Watching Yang Xuan enter her son's room, Tang Xiaonian’s attention was turned completely away from the TV drama and she glanced at the closed door frequently. Seeing that Yang Xuan was not coming out, she took the remote control and turned down the volume of the TV, trying to listen to the movement in the room, but she couldn't hear anything after listening intently for a long time.
Tang Xiaonian put the remote control on the table. The melon seeds crackled, and she threw the melon seed skin in the palm of her hand towards the trash can at her feet. She stepped aside, ready to get closer and listen carefully. But just as she was about to lift herself up, the door was pulled open, and Yang Xuan immediately stepped out.
Tang Xiaonian had no choice but to sit back as if nothing had happened, pretending to watch TV seriously. When Yang Xuan returned to his room, as soon as the door closed, she immediately got up and went to Tang Junhe's bedroom. Without knocking, she turned the doorknob, pushed the door and walked in.
Tang Junhe was still in the same posture, lying on the bed, with his face buried in the pillow. When he heard the door being opened, he thought it was Yang Xuan who had come back. He looked back with a little surprise, and saw Tang Xiaonian’s long face.
"You don't study during the day, but instead lie on the bed and hatch chickens?" Tang Xiaonian asked bluntly with accusations, "Why did he come to you?"
Tang Junhe watched Tang Xiaonian approaching, bent down and grabbed the bag of medicine that Yang Xuan had just brought over. He felt flustered, his brain racing trying to come up with an excuse.
"He got this for you?" Tang Xiaonian read the words on the medicine boxes one by one, "Ibuprofen capsules, clindamycin... He also knows to bring antipyretics and anti-inflammatory drugs. When did he become so kind? What is this..." Tang Xiaonian picked up the ointment.
Tang Junhe's heart reached his throat, and he almost jumped out. He didn't know what ointment Yang Xuan had just applied on him, if its indication function was obvious...
"Erythromycin?" Tang Xiaonian muttered suspiciously, looked at Tang Junhe and asked, "Why did he buy this for you?"
"I don't know..." Tang Junhe said guiltily, "He just bought whatever."
Tang Xiaonian didn't believe it. She pulled up Tang Junhe's pajamas vigilantly, trying to see if there was any injuries on his back: "They didn't bully you last night?"
Tang Junhe immediately got up, stretched out his hand to pull down his T-shirt, and denied it: "No, I'm not a child."
"Then why did he get you anti-inflammatory ointment? He has so much money that there is no place to spend it?" Tang Xiaonian unscrewed the lid of the ointment to see, "Have you used it?"
A spark of inspiration flashed in Tang Junhe's mind, and he came up with an excuse to fool Tang Xiaonian: "He just got it for himself. His hand was injured."
Tang Xiaonian had to ask clearly: "How did he get hurt?"
"He was burned by cigarette smoke...on the palm of his hand." Tang Junhe reached for the ointment on her hand, "I'll give it back to him in a bit."
"If you don't tell me anything, you will be the one suffering in the end!" Tang Xiaonian frowned and glared at him, "I told you not to hang out with him all the time, do you want to suffer? Those who stay near vermilion get stained red, and those who stay near ink get stained black [1]. Smoking and drinking, you don’t look like a student, you always hang out with him, you have been led to the ruins! You are still lying in bed in broad daylight, and you don’t know how to study. This is your third year of high school..."
Listening to Tang Xiaonian's chatter, Tang Junhe got up from the bed, sat down at the desk and started doing the homework for the New Year's Day holiday. Seeing that Tang Xiaonian had achieved her goal, she finally stopped talking, opened the door and walked out. Before leaving, she muttered: "There is nothing to be courteous about, it's either adultery or robbery..." [2]
For two consecutive nights, Tang Junhe uncharacteristically did not try to go to Yang Xuan's room. He was not feeling well. He was waiting for Yang Xuan to come knock on his door, instead. His enthusiasm seemed to have been forced to a halt. A basin of cold water was poured on his head, and the few remaining sparks were half-lit and half-extinguished. They would be burning again when Yang Xuan was willing to come over. But Yang Xuan didn't do as he wanted; except for that time when he came to deliver the medicine, he never came again.
