July 25, 2023 - 17 years later

From Amy, my mom

For me, it's the flags. The Italian flags that make their appearance every year at this time. St Mary’s feast, an Italian feast, started a tradition in The Knightsville Neighborhood. Once those flags are displayed, they serve as a reminder of the worst time in my life. They trigger such a deep visceral reaction that I'm glad I don't live in the area anymore. Let me explain - The end of a happy, hot July, and the preparations for the feast were in full effect. My mother cooking non - stop and setting up the front porch for family and visitors. It was a front-row spot to the parade, the fireworks, and all the fun that traveled right past the house. I came home from work that Saturday afternoon and immediately began helping with the preparations. A large, rectangular Italian flag draped over the porch railing, and as I was about to hang it under the watchful eye of my mother, my phone rang. “Get to the hospital right away, Shawn’s going in for surgery,” his sister said… I dropped the flag and sped down to Rhode Island Hospital without having time to process anything. I drive by the feast, the rides, the lights, the flags. How could this be happening? He was having an emergency craniotomy to evacuate a massive subdural hematoma. He was brought in unconscious and the neurosurgeon came out to ask if any of us knew what happened to him - was he in a fight, it appeared he was struck with something. None of this made sense. Later that night after all but his mother had left, we sat in the darkened room, praying and trying to piece together what could have happened. As the clock approached midnight, I walked out to the nurses' station. They were extremely kind and shared with me his CT exam… the results were dire; there was no brain activity following the surgery; he never regained consciousness. No chance to say goodbye, no miracle. Shawn remained on life support until midday Sunday,  then the decision was made. He had no second chance. Late that night, I briefly left to go home and shower and grab a change of clothes. Driving back to the hospital, again I saw the feast - the rides, now still in the late hours, the flags taunting me. How unfair! How could this go on while he’s dying? I raged at God in my car on my way back to the hospital. Why? Why can't you save him, why can't this just be a bad dream?? I didn’t leave the hospital again until Shawn took his last breath at 1:24 PM on Tuesday, July 25th, 2006. I held his hand the entire time, I didn't want to leave for a moment and miss his last breath, 34 years old. His life was so short, for no reason. I met him when I was only 17 and he was 20. We were just kids, and while it certainly wasn't a normal relationship, he was my daughter's father and I could not just leave his side. So you swallow your grief and you let the anger simmer deep inside of you, and you wake up every day because your daughter needs you and you go through the motions. You go to work, you work so much you never see your family, but you have to because you have to get by. You pray for sleep that never comes, and you hope one day the tears will stop. You visit the cemetery to talk to him, you cut the grass and clean the stone, and place new flowers on holidays and special occasions. And time marches on, year after year the flags still go up, and the feast goes on. In 2015 you lose your mother and the grief becomes unbearable. You pray for sleep so you can dream of them. My mother loved him like her own. And then a year later, his mother, Ellen passes and the late-night calls when you were working the third shift come to an end. Somehow it feels like your last connection to him has ended now. But you try to imagine the three of them up in heaven, my Mom and Ellen having coffee and gossiping watching over Shawn. 

So here we are 17 years later. (How can it be that long?). Some days it feels like it was just yesterday and you cannot be more proud of the amazing woman your daughter has become. Her resiliency, despite it all. She has taken this case so much farther than I could have so many years ago. She fights tirelessly and does not take NO for an answer. She has put in countless hours of work to find the answers, and with all the momentum, it finally feels like it's okay to hope again. That justice will be served. 

Once again another hazy hot July and the flags get displayed. Once again, I'm transported back to that time, holding his hand, praying for a miracle. But I'm older now, jaded, if not wiser and I know how cruel time can be. So this year when the flags go up, maybe, just maybe, this story can have a different ending. 

Dear Attorney General Neronha,

Thank you in advance for your time, consideration, and collaboration with me as I write to implore you for your attention to the case of Shawn O’Brien, my father, who was met with an untimely death in 2006 at the age of 34. 

The Cranston Police have had this case on their books since July 2006 when my father passed away and my family contacted them to alert them there was something amiss. While initially labeled a medical call, the Cranston Police believe there was a potential crime. 

While they believed themselves to be thorough in 2006, there has been no progress in this case. Cranston Police have admitted, in meetings with myself and other witnesses, that they believe this case to be murder, and know who did it, but cannot prove it. As I write this letter, Cranston Police have been the opposite of collaborative and forthcoming. 

