Please reply to this message:
Maybe. I had a bit of a rough week. Grappling with health problems, triggered an existential crisis. Oh, highs and lows and depression and things contemplating existence. My blood pressure hit 170. Sometimes it feels impossible to relax or calm down.
It wasn't all bad though I delve into a bunch of creative projects. I played a lot of piano, learn several great new songs. I did a lot of artwork. And I did a lot of writing. I've been struggling with the existential concept of the existence of love.
In an attempt to understand life meaning and purpose.
Honestly, I have to say I’m hurt. I don’t really have much family anymore—aside from you and Aaron. I already know I can’t call you Monday through Friday, and I assumed Saturday you’d be tied up, so I reached out today, a day that feels family-oriented. When you told me you couldn’t even talk because it is family day, it stung.
You know I’m not a fan of texting, and in the hour or so we’ve spent going back and forth, we honestly could’ve just had a real 5 minute conversation. I reached out because I wanted to acknowledge you on Mother’s Day—not because you’re my mom, but because you matter to me as family. I wanted to offer something positive and meaningful.
I’m genuinely confused and feeling isolated. Right now, it honestly feels like you’re slipping into the same kind of distance I’ve experienced with Dad—and that’s painful.
Also, I don’t have any missed calls or voicemails from you in the past month, so when you said I’ve been ghosting you, I truly don’t understand what you’re referring to.
And I need to say this clearly: when you said “family doesn’t care about mental illness,” that hit me really hard. It felt deeply insensitive, especially knowing what I’ve been going through. That kind of comment doesn’t reflect the care or compassion I know you’re capable of.