IT'S NO LAUGHING MATTER

Link to order the novel-: It's No Laughing Matter: healing fiction eBook : Blitz, Gordon: Kindle Store 

  SYNOPSIS

Discover what is the impact of growing up in a household where laughter is forbidden. Wade and Brenda grew up in this environment. This restricted childhood stunted their emotions and social skills. Wade convinced himself that having a sense of humor was frivolous. He pursued a career as a mathematician, a dry profession, until he found the benefits of expressing joy later in life. All it took was being trapped in an elevator for four hours with another man! One can learn a lot about oneself (and about that other man) in all that time! Brenda, on the other hand, went overboard wanting to become a world-class comedian. She pursued the life of stand-up comedy, and along the way, she got herself kidnapped and thrown into a cellar! She learned a lot about her kidnapper in all the time that she was tied up and left in the dark. Ultimately, It’s No Laughing Matter takes the reader through a series of harrowing adventures and comes full circle to the realization that there is great therapeutic value in laughter. In fact, there is great therapeutic value in being able to express the full gamut of emotions available to us as expressive human beings.

EXCERPT FROM IT'S NO LAUGHING MATTER-WRITTEN BY  GORDON BLITZ:

Prologue:

            As Wade took the elevator to the sixty-ninth floor, his nervousness kept building as he passed each floor.  And listening to the elevator music of “Laughter in the Rain” by Sedaka and “Laughing” by The Guess Who only added to his anxiety.  This second interview as a tax consultant should have tamped down his stress after being told by one of the CPA partners, “Wade, we’ve whittled down our selection, and you’ve made the cut.”  His grades were impeccable, and he nailed his CPA exam on the first try. Wade skipped a grade in high school and fast-tracked his college years from four to three. The 150-hour requirement for CPA licensure was accomplished by mentoring at Whitney/Ruby in the summer, the same firm he was applying to today as a Tax Accountant. But now his underarms were sweating, and he worried it would seep through his jacket. The record heat and humidity were trying to sabotage his potential job. This was Los Angeles, not the East Coast where humidity was the norm. And who could have imagined a skyscraper in downtown Los Angeles? Weren’t they afraid of earthquakes?

            Then Wade got distracted by his new Florsheim lace-up shoes, not broken in yet. That classic look caused classic pain!

            Oh god, why were there mirrors here? It was disconcerting having his image staring back at him. He could never understand narcissism; being so much in love with yourself. All he saw were his flaws. Ears that looked like they belonged on an elephant, for example. When he had asked to have them pinned back, his father had said, “They only do that for children five and six years old. You inherited this from your mother’s family. Just grow your hair long. No one will notice them.”

            Damn, this elevator was slow. And to add to the turtle pace, the lights for every floor of the building were lit. The elevator doors would open, wait for a minute, and then close. No new passengers. Wade hoped he would make his nine o’clock appointment on time.

            Wade had an elevator companion, and he was jealous of him. The young man wore a one-piece white garment that came down to his knees, a large belt and Greek sandals.  It would no doubt make him feel cool, but it was an odd combination, like a costume for Halloween or something worn by an extra in a movie. Wade was baffled. Why was the man smiling? He had pushed the button for the next floor after Wade’s, obviously not his competition. He looked younger than Wade. At least he was not showing off muscles in his arms and legs. Just an average build. But those damn teeth and the way his smile filled his face added to Wade’s anxiety. As though that one feature made the man a winner. Must be an airhead!

         Wade on the other hand could not smile even if he wanted to. That inability could be the downfall of his job. But he rationalized that a tax consultant did not need a sense of humor, let alone be able to laugh. The kind of gravitas Wade would bring to his job should be more than enough. Really, was there any advantage in having a sense of humor? Wade felt that humor was used to disguise pain and unhappiness. A sort of coping mechanism or some stupid way to diffuse a volatile situation.

         In school, Wade had witnessed students getting harassed and trying to make jokes. Thank god, he had never gotten bullied. One of the few blessings of his childhood. Being brainy had brought him riches. He had started tutoring in high school. And he never just solved algebra problems or deciphered themes in To Kill a Mockingbird. Wade actually taught classmates to think for themselves. He gave them the skills to conquer biology and chemistry. And no one ever complained, “Oh, Wade is no fun. Takes everything so seriously.”

            Oh, god! Wade felt a bead of sweat dribbling from his forehead.  With no handkerchief or tissue, where was that droplet going to land? What were the chances that his companion could help? Wade still asked, “Hey, do you happen to have a tissue?”

            Amazingly, the man opened his shoulder bag and gave Wade a small packet of tissues.

            “I always carry these around for emergencies.”

            “Thanks.”

            “I have a whole array of items I keep in this bag. Mints and chewing gum. You should try one.  Leftover habit from when I smoked. I quit six months ago. People were always complaining about that smoky smell. Now they come in handy for bad breath. And I also have this spray and cloth to clean my glasses.”

            An implication that Wade might have sour breath forced him to ask, “Can I have one of your mints?”

            “Sure thing.”

            Wade pondered whether his own glasses were smudged. After receiving one of the curiously strong mints, Wade worried about sharing a space with a smoker, even an ex-smoker! Ugh! Well, this boy had saved the day. Wade quickly wiped the sweat from his nose. Disaster averted. That perspiration could have ruined his tie and his starched white shirt. And he had oily skin. Thank goodness he had used Gentle Breeze Soap this morning on his face. Without that treatment, calamity surely would have occurred.