Please consider this a formal request for Rhode Island State Police intervention based on the following:

• Out of 12 emails to the detective assigned to the case, only 6 have received a response. Three of the remaining 12 went with a follow-up email with no response.

• Out of 22 APRA requests beginning in 2019, eight receive a response. Six were denied. Two were appealed to Col. Winquist and awarded. Two escalated to an appeal to your office, both appeals of which I was awarded the initially requested documents. There is active withholding of information that suggests the department is being purposely unforthcoming. 

• In a letter to Col. Winquist dated 3/1/22, I requested any documents that were sent to the medical examiner’s office, following my meeting with Dr. Chirkov on 2/25/22. As these documents were communicated with a medical professional, it does not fall under an invasion of privacy as my father’s next of kin. Col. Winquist responded in a letter dated 3/14/22 “The Cranston Police do not have any records responsive to…” regarding this request. This is untrue. Dr. Chirkov referenced only two pages that had been sent to him during the autopsy investigation. Further, Det. Santagata, during a meeting on 2/22/22, read aloud notes between detectives assigned in 2006 and Dr. Chirkov. It is incorrect that the department has neither copies of records sent nor records of notes taken. Again, there is active withholding of information that suggests the department is being purposely unforthcoming. 

• In requests dated 6/7/22 6/15/22, 7/6/22, and 2/23/22, I requested information pertaining to evidence and what was available, tested, or revealed the presence of my father’s DNA. All requests went ignored. In an appeal to your office dated 9/23/22, I was awarded a response from Capt. McAteer confirmed that 10 items collected were not tested for DNA. This lack of response contributes to the theory that Cranston Police are unwilling to collaborate. 

• These same requests suggest that the department did not adequately investigate the case in 2006, especially lacking DNA testing. This suggests the department actively chose not to investigate this case for reasons unknown. 

• In an email dated 10/6/22, Captain McAteer stated “I am currently waiting for a call back from the Rhode Island Department of Health to inquire about their criteria for submission for DNA testing for this case. I will also be making the same inquiry to the FBI.” No response has been received on this line of inquiry, suggesting the department is not actively working with state resources to further any investigation supported by DNA evidence. 

• I have curated an opportunity for a nonprofit to financially support the advance DNA testing in this case. I have sent the information, pertaining to this opportunity to Det. Santagata, Col. Winquist, and Capt. McAteer on 10/20/22 with the following: The organization will pay the entire cost of the testing and it is completely confidential with results going straight to the investigative team. On 10/31/22 I responded to the email again, adding in Mr. Stephen Dambruch. On 12/6/22 I responded to the email thread again. Again, no response has been received on this line of inquiry, suggesting the department is not willing to work with outside resources to further any investigation supported by DNA evidence. 

• In a warrant dated 10/1/06, Det. Sgt. Michael Gates wrote in part “Cranston Police executed a search of Mr. O’Brien’s residence resulted in police finding blood evidence within, also inconsistent with a fall.” The warrant goes on to state the investigation revealed “blood residue and spatter in areas of the dwelling away from where Mr. O’Brien was discovered at the time of the rescue presence.” This suggests the Cranston Police believed there was evidence of a crime in 2006 and investigated as such but actively chose not to classify this case as a homicide. 

• In a meeting with Dr. Chirkov on 2/25/22, he explained that the Cranston Police Department must provide additional information for his ruling to change. A recording of this meeting is available. In an independent affidavit dated 6/23/22, Dr. Shiping Bao, an independent forensic pathologist, deemed this death a homicide. This affidavit was provided to Det. Santagata. The Cranston Police maintain that this case is considered a medical incident, despite multiple pathologists suggesting otherwise. Further, in the search warrant dated 8/1/06, Det. Sgt. Michael Gates states in part “When police consulted with the Medical Examiner’s Office, Dr. Chirkoff conclude that the magnitude and extent of the trauma to Mr. O’Brien’s head, were inconsistent with a fall that would be caused by a seizure.” This refusal to reclassify this case suggests the department is purposely ignoring pertinent medical information in an effort to avoid penalty, investigation, or release of information in regard to this case. 

