Dr. Tasha Eurich, an organizational psychologist and leadership expert, presents a compelling case for the value of self-awareness in a world that often encourages self-delusion. Drawing on extensive research, case studies, and her own experiences, she provides practical insights and strategies to help readers develop a deeper understanding of themselves.

The book tackles various aspects of self-awareness, including understanding our emotions, recognizing our strengths and weaknesses, understanding how others perceive us, and gaining insight into our behaviors and motivations. Dr. Eurich highlights the benefits of self-awareness, such as improved decision-making, stronger relationships, and increased effectiveness as leaders and individuals.


Insight The Power Of Self-awareness In A Self-deluded World Pdf Download


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The book also addresses common barriers to self-awareness, such as fear, ego, and social pressures, and provides strategies to overcome them. Dr. Eurich emphasizes the importance of ongoing self-reflection and seeking feedback from others to gain a more accurate understanding of ourselves.

"A stranger approaching you in the street will in a second's glance see you whole, size you up, place you in a way in which you cannot and never will, even though you have spent a lifetime with yourself . . . and therefore ought to know yourself best of all." - Walker Percy

There's an old science-backed adage that the words of a drunk person are the thoughts of a sober one. Late one Saturday night in a crowded hometown bar, I recently learned just how true this really is.

It all began, innocently enough, in a trendy restaurant in downtown Denver. My husband and I, along with six of his oldest friends, had just had a magnificent meal with a surplus of food and wine. Despite the fact that I (as designated driver) had been soberly sipping club soda, I was in a wonderful mood. I'd known everyone around the table for more than 10 years, and it was just one of those nights when everything clicked. My friends were at their witty best and my stomach was sore from laughing. When the check came, we decided we were having far too much fun to go home.

An hour later, my already intoxicated friends had been quickly overcome with an even more intoxicating level of nostalgia. (The Celtic, it turned out, was where they used to hang out more than 20 years earlier.) We pushed a few high-top tables together, and with loud music blaring in the background, they began to reminisce. I chuckled to myself, picturing these now buttoned-up, middle-aged professionals engaging in youthful shenanigans.

As we broke into smaller conversations, Teresa pulled her chair closer to mine. "Tasha," she said dreamily, "we are so glad Dave brought you into our lives." How lovely! I thought, feeling equally grateful that he had brought them into mine. But before I could respond, she continued, "And boy have you come a long way since we first met you."

Once I composed myself, I recognized that this was a true alarm-clock moment that actually presented a valuable opportunity. That opportunity, I hoped, would be to prove that Teresa didn't know what the hell she was talking about. But either way, I had to probe further.

He paused for a moment and began, "Yeahhh . . . I can see where she's coming from." I bit my tongue and took a deep breath as he continued. "I mean, remember when you asked for a hard-walled office after you'd been in your job for less than six months?"

At the time, I'd been of the staunch opinion that it was totally unfair that all of my peers had offices and I didn't. But suddenly, I saw things from another perspective: there I was, newly hired Dr. Smarty Pants, demanding an office like a petulant child. Now, in retrospect, I could see how this must have come across. And I was mortified.

If internal self-awareness means gaining insight by looking inward, external self-awareness means turning our gaze outward to understand how we are seen. And no matter how hard we try, we simply cannot do this on our own. Unfortunately, though, learning how others see us is usually thwarted by one simple fact: even the people we're closest to are reluctant to share such information. We might pick up an observation here and there (with or without the aid of lip-loosening booze), but without concerted effort to uncover it, we're usually not getting, as they say in the courtroom, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

In fact, we live in a world where people usually don't tell us the truth about ourselves. Stir in our uneasy reluctance to ask for it and we have a recipe for blissful ignorance. Indeed, for many people, the mere thought of finding out how others see us can conjure up many fears and insecurities ("You really do look fat in those jeans" or "Your presentation was incoherent and underwhelming" or "You were insufferably arrogant when you were 26"). Though finding out how others see us can be scary, intimidating, or downright painful, it's far, far better than the alternative.

When you and your unintentional accessory enter the conference room, your client smiles bemusedly, and also stays mum. Then, despite an otherwise successful meeting, she concludes that you're scatter-brained and slovenly and decides not to give you more of her business. If just one of your co-workers had pulled you aside, you'd have been spared the whole embarrassing and costly ordeal.

