To you,
First of all, let me just say that I am quite happy that you made it to this point. Through all of the adversity you went through, self inflicted or not, that in it of itself is quite the accomplishment. For that alone I’d like to congratulate you on doing great things so far in your life. Only I wish you had taken longer to reflect on everything you’ve done in order to get where you stand today. I get that you absolutely hate talking about yourself, never mind highlighting anything you did. You never wanted the spotlight. The only thing you want is for a ray of light to shine on you every once in a while, just long enough to be noticed. But even then that was a rare occurrence unless you acted differently from your exuberant and caring self.
It’s been one hell of a ride that’s for sure. From the time you were born in the midst of a hurricane, you knew that you had a story to tell. Well not from the get go anyway. Your communication skills were quite lacking for the first few years of your life. Did that have an effect on your development? Maybe, but it was only a small setback at the start of your journey. From their you worked your butt off to learn something new everyday and possibly make a new friend in the process. You were one hell of a special kid, or at least that's what your momma said. Just some kind of awkward but you made it all work somehow.
During the next few years of your life you set goals for yourself. You did things that no one ever thought you would even attempt. And by doing so you changed the course of your childhood for the better. You might not have enjoyed every second of it but the good memories tend to outlive the bad. Through hard work and other positive character traits, you made it to where you stand. Was it always easy? Hell no. The only thing that matters is that you arrived right on time no matter what path you took to get here. I am proud of you for everything that you have done up until this point. I just know that you have so much more to offer the world. I just want you to be a better person first and foremost. Then I just hope that you can change at least one person’s life for the better. That’s all I ask.
The point of this list is quite simple. Continue doing the things that make you who you are and go outside of your comfort zone in order to become a better person one day at a time. I hope that something from this list of ‘wisdom’ I say here sticks and that you become a better person because of it. On that note, here you go:
1. Be yourself
This is pretty self explanatory, although it may seem cliche. You got this far, so why change who you are now? You ARE great, always remember that no matter what happens in the rest of your life.
2. Be willing to move on from things that do not give you joy anymore
This is going to be a tough pill to swallow. You always want to continue doing the things that once brought you the happiest moments in your life. You always want to stay in touch with people you feel deserve that. But there will come a point in your life where you will need to draw that line and move on to better yourself. Find that difference and be aware of the world around you.
3. Make sure family stays important in your life
Family is just something that you will want to have to fall back on when something goes wrong (because eventually it sure as hell could). Although you really can’t choose family, you can choose the amount of importance they take in your life. Always remember they had a large part in shaping your personality into what it is today.
4. But make time for friends when you need to
Don’t be so d*** antisocial all the time.
Go interact with your friends and make some memories that would have never happened otherwise.
5. Do what makes you happy
Life is too short to be drowning in your own sorrows doing things that don’t bring you some level of joy. Go out and make the difference that we both know you want to make and be happy again. There have been only a few moments where I have felt truly happy so far and I want you to have more of those opportunities.
6. Go outside your comfort zone every now and then
Again I hate to reiterate myself but I feel like you need to hear it. Go on an adventure and change up the status quo in your life. Go say yes to some crazy request and make memories that you will love to share with the next generation.
7. Take time for yourself
As much as I would love to see you out and about more, it is imperative that you take time for yourself. For your own health, just take a few moments every now and then to step away from the world and just think. Between school, work, friends, family and everything else that’s thrown at you I don’t even know how you find time to sleep, never mind think. But the best thoughts are found in silence. Use that to your advantage to find your way to make a difference in the world.
8. Don’t be afraid to have outward emotions
Right now you may think that you need to keep your self proclaimed ‘wall of emotion’ built as high as the sky. But it is definitely okay to show emotion and just cry it out. Life absolutely sucks and situations come up that bring out the worst facets of life. Trust me in the fact that you have had your fair share.
9. Take your own advice every now and then.
You would think after trying to help so many people get through things you’d start to catch on. Just stop being such a freaking hypocrite and go live your life how you wish you could.
10. Aim to laugh, think, and cry everyday
As Jim Valvano said if you have accomplished this then you have definitely lived a full day. Just appreciate all of the highs and lows in life and make the most of the time in between.
11. Give the same effort that you would expect to be reciprocated back in a friendship.
Don’t accept anything less than you are willing to give. The people whom you should have in your life will do that one thousand times over. BE friendly with the rest of the world because you never know when you will see them again in life. Your actions are often the thing people remember you by years later, not what you said to them. Remember to appreciate the people that you’ve surrounded yourself with
12. Cherish the beauty in life while you still can
This is so cliche so is so true. I cannot reiterate this enough but do not by any means let ANYTHING hold you. If doing something means something to you, get up off the dang couch and go freaking do it dude. Life is too short to push new adventures off in your life. Whether that be something as simple as meeting someone new or traveling across the world just do it. The worst that can happen is your told no, rethink your course of action, and try try again.
13. Don’t be afraid to show the world who you are
If the world does not accept you for who you truly are, well you might need to find another planet. But in all seriousness, go ahead and show more people who are. Take some baby steps in this department though. Don’t go and tell everyone your whole life story (because you know you hate when people do that).
14. Keep cracking jokes when the time is right 😂
Dude, you have a better sense of humor than you give yourself credit for. Just don’t quit your day job and become a comedian like your family suggests.
15. Choose your words carefully
What you say to people can truly have a lasting impact that can be irreversible. Be careful how you approach situations and be aware of who is around. You never know who is around and how they can change your life.
16. Ask for a hug when you need it
Life can be hard sometimes. At some point you just need to let all of your built up emotions out of your system. Find someone you love and trust and hug it out. No one should go through life alone and I hope you find someone to share it with.
17. Be willing to hear what you don’t want to
The only way to improve yourself sometimes is hearing the worst from the people you love the most. Be willing to adapt when you are made aware of the fact that you are doing something wrong. Don’t be afraid of failure, just be willing to learn from it is all.
18. Ask for what you want in life
The worst thing that can happen is that they say no and life goes on. Even then persistence is key so go rethink your approach and go for dream again. But if the answer is yes, then you will go far and the sky's the limit.
19. Live life to the fullest
Life is too short not to try and experience everything the world has to offer. Go out and live your dream. Go meet that stranger across the room. Who knows, they may be your long lost best friend from across the world.
20. Be the change that you want to see in the world
Finally, again stop being such a hypocrite and go live your own vision for life. It only takes one interaction to make an impact, so what the hell is stopping you from taking action? Self doubt is all. Just get over that hurdle in your mind and you will be golden.
If you have read everything up until this point, thank you. I hope future me takes this to heart 5 years from now. Or at least gets a few good laughs from past me. Always remember to be a good person. That I think you got down pretty well. But with everything in life there is always room for improvement.
In the end, if you are truly loved by the people that you have surrounded yourself with then you have made it in my opinion. If you truly love yourself, that’s just the frosting on the cake.
With Love,
T