I have participated in or petitioned seven opportunities of media outreach including investigative news, YouTube, and podcasts. The Cranston Police have refused to collaborate using these resources. Despite multiple offers of collaboration, such as

 “I continue to appreciate the department’s attentiveness and collaboration in regard to my father’s death. My goal has always been and continues to be, to maintain a positive, collaborative relationship with the department while advocating for justice. While I can appreciate the department’s work in 2006 and 2007 in regard to this case, I continue to misunderstand some of the logistics, especially with the classification of the case and the communication with the medical examiner. I am hopeful we can continue to maintain a collaborative relationship as I am open to supporting the department in any way possible as it pertains to my father’s death.” 

in a letter to Col. Winquist dated 11/1/22. The department is, at this point, unwilling to collaborate or support each other’s efforts in the pursuit of justice for my father. It is my belief that the Cranston Police are frustrated with the media that has come out around my father’s death that highlights, points out, or exposes any of their errors. Their refusal to communicate, utilize the resources being offered, or actively investigate this case is a direct result of their frustration with me. 

It is all of this and more, Attorney General Neronha, that leads me, with great regret, to request Rhode Island State Police involvement in the death of my father, Shawn O’Brien. At this point, my working relationship with the Cranston Police has stalled. Without family involvement, I do not see how this case will ever result in justice. I thank you again for your time and willingness to develop solutions in this matter. I can be reached on my cell phone at XXXXXXXX anytime and would be more than happy to schedule a meeting.

December 5, 2022

Birthdays

It was a really rough weekend. I had to work on Saturday to get some training done. When I finally got to leave for the weekend, it was pouring and cold. I didn't dress for the weather and I was soaked from the walk to my car. I tried to place a Stop and Shop pick-up order but the website kept crashing so now I had to go grocery shopping for real; one of my least favorite things to do. Despite enjoying spending money (at TJ Maxx), grocery shopping is the bane of my existence. When I get to the store it's busy and half of what I need is out of stock. My shoes are wet and my hair is on my face. I meet Matt for lunch and I'm miserable the entire time. I don't want to be here, or anywhere for that matter. Sunday comes and I don't want to get out of bed. I actually hit the snooze button so many times the alarm just shut off entirely. With great effort, I drag myself out and barely get ready. I'm annoyed with everyone around me and have no patience to speak of. 

Then his birthday comes. Today was tough. Somebody asked me if my allergies were acting up because my eyes were so swollen but really I had just been up crying all night. I never admit that, so don't hold it against me. He would be 51 today. Years ago I would have laughed at how old that sounded. Over halfway through life, 51 sounded like lightyears away. Now that I'm 30, approaching the same age he was when he died, 51 is nothing. I wonder how he would have celebrated and what I would have picked out for a gift. I wonder if I would have bought a cake or had time to make one myself. I think about how absolutely heartbreaking it is that he is not here today to celebrate.

There are three days a year that prove difficult - Father's Day, the anniversary, and his birthday. I don't know which one will be the worst each year and by today I've already been through the first two. They were both difficult this year and I didn't anticipate his birthday hitting me as hard as it did today. Working through the case and putting the effort that I do into justice is exhausting. I can't say I do this every day - I simply don't have the time and there are too many dead ends to keep going sometimes. Plus, it would drive anyone insane. Today all I can do is live in these moments. I have to acknowledge that he is gone and his birthdays will never be the same. I revel in each second I am alive, with my family, living my dream every day in my career and life. I'm blessed that  I still have the opportunity to wake up every day and enjoy each second. It is hard to not live in the past, in regret, in depression. It is difficult to wake up each morning when he does not. It is difficult to watch the clock, the calendar, and the years, flow by when he is not here to enjoy them, too. As cliche as it sounds, I know he wouldn't want me to live in the past or be sad. He was not a sad person and I'm not either. He would want me to grab each day and make it mine. He would want me to solve his case. Here's to happy birthdays and many more. 

August 25, 2022

Christy Godwin

I say all the time that I don't believe in psychics or mediums. Despite that, I'm drawn whenever I have an inkling that someone could provide me with answers. I met with Christy Godwin, a medium out of the Midwest on Zoom a few weeks ago. It was eye-opening, productive, and this case won't go on forever. 

On a completely different note, there's been a lot of drama around me taking all of this on. I haven't addressed it nor do I want to. It's a distraction from my goals and people can be so small. So I'm going to keep this brief and for my communication this month, I'll share some clips from Christy's reading. The accusations that are flying are horrendous and disgusting. They do nothing to support the search for justice and if anything, paint my dad in a worse light. It's no secret that he was no saint and I'm transparent about that for good reason. I cannot sit here and tell lies but expect detectives to be truthful with me. My dad struggled and things were not always perfect but he was my dad and he knows that as well as I do.