Of course, that was an intentionally ridiculous example, but the truth is that whether it's a gruff managerial style, poor people skills, a tendency to stutter when nervous, or something else, we all have some kind of metaphorical toilet paper stuck to our shoe. And more often than not, we are the last to see it.

Yet given all this, it's still tempting to think that we know us better than anyone could ever know us (after all, we live with ourselves every day, right?). To use a metaphor from earlier in the book, when we see our reflection in a mirror, it's easy to conclude that this is the only, and therefore the most accurate, representation of ourselves. It's far easier and safer to gaze at our reflection than face the possibility that others might not see us the same way. But gazing inward is a necessary but not sufficient condition for true insight.

When I'm speaking to managers in organizations, I'll often ask, "Who is con dent that your employees have the same opinion about your leadership as you do?" About half the hands go up. So I up the ante. "Keep your hand up if you'd bet your retirement savings on it." At this point, I usually see a lot of pensive looks, and most people tentatively lower their hands. But when I ask whose opinion is "correct" (theirs or their employees'), perhaps because they want to seem more self-aware, many confidently shout out "My employees'!" Unfortunately, the answer isn't that simple. Just like we can't glean total insight just from gazing at our own reflection, looking at ourselves only through the eyes of others doesn't show us the complete picture, either.

A better metaphor for complete self-awareness than a mirror might therefore be a prism. As you may remember from elementary school science class, when you shine a white light into a prism, it comes out the other side in the form of a rainbow. Indeed, every time we seek a new perspective on how someone sees us, we're effectively adding another color to the picture. Instead of just looking at a at white light, we begin to see ourselves in a richer, more complete and multidimensional way.

When you learn what other people think of you, they're holding up their mirror, which may have a different reflection than your mirror. All of our realities are a bit different, but it doesn't mean that any one of them is the reality.

In this chapter, you'll learn a few approaches to help you get honest, actionable feedback and develop a richer picture of how you are seen by others. First, we'll explore the two biggest barriers to developing external self-awareness. Then I'll show how to tackle these obstacles using three methods to help you seek the right kind of feedback, both at work and in your personal life.

Imagine that you've been recruited to participate in a study on consumer preferences. When you arrive in the lab, you're mildly amused to learn that you'll be providing your opinions about men's deodorant. The researcher, let's call him Dr. Rosen, leads you to a table with various brands, grandly announcing that today, you'll be evaluating each one on several factors like color and odor. Dr. Rosen finishes explaining the task, thanks you, and leaves the room.

Chances are that the following scenario sounds a bit more familiar. Barb is making a presentation to her team on a new, clearly ill- conceived initiative. When she finishes, the room is surprisingly silent, save a few unconvincing utterances of "Good job," "Nice plan," and "Can't wait to hear more." Later that day, the unofficial meeting after the meeting (sans Barb) takes place, where her team discusses, often unkindly, what they really thought of her presentation. This scenario is all too common because, despite modern organizations' lip service to things like feedback and performance management, very few people actually get timely, honest opinions about how they're doing.

After her time in Puerto Rico, Eleanor and her team were bidding on another large water-infrastructure program. When she learned they'd been named one of the two finalists, her first thought was, Oh no . . . I have to make a presentation during the final interview. But she prepared and delivered it as best she could, and even remembers feeling uncharacteristically calm afterward.

That is, until a few days later, when she received a totally out-of- the-blue call from a colleague to express her condolences that they'd lost the project. Whispering, she asked Eleanor, "So what happened in that interview?" Eleanor told her that the presentation had gone ne. "Well, that's not what Phil told me," she replied, "He said it was horrible!"

For Eleanor, Phil's white lie was an alarm-clock event that catalyzed a critical insight. With the realization that just casually asking "How did I do?" isn't enough, she's since made the commitment to proactively seek specific and focused feedback from people who will tell her the truth. And she's grown by leaps and bounds as a result: as just one example, as the CEO of global non-profit Water for People, Eleanor recently gave a phenomenal TEDx Mile High talk that would have made poor Phil's head spin! It seems that nowhere is the adage "You don't get what you don't ask for" more true than when it comes to seeking the truth about how others see us. 152ee80cbc

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