The Worst Two Weeks

By: Emily Eade

Date: Fall Semester, 2020

There is this superstition that when you see a crow it’s a sign of death or someone is going to get very ill. I should have taken the three crows I saw days before as a warning for the next two weeks. Now you may wonder why the hell I’m talking about crows and superstitions. Well, here’s your answer. It all started in late July and I will have to say it was the worst two weeks of my life.

July 20th, I was at my aunt Michelle's house already not feeling the greatest so I walked to the pond across the street. I sat at my usual spot whenever I would go there. I put my phone under my leg. As I was staring into the dark murky water of the pond my phone started to vibrate. My mom was calling me and when I answered the call I heard the pain in her voice as if she'd been crying for a bit before she called me. It was bad news. My great aunt Barb had passed away. I knew this was coming. She had just turned 79 a month before and was diagnosed with brain cancer. It was hard knowing that a couple of months before this pandemic hit I was planning to go to California to visit her around this time and now she’s gone. I remember telling my dad and my cousin about my aunt’s passing and telling them not to tell my Aunt Michelle. I felt numb to the pain of my great aunt's death and knew Aunt Michelle would cause me to feel the pain. The day has ended.

July 21st, I woke up from a very short sleep at my grandparent's house and went home. Once I was home I started talking to my mom only to be told my great aunt’s nephew, Scotty, from her first marriage had passed. He had passed away in a car accident. I never got the pleasure of meeting Scotty, but I'm sure he was a great man. The day has ended and I still felt nothing as for emotion towards these deaths.

It’s the start of July 22nd and I woke up in my bed and went on my phone. I went through my apps Snapchat, Instagram, and Facebook. As I was on Facebook I saw my cousin posted something on her feed. My cousin Nick had passed. I had seen him a little bit before his passing at my cousin's graduation party. All I knew about him, was that he could brighten up the room by just walking into it. But as the saying goes ones with the brightest smiles hold the most pain. That was Nick, he had passed from his internal pain and had taken his own life. The day has ended. I felt a little pain but not too much.

When I found out about Nick's passing that’s when everything started to get more real to me. All I could think was ‘These people are gone. I will never see them again or have the chance to meet them or hear their voice.’,’ Why did this have to happen?’ and ‘Why is the universe trying to knock me down?’. I’m still only feeling a little pain toward these deaths.

July 23rd had passed and I thought that Nick’s passing was the end of it. But really it was just the start of what I thought was about to knock me down. The day had come to an end.

July 24th, I woke up to my cousin texting me freaking out. There was something wrong with my grandma. I couldn’t tell you all the medical terminology my cousin used. My heart sank. What else is the universe going to throw at me? Later that week I would only find out some horrible news. My grandma has colon cancer. The worst thing that could have happened had happened. This caused stress for me and my whole family. We didn’t know what to do. We didn’t even know what to say. We were all just broken. Then we figured we should get the colon resection done and hope the cancer is gone. Only to find out cancer got into the lymph nodes and traveled to her stomach. She only has a year to live. I’m back to feeling completely numb. The day came to a finish.

July 31st, prom night. I found out the three family members died on the same exact day, July 20th. I’ve been in a mood all day just stressed out about everything going on in my life. I snapped at a couple of friends earlier that day. I’m at my friend's house and everyone was playing truth or dare but me. I was just staring into the fire while listening to the same four Johnny Depp songs, which was the one thing that kept me from going completely psycho. When I didn’t feel numb anymore to the pain of my family's deaths and illnesses. This was when it all sunk in. I am hurting. My grandma is sick and is going to die. My aunt Barb is dead. My cousins are dead. I began to cry while staring into the fire finally feeling the pain and grief I was supposed to feel. The day had come to an end.

Days had come and gone and I thought this was finally over. No more pain, no more suffering my family was finally at peace. Then suddenly I get a call from my dad. My grandpa was rushed to the hospital that morning. He has congestive heart failure and wasn’t doing the greatest. More stress, more pain, more everything. The day came to a finish.

I haven’t felt this lost before. I had never really come out and told people I was sad or upset about what was happening. I never truly had time to come to peace and grieve the passing of my family members, I still haven’t. I would have moments where I feel the worst emotions ever, and have moments where I feel nothing at all. Since my grandparents came home I have had to live a good amount of my days with them. I had to help my family take care of them, they need 24/7 care and can’t be left alone. The two weeks may have been the hardest for me, but I’m still feeling the effects of them today. The two weeks had come to an end.