INDEX

Perfectionism: Perfectionism. It is the single biggest hurdle for many gifted people to get over in order to even begin something. By the time my daughter started showing signs of perfectionism-related hesitation, I had been reading and writing about giftedness for a few years. Armed with knowledge, I decided that I would not insist she plow ahead nor would I put the screws to her to "get over it." Instead, I used these two strategies: Noticing the Perfect Try and Celebrating the Perfect Product.

So I didn't shy away from her sense of perfectionism; I fed it.

2e - Dyslexia: Dear Senator, I am writing to you to at the request of a local advocate for dyslexic kids. We met at an event coordinated by Hillside School and she encouraged me to share my story with you. This is about my experience with the local school district.

The Stranglehold of Distrust: This is what I observed when my daughter, Tinkerbell, attended 1/2-day kindergarten at our neighborhood public school. Thinking back over her year, I remember three red flags that brought her down and, left unattended, would likely have grown into much more serious issues for her. These "red flags" also might shed light on what plagues many young people these days.

Cultivate this One Thing: My single best piece of advice? For homeschooling? For parenting? For working with 2e kids?

Cultivate patience.

In this marathon called homeschooling, there are no quick fixes. Across the board, in every aspect of your life, things will be made easier by your patience. What follows are two lists: a list of the places where you'll need patience, and a list of practices for how to cultivate it.

Rabbit Hole: "Hello down there?!" The sound gently bounces off the walls, echos fading into a soft inquiry.

Before responding I pause. The tunnel I'm in is beautiful - smooth curves of sandstone layered on itself suggest magic, mathematics, and marvelous natural mysteries. My children are nearby, exploring tunnels of their own. My son has his Minerals book open to match what he sees in the cave to pictures in the book. My daughter has two dolls and she is pretending they are on an adventure of their own. Each of us is immersed in the experience of exploring the maze we're trying to navigate without a map.

Why Fidget Toys Don't Work: Fidget toys solve the wrong problem.

BOOK REVIEW of "Differently Wired: Raising an Exceptional Child in a Conventional World" by Deborah Reber

• This is the book I wish I had read when I was getting started on this journey of parenting a 2e child. With diagnosis comes a lot of books "about your child" but not so much "for parents."
• Whether you're new to the world of Differently Wired Kids or an old hand, this book is for you. New folks will have a brief primer on common diagnoses and welcoming support for their role moving forward. Old hands will find encouragement, insights, and the support of a kindred spirit. Both will be empowered by the small ways you can Tilt to make everything better...amazing even.
• Read Differently Wired with a pencil, a highlighter, and some sticky flags.

The One Thing I Wish I Had as the Parent of a Gifted Toddler: There is one thing I wish I had had as a parent of a gifted toddler: a robust and unfailing practice of self-care.

Fostering Self-Discipline: Authoritative parenting, I think, is a way to foster what I want to see in my children: self-discipline. But what does that look like in our family? Below are four things that I use to guide me as I foster self-discipline.

10+ Free Resources for Homeschooling: When my husband and I decided to homeschool we made a decision. It was a commitment to a modest life - comfortable and privileged but modest. My husband would remain in his career; I would forgo mine. Well...maybe forgo isn't the right word. I had to reimagine what my career would have to look like. However you cut it our decision meant that we would have to homeschool without oodles of money to invest in curriculum.

This blog is about our most-used and favorite resources that support learning that don't cost a dime.

Subjects include: Reading, Communication, Music, Foreign Language, Math, Science, Computer Coding, Art, and more!

Micro Lesson in Decimals: Over the course of the week I monitored Tigger's temperature. He would cringe away when I brought it toward his ear. We worked together to place it and hold it in place until the small beep sounded to notify us that the reading was complete. Then I would read the numbers and announce them: "103.5" "Holding steady at 103.5." "101.5." "Holding steady at 101.5." "You're down to 99.1!"

It was when the fever came down to 99.1 degrees that he finally murmured, "I don't quite get the 'point one' part of that. What does it mean?"

And a Micro Lesson was born.

Upside Down: It wasn't until his developmental pediatrician asked, "Does he always do this?" that I realized that Tigger's way of being upside down was out-of-the-ordinary. I looked at my son resting upside down on her couch - heading dangling off the seat, feet resting at the top of the chairback. Then I realized all the ways this child had been upside down...