At the dinner table, Tang Junhe couldn't help observing Yang Xuan's expression quietly, hoping to see the slightest emotional fluctuation on his face, but Yang Xuan remained silent and indifferent as if nothing had happened. He always acted distantly anyway, he was used to presenting people such a face.
Tang Junhe secretly made up his mind that if Yang Xuan didn't approach him first, he would never go to Yang Xuan. This kind of situation requires some kind of response before it can go on... Tang Junhe was not a person who goes back on his word, but after reaching that decision, he had a rare case of insomnia that night.
He tossed and turned thinking about Yang Xuan. Even though they were still in the same family, and they still met several times a day, he felt that he hadn't been close to Yang Xuan for a long time. He missed Yang Xuan very much. I want to be close to him, to hug him, to kiss him. Once this kind of longing took shape, it was like a rising tide, surging up wave after wave, almost drowning him.
It was already two o'clock in the morning, and Tang Junhe still couldn't sleep. He sat up, and stared at the surrounding darkness with unfocused eyes. After a while, he got out of bed, put on his slippers, opened the door, walked out of his room and over to Yang Xuan's door.
It was so late, Yang Xuan should have already fallen asleep. Although he thought so, Tang Junhe still held the idea of giving it a try, and so he raised his hand and knocked on the door. His movements were very light, and the knock was very soft, but in the silent night, the sudden sound still surprised him.
For fear of waking Tang Xiaonian in the next room, he didn't dare to knock on the door anymore, but he didn't want to go back like this. Just staying at the door of Yang Xuan's room is better than lying alone in bed. He rested his hand on the wooden door, and his short nails scratched it unconsciously, making a slight noise.
Then the door actually opened.
Tang Junhe stared blankly at Yang Xuan who appeared in front of him, feeling that he was dreaming. He raised his hand and rubbed his eyes, only then did he dare to confirm that the person in front of him was indeed his brother.
"I thought a cat had entered the house." Yang Xuan, who was shirtless and only wore a pair of pajama pants, looked down at him and said, "What are you scratching the door for?"
"I didn't want to wake you up..." Tang Junhe was a little embarrassed, he didn't expect that Yang Xuan would really open the door for him.
Yang Xuan stepped aside to open the gap: "Coming in?"
"Yeah." Tang Junhe went inside.
As soon as Yang Xuan closed the door, Tang Junhe rushed over and hugged him. Yang Xuan was pushed back, and his younger brother's hair rubbed against his face.
Yang Xuan, pressed against the door by him, didn't break free, but asked, "Can't sleep?"
"Ge, did you do it with me because you like me?" Tang Junhe asked sullenly.
Yang Xuan didn't respond, and raised his palm to the back of his head.
Tang Junhe didn't get an answer, then asked: "Then do you hate me?"
Yang Xuan sighed almost inaudibly, and the air current made Tang Junhe's upturned hair sway softly. He said, "You are my younger brother, how could I hate you."
"But I don't want to be just your younger brother." Tang Junhe said.
Yang Xuan was silent for a while and said, "It's so late, go to sleep."
Tang Junhe still didn't move, just hugged him and tightened his arms. Yang Xuan wrapped his arms around his waist, and with some strength, lifted his feet off the ground. He took two or three steps like this, carrying him to one side of the bed, and then walked around to the other side and got on the bed.
Standing still, Tang Junhe was still debating on whether to get on bed or not. If he does, will they do that again? He likes the feeling of Yang Xuan entering him, but such an unclear relationship makes him hesitate.
"Not coming up?" Yang Xuan looked at him and asked.
These words brought him back to his senses. His brain hadn't made up his mind yet, but his body reacted first. He climbed onto Yang Xuan's bed, laid down and hugged him. Yang Xuan raised his hand and turned off the overhead light.
"Ge, were you sleeping just now?" Tang Junhe asked in the dark.
"Mn."
"Then how did you hear me knock on the door?"
"I didn't hear knocking." Yang Xuan laid on his back, closed his eyes and said, "I dreamt that a cat was scratching the door."