May 1, 2022

Wildflowers

I want to write a story and paint a picture for you so stick with me for a minute or two. 

Every year as a teenager my grandma, mom, and I would go to a farm in Cranston to pick out flats of flowers. It would be an all morning affair. I mean, we'd pick out colors and flower types just to go back and do it again like three more times. We'd load up the trunk and get them back to the house where we'd spread them across the porch and front driveway. They would sit for about a week until Ma decided it was time. It's important to remember that I struggled greatly after my dad died. I was told I was depressed (yeah, probably) and suffering from PTSD (I believe it) so a lot of days were really difficult. You can imagine it was tough to get out of bed a lot of days. I just told myself if I couldn't show up for myself, I had to show up for those around me.  And once she decided, it didn't matter what I had going on - boyfriend, friends, school, homework, I'm pretty sure I even called out of work on one or two occasions - it was time to plant.

It would start around 9 am and she would sit in the shade while I tilled the dirt from the previous season. She'd go through the flats, pairing up the different colors. By 10 am I would be covered in a thin layer of sweat and dirt but still we worked. I have a massive bug phobia and you can also imagine how many I encountered in our front garden. Nevertheless, we persisted. Ma would start somewhere in the beds, tossing each individual flower into a spot for me to dig and plant. By noon I would be dehydrated and wondering if I could go on but nevertheless, we persisted. After about half of the flats were planted - you guessed it - Ma would say it didn't seem right and I'd dig them back up. Now completely covered in dirt, I'd agree wholeheartedly. Whatever my family wants, my family would get. I would see it through for them even if I couldn't see things through for myself. Finally by about 7 or 8 that night the plants would all have a home. I'd be past exhausted, deliriously tired but nevertheless, we persisted. They'd be freshly watered, spaced perfectly apart, Miracle Grow sprinkled just so, and we'd sit on the porch for just a minute with a cool ice coffee. I would leave the gloves and shoes outside, carefully making my way to the bathroom. That shower I would take would be my favorite of the entire year. To wash away the anxiety that kept me from digging with the worms, the depression that kept me out of the sunlight so many days, the tired that only came when I gave life my all - that was a feeling. My grandma passed away almost 7 years ago and I haven't had one of those days since she left us. Now at my own home I started turning the dirt this weekend to prepare for the flats that are coming. 

Pursuing my dad's case is a lot like flower planting day. I am sad and anxious. I am tired. I keep working and working, overturning the dirt but I don't feel like I'm making progress. We move the spots we're looking, take a step back to see if it makes sense, then work it out again. I'm covered in dirt, grime, sweat, tears, and blood. When all this is over - when an arrest has been made, when departments have finally classified it a murder, when I have apologies so well deserved - it will be the best shower of my life. I will wash all of this away (and probably, finally, allow myself to have a good long cry). Until then, nevertheless, we persist. 

April 19, 2022

Grief

 Living with grief is a complicated process. I have been able to (successfully) put the past behind me and focus on today each day I wake up. I often tell people today is a good day because I woke up this morning and that's the truth. I'm thankful for every second I get on this beautiful earth. We celebrated Easter this past weekend and my heart exploded watching everyone, big and little kids alike, run around my backyard looking for eggs. I am thankful for every second I spend side by side with my husband even if we're both reading or on our phones. I'm thankful for these seconds that my dad did not get. As I (RAPIDLY!!) approach my 30th birthday I am somber with the thought that for my dad's story, it ended too soon.

My mom and I were talking this weekend about my dad's last Easter here on this earth. We were laughing - how he said he was "ready for a hearty meal" or something along those lines. A real foodie, my dad loved a good dinner. For her, the laughter turned to quiet tears. We talked about how she worked so hard all those years ago to pursue justice but there were things in the way - the police, family, and then just life. At some point she had to move on and take care of me, something she did selflessly and flawlessly. I didn't realize, almost two years ago now, that when I opened this proverbial can of worms I would affect so many people, sending so many small ripples. 

As for the case, I'm working still. When Cranston Police tell me they are not 'actively investigating' or someone will magically come forward soon - I don't accept that. Cases do not get solved by being passive. Nothing in this world comes to those when passive. Recently, I've sat in additional meetings with stakeholders who have skin in the game. I've stared back at men who are expecting me to back down but I have yet to shrink. I can imagine the conversations at the station - another record request, what is she thinking, we did everything we could; what more does she expect, it was an overdose, he had a seizure, she needs to move on. Not today, my good friends, and not anytime soon. 

