There are moments in life that seem irreversible. Breakups are usually one of them. Because when we break up with someone, we do it with the firm conviction that it will be forever. In the same way, when they leave us and we leave behind the usual period of denial, we accept that, most likely, it is also a process without going back. But the mathematics does not agree. So, how to get your ex back? According to a study published in the Journal of Adolescent Research, almost 50% of young people start asking the same question: how to get my ex back? and want their ex to return to their partner in the two years after the breakup. But what can we do to promote reconciliation?
In the first place, and according to the clinical psychologist, specializes in romantic relationships, explains in Psychology Today, we must know the answer to how to get my ex back question which is getting back on our feet. The specialist uses real experience with a patient to illustrate this point well: "Getting back on your feet implied reconnecting with old friends and seeking interests in activities that she enjoyed. She remembered the sports activities that in better times she used to enjoy and did those activities again. again. Little by little, his spirit rose.
The second step in How to get my ex back? is to list the other person's complaints. See with real perspective what led him to move away from us. Hearing it increased his agitation and anguish rather than lead him to learn. Now he decided to address those complaints by writing as much as he could remember. Information is power. ", Heitler tells in detail. After all, it wouldn't be very productive to win back your ex-girlfriend/boyfriend without knowing in depth what caused the breakup.
Once the mistakes made, often linked to certain betrayals, are understood, and as explained in Cosmopolitan by a professor of relationship psychology at the University of Toronto, we must evaluate whether the problems that caused the breakup are truly correctable. The expert considers that other disagreements related to values can be incorrigible. It is a personal task that we must do. And with complete honesty.
Do you think there is real hope in how to get my ex back? Have you understood what those mistakes were, your responsibility for them, and are you willing to solve them to win back your ex? Well, experts recommend making a sincere approach in which the intentions of how to get my ex back? are expressed.
Sort your problems so you can make your ex want you back and realize that you have thought it through and that it is not a decision. spontaneous, "say experts. Finally, and in case your ex wants you back to give you another opportunity, comply with the promised changes.
In addition to the 5 essential steps, there is some important information if you want to establish the relationship again and want to solve this question in your mind about how to get your ex back. These are some tips below:
If your ex tries to contact you on a frequent basis, give him a bit of your time so that he/she notices that you are interested in getting back with him/her but never telling him/her directly until you verify that he/she loves you too.
You can do meditation when you feel those moments of anxiety about being with your ex to help you live in the moment longer and get away from those bad feelings.
When you are making the first contacts to propose to be him/her friend, do not even mention him/her old relationship in any way. This could help you to find answers to how to get your ex back.
If he/she also wants to get back with you and they don't know what to do with the problems they have, couples therapy is always a good healthy option to help them.
You should never change the person you are to please your ex but only try to overcome the problems that you yourself consider that do not let you be with him/her.
If you have already taken into account the tips mentioned above, you would like to know what are the most common mistakes that can scare your ex.
The first mistake to avoid when you are finding a solution for how to get your ex back? Despite the pain or resentment you may feel about your breakup and you want to communicate it to your ex, in no way, and under no circumstances should you suffocate him/her by sending messages or calling on the phone at all times. It is a fact that this will only make him/her move further away from you by feeling pressured and making you look desperate.
One of the things that you cannot do even if they are killing your desire to be with him/her, is to go beg your ex to come back with you or go there telling your ex closest friends or family how much you miss him/her and how much that pain hurts. breaking off. This only leaves you in a very humiliating situation for you and will not change your feelings at all, in fact, it will make you look very bad. Remember that no one should beg for love.
Another thing that makes you feel very suffocated is the fact that you remind your ex and repeat that no one is going to love him/her like you do, thinking that this will make your ex have to return with you necessarily. No, he/she already knows how much you love him/her, you must think in these moments that many times the reasons for ending a relationship have nothing to do with the fact of not feeling loved.
You should never lose your cool no matter what the situation is, especially if it is when your ex is dating someone else. Thinking that he/she is doing it can be a very painful idea but you should also keep in mind that your ex is probably doing it to get over his/her old relationship with you and when your ex realizes this fact he/she will understand that he/she should never have separated from you at the time. That is when you must evaluate and check the "really should I get back with my ex and if it is really with you with the person he/she wants to be; remember that we all make mistakes.
Another situation that can be quite humiliating for you is to let him/her understand that you are willing to do whatever it takes to get your ex back, that you can even put who you are and what you want to give you his/her love. This will only cause your ex to lose all the respect he/she ever had for you and put yourself in a position of inferiority to your ex that you should never take.