Raleigh

Jul 1, 2022

Today The Governor of the Commonwealth of Greater Appalachia is hereby announcing his bid to run for a third term. Being Governor of this Commonwealth has been the privilege of a lifetime, and it is such a privilege that I will not leave this position. I am going to be Governor for all long as you'll keep me, and I know that the people of this Commonwealth love me, and I love them, so lets keep the good times rolling. We have seen an unprecedented era of peace and tranquility in the Commonwealth over the course of my second term. No nonsense, no controversy, no corruption, just a well oiled machine doing the job it was elected to do.

We are a boring state, we are not a bad one. Old people come here to retire because of our wonderful climate and knowledge that we will treat them well. Young people come here because of opportunity and our great education system. Nobody wants to rock the boat, there's no need for a transfer of power that may result in any unnecessary issues. Who are your options? Serious question. The Greens are gone and the GAGOP is dead. Your only option is to continue to good times.

This will not be an exhausting campaign season. You won't have to see grating attack ads or boastful campaign material pretending some new guy can fix every issue like your cat is stuck in a tree. Just come out on Election Day and vote for normalcy and calmness. God bless our troops, God bless America, and God bless the Commonwealth of Greater Appalachia.

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