Most of us are familiar with tactile input. It's anything we experience through the skin. It's all things touch.
Some kids crave tactile input and will have individual preferences for soft, scratchy, sticky, etc. They love to run their hands along things or get extra dirty via mud, food etc.
Some kids avoid tactile input. Their brain perceives it as a threat and will react with fear or aggression. This is especially troublesome with clothing choices and picky eating (because of texture issues).
Vestibular
Maybe not a word you're all too familiar with. Vestibular input comes from the inner ear and affects all things balance and movement.
Some kids seek in this area and get input from swinging, hanging upside down and general movement like rocking.
Some kids avoid this input out of fear. They typically hate highest and anything that knocks them "off balance". They usually have gravitational insecurity.
Proprioception
Yes, someday you'll be so comfortable with this word that you'll know how to spell it too! Proprioception is input that comes from the joints. Think of it as how your body is aware of where it is in space. It's all things weight and pressure.
This sense is the KING of sensory processing. It is the regulator that helps kids handle all their other senses. The more proprioceptive input the better! I always tell parents to start here if they want to see dramatic improvement.
All kids need proprioceptive input. But some kids are under-sensitive in this area so the proprioception they do get gets lost in the shuffle. They then desperately need more proprioception and often seek it in very ROUGH ways. They bang, crash, chew and jump constantly!
Visual, Auditory, Smell
These are pretty self-explanatory. Some kids crave it, some kids hate it. Proprioceptive input will help with it all in a general way. It's worth noting that some auditory and visual issues actually stem from vestibular problems. If the inner ear isn't working properly, hearing and things as simple as visual tracking during head movement become quite difficult.