As a rule, I don't make 'promises'. At work, you will never hear me promise anyone anything. I don't make them at home either. It's nearly impossible to keep a promise. BUT I can promise I will not stop finding new avenues to pursue, records to request, dots to connect, or questions to ask for my DAD. There is a reason I am who I am. I am aggressive, hungry, and relentless. I am my father's daughter. So to the men expecting me to back down, you will need to stand taller to look me in the eyes to tell me to move on. 

March 4, 2022

The Letter that Started it All

Beginning in May 2019, I have submitted close to ten records requests to the Cranston Police Department. It started as a large request. I wanted any and all documents pertaining to my dad's case. I was turned down immediately. I modified my request and just wanted the 911 call and report from July 22, 2006 when my dad was found unconscious in his basement apartment.  Again, I was denied but filed an appeal. I received a letter from Colonel Michael Winquist that set a lot of my work in motion. In part, he stated "The fact that many questions remain concerning what led to your father's demise is not lost on the many detectives. who worked diligently on the investigation..." He went on to explain he was again, denying my appeal for access to the records as "the documents contained therein are related to an open investigation of a potential crime." Further, Colonel Winquist writes "...there is nothing to suggest that your father was a victim of a homicide..."

I have questions. I have lots of them. I hope the irony of Colonel Winquist's letter isn't lost on all of you. I cannot have the records as they are part of an open investigation but there is nothing in those records to suggest my father was murdered (therefore - what is the potential crime?). Even more so, he claims the investigation is open but there is NO work actively being done on my father's case. To clarify, the only work being done is the work that I am doing.

I sat quietly for a short time after I received that letter. Attached to it, the Chief provided me with a mostly redacted arrest report for the persons of interest from the day after my dad passed (July 26, 2006). The arrest is for domestic violence.

I received one more document from the Cranston Police (after lots of asking and letters). The document I received is the narrative report from Officer Sean Parker when he responded to the scene on July 22, 2006. In part, he writes that he was dispatched to the apartment for a male "having a seizure not cooperating with the CFD". He goes on to record "Shawn appeared to be conscious and [I] did not see any marks or injuries on him." Additionally, Officer Parker recorded that the interior of the apartment appeared to be "neat and orderly". 

Since receiving these sparse documents, I have requested numerous additional documents. I have requested any calls involving Sean Parker - denied. I have requested any calls to 143 and 145 Pleasant St for the two years prior to my dad's death - denied.  I have most recently requested any and all documents in the file with correspondence between the department and medical examiner. Also note that prior to my father's death it was not department policy (nor the norm in any jurisdiction) to send  police presence to medical call. I requested that Cranston Police provide me with audio and/or transcript of the dispatch call requesting police presence when the EMTs and CFD arrived on scene. 

I consider myself a reasonable person. I won't ask for information that I don't believe I should have access to. I don't think it unreasonable to be transparent with me. What I do believe to be true is that the department made a number of mistakes that constitute gross negligence on their part when it comes to my father's homicide. I do believe the department doesn't want to admit fault or work any harder than they believe they already have. This is someone's life we are talking about and I will not stop advocating for what I believe to be right. 

January 23, 2022

Thank you

I cannot even begin to express the gratitude I am full of. Please don't confuse my sporadic blogging for being absent. There have been so many things in the works that I find it overwhelming to come back to this place and who I am when I think about my dad.

First, I want to thank Marc Hoover from Catch my Killer Podcast for allowing me to tell my dad's story. If you haven't heard that episode yet it is linked on our front page. I also want to thank Danelle Hallan for taking my dad's story and telling it so beautifully - probably better than I have been able to myself. That story is also linked on our front page and I'm including the link here. Set aside 45 minutes of your day and listen. I also need to thank Kylie Low of Dark Downeast. We spoke last week and some tears were shared. That podcast will be out in about a week. That will be linked on our front page when it becomes available. 

Thank you for all of your support. Whether you have joined our Facebook page, donated to our GoFundMe, reached out to me with words of support and encouragement, I am thankful to each of you. 

I have more work to do in the coming weeks. I am working closely with a colleague to get some crewnecks made since it is way to cold to wear our Justice for Shawn t-shirts here in RI! We're also working on a way to get more information about the case our to you. If any one has video/sound editing experience, shoot me a text or email. 

November 11, 2021

The last time

November 2, 2021

Ownership

October 15, 2021 

Introduction