"That's not a cat, it's me." Tang Junhe said. He hugged his brother, and the tide in his heart calmed down a bit. Although his back was still aching, he still whispered: "Ge, let's do it..."
Yang Xuan didn't speak. Tang Junhe stretched out his hand and slowly moved down along his lower abdomen, but as soon as he touched that place, Yang Xuan grabbed his wrist and put it back to where it was before. He said without hesitation: "Sleep."
"But you obviously have a reaction." Tang Junhe muttered in a low voice, this discovery somehow made him a little happy.
Yang Xuan didn't speak again, just held his wrist, making him unable to move.
In fact, Tang Junhe didn't really want to do it, he just missed the feeling of Yang Xuan hugging him tightly. If they did it, Yang Xuan would hug him, maybe even kiss him.
But Yang Xuan refused him. He thought for a while, and under the dim light, supported by Yang Xuan's lower abdomen, he raised his upper body to give his lips a trembling kiss. But Yang Xuan stretched out his hand to hold his shoulder, and he was pushed back on the bed.
After being pushed back, Tang Junhe didn't continue to move. Yang Xuan didn't withdraw his arm, either, and they laid there hugging in that same position, with Tang Junhe’s hands still touching his neck.
Tang Junhe scooched closer to Yang Xuan. Surrounded by his brother's breath, he closed his eyes and fell asleep.
✈︎ ✈︎ ✈︎
After the New Year's Day holiday, the weather continued to be sunny for a few days. The second round of reviews of the third year of senior high school had come to an end, and exam season started. Everyone had a thick stack of test papers in front of their desks, held together by different colored clips organized by subject.
Since that night, Yang Xuan never contacted Feng Bo again, and Feng Bo's old text messages also received no response. After thinking about it, Feng Bo still came to Yang Xuan's desk during break, but with Tang Junhe sitting at the desk in front, he didn't directly explain why he came, and just called "Brother Xuan".
Sensing that he hesitated to speak, Yang Xuan raised his head to look at him, got up and said, "Let’s go out and talk."
As soon as they left, Tang Junhe looked up at Feng Bo's desk. The desk was separated from him by an aisle, three rows in front of him. After staring at it for a few seconds, he turned his gaze back to the test paper in front of him.
"Let's end that matter here." Coming to the corridor, Yang Xuan went straight to the point.
"How could it stop here?" Feng Bo didn't dare to refute directly, and said unwillingly with his face turned away, "That mother and son pair will live in your house for the rest of their lives."
Yang Xuan suddenly smiled and asked, "Why do you care more about my family than I do?"
Feng Bo was a little speechless, saying with uncertainty: "I, I can't understand it..."
"It's not just for this, is it?" Yang Xuan stared at him and asked meaningfully, "Did you buy that cigarette for me or for yourself?"
Feng Bo became anxious immediately: "Brother Xuan, what do you mean..."
Yang Xuan didn't play tricks, and made his intentions clear: "You've got too much control over this matter."
Feng Bo continued to speak stubbornly: "If it was someone else, I wouldn't bother to care so much."
"Don't touch him again." Yang Xuan looked at him and said, with a hint of warning in his tone.
"Understood." Feng Bo swallowed his anger. Naturally, he didn't dare to backtrack or spurn Yang Xuan’s words. He was the one who had witnessed Yang Xuan's fight, and Yang Xuan was the one who helped him.
They were still in the first year of high school at that time. Although he and Yang Xuan were in the same class, they were not very close — except for the brotherhood that developed with the dozen members of the basketball team after their time training together. Yang Xuan had never particularly liked him, and he would always talk to the other members instead.
Feng Bo had a good relationship with one of the members of the basketball team in junior high school. He used this to join them that afternoon and play a practice match in the gymnasium. After a match, people from No. 16 High School also came. They could see that they were here to make trouble. They left the empty field unused and insisted on arguing with a few people from No. 1 High School. It hadn’t been long since the city basketball league. During that tournament, people from No. 16 High School repeatedly fouled and charged players from No. 1 High School, and even hit one of the main players so hard that he had to leave midway with a broken leg. They won the championship by means of shady tactics.