A tunnel and the light at the end of it: My children are mere elementary schoolers but we have come to the light at the end of a tunnel. It is among the first tunnels we've traversed as a family and deserves a small celebration. It is the story of how a gifted child learned to read..."late."

My Journey Among Checklists and Labels: Rest assured that the tests are not arbitrary - the educational research community wrestles with all aspects of the tests from what topics to test to the language used to word the questions and answers and even cultural connotations implied in the text. By understanding this as well as the normal distribution for any given test, you can see that high-achievers are rare; gifted persons are rarer still. The degree to which you agree with the 2-standard-deviation cut-off to label someone as "gifted" (and the 3-standard deviation cut-off for the "profoundly gifted" label) is up to you.

Most importantly, though, is how the information is used.

Grace, Compassion, and Disaapointment: And then I realized, really realized, disappointment is a part of life. I realized that to live gracefully is to allow myself to be disappointed but not lash out to accuse someone else of being responsible for that disappointment.

Of course, the flipside of living with disappointment myself is to allow others their feelings.

We. Misunderstood.: In short, being misunderstood is something that arises because, as Stephen R. Covey so aptly pointed out, "Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply."

So then the best thing we can do prevent misunderstanding is to hold space with each other.

To truly support people in their own growth, transformation, grief, etc., we can’t do it by taking their power away (ie. trying to fix their problems), shaming them (ie. implying that they should know more than they do), or overwhelming them (ie. giving them more information than they’re ready for). We have to be prepared to step to the side so that they can make their own choices, offer them unconditional love and support, give gentle guidance when it’s needed, and make them feel safe even when they make mistakes.

It is so simple that it is almost like doing nothing except walking alongside me. You will hear about my good days and know I'm not bragging. You will bear witness to my bad days and know that I'm not a bad parent. And I will do the same for you. That is how we all will be less misunderstood.

Audiobooks 2017: One of the most frequently asked questions I see is about chapter book recommendations for young children. Since my children are not independent readers yet my husband and I read many aloud. But we also download audiobooks from the library or check out CDs. This is a list of audiobooks we enjoyed in 2017. Many of these books are recommended for older children than mine (who were ages 5 and 7) but we enjoyed them and you might, too. [It will be a running list until the end of the year.]

Three simple things to create a Minecraft-themed birthday party: You should know that I don't scour Pinterest for the perfect decorations. I don't orchestrate games. I've even almost given up entirely on party favors (almost). I'm, like, the worst party planner. I keep things simple and invite friends and family to a playground, sing happy birthday, serve pumpkin pie (the birthday boy's choice) and pizza, and let the children play.

HOWEVER, Minecraft's premise makes planning a themed party pretty simple. Just think "cube it" and you'll have just enough to make your child smile.

Differentiation: A Radical Solution to IEPs, 504s, ALPs, and the Drudgery of Accountability: Homeschool offers us the opportunity to teach and learn without IEPs, 504s, ALPs, and standardized tests. My children get to be their unique selves without the stigma associated with it. They get to pursue their interests, be curious, make decisions, and be productive members of the community early and often.

So it doesn't matter exactly how my children are different because I don't have to figure out a way to make them be the same as everyone else.

And yet, it matters entirely.

By recognizing the different ways my children are drawn to the world, I am able to be the facilitator they need.

An apolitical guide to gun safety for families: "Making safe spaces for them to explore and play freely is as important in early childhood and adolescence as it is in infancy. It includes locking medicine cabinets, keeping the kitchen safe, and, yes, guns out of reach. It also includes having open conversations about hard topics....made even harder by political and personal convictions. But just because it is hard does not mean that we don't have to do it."

Why sensory processing disorder makes everything so hard and a phrase to help make things easier: "Asking for help falls under Executive Function. A child will have to have Working Memory to recognize that they are struggling with something; he or she will have to have enough Mental Flexibility to imagine that someone else might be able to help, and then enough Self-Control to pause what they are doing, find someone how might help, and ask.

That seems like a tall order for a young child, made even taller by SPD. If their brains are not processing physical stimuli, then how can they properly assess the situation and their needs, let alone Working Memory, Mental Flexibility and Self-Control?"

There is no such thing as a reluctant learner: "We should all recognize when and why coercion is the force by which our child performs as a student compared to when and why our child shows us that he or she is a learner."