This afternoon, a few people from the No. 1 High School were full of anger. It was not a formal basketball game anyway, and they played with no restraints. Compared to those competing in official championships, Feng Bo was an amateur. Not only was his skill level much lower than that of the players on the basketball team, but his body shape was also not comparable to any of them. He was knocked to the ground, and he yelled at the man who bumped him in anger: "Fuck, Gao Ze, you are a fucking mad dog!"
The boy from No. 16 Middle School named Gao Ze leaned down and grabbed him by the neckline, and his fist swung down at him with a punch. His yelling and screaming became the fuel to the fire, and the anonymity that had been simmering broke out into a group fight. Feng Bo was beaten to the ground and hugged his head, unable to fight back, but he refused to admit defeat, and continued to curse intermittently: "What damn son of a bitch gave birth to a mad dog like you?! How dare you come out to meet people, your mother is a scumbag, and she gave birth to you, a scumbag..." The harder the other beat him, the harder he cursed.
Later, when he was dragged out from under the man's fists and feet by Yang Xuan, he had already been beaten so badly that his nose was bruised and his face was swollen, and he was practically unrecognizable. Gao Ze was one of the main players in the city league who played against the No. 1 High School players, so Yang Xuan would naturally not just watch from the sides. This fight was quite fierce. Every punch of Yang Xuan was full of hostility, and each hit was precise, forcing Gao Ze to the corner. Feng Bo was stubborn, and refused to apologize and beg for mercy, holding back his energy and waiting for an opportunity to strike back. Feng Bo had been beaten into a bear-like face, but his spirit did not diminish. He stood aside and cheered for Yang Xuan: "Brother Xuan, come on, kill this bitch!"
The scene at that time was extremely chaotic. The owner of the basketball hall was unable to dissuade the fight, so he called the police. The brawl ended with more than a dozen people entering the game in a mighty manner. It started hastily and ended chaotically.
When the chauffeur Chen Xing went to the police station to pick up Yang Xuan, he immediately saw Feng Bo with a bruised nose and a swollen face. Feng Bo's father was a respectable businessman in Runcheng, so Chen Xing sold his favor and took him out with Yang Chengchuan's name.
After coming out, Feng Bo still didn't forget to thank Yang Xuan: "Brother Xuan, thank you for helping me beat up that son of a bitch today, just tell me if you need help in the future."
Yang Xuan didn't take his words seriously, but asked, "Do you know Gao Ze from No. 16 High School?"
"Ah," Feng Bo said with difficulty opening his swollen eyes, "he's my father's third son. Even though that crazy dog is taller than me, I'm his brother."
"What about your mother?" After a while, Yang Xuan suddenly asked again.
"My mother? My mother is living abroad," Feng Bo gasped in pain. "She can't control my father, and she doesn't want to. By the way, she doesn't even care about me. She's going abroad to live a good life by herself."
"It's good if you think about it," Yang Xuan said lightly at the time, "It's better than being pissed off."
✈︎ ✈︎ ✈︎ ✈︎ ✈︎ ✈︎ ✈︎ ✈︎ ✈︎ ✈︎ ✈︎
Translator Notes:
[1] "Those who stays near vermilion gets stained red; those who stay near ink gets stained black" 近墨者黑；Jìn zhū zhě chì, jìn mò zhě hēi. – an idiom meaning we take the color of our company.
[2] "Before leaving, she muttered, 'There is nothing to be courteous about, it's either adultery or robbery..." – I have no idea what Tang Xiaonian is talking about and how to phrase this better, I don't remember any of the characters committing robbery. Most likely she means that the Yang family stole her son.
Even back in Rimei's chapters, you may notice some discrepancy in how the translation refers to their schooling, from Middle School to High School. I'll try to keep it consistent from now on and refer to it as First High School, but in case I miss anything, just know that all of this happens during their last years of high school.
I had to take some serious liberties in interpreting a few of the sentences in this and following chapters, but the sentiment should be the same. I’m reminded that I do this so hopefully your head doesn’t have to hurt like mine :-)