Stranger in Me

I’m a hostage in my own world’

- Malcolm McCormick

Ever heard of the infamous quote ‘ Money is the root of all evil’ ? Well if you were ever a little skeptical about it, this will change your mind. The year is 2017, I recently started my first semester of UIC. ‘Fresh meat’ all over again, isn’t that fun. Well it was fun up until I let the temptation of money and drugs engulf me in one of my worst decisions I could have made. I began to work in the automotive industry. Just in case you don’t know the automotive industry is like living in the jungle. You have to be a hustler in order to see a glimpse of success. Anyways, I started off as a porter which was fine with me because I was a full time student and I wanted extra money for gas and food, so this was perfect. An opportunity to once more show responsibility. But little did I know that I was going to become mesmerized by what the automotive industry has to offer me. Joshua, one of the sales consultant gave me glimpse of what his pay day was like and to be completely honest with you, this guy was amateur. He didn’t want more for himself which made me feel more hungry for myself. There was no way I was going to allow myself to become comfortable with myself and not want more. When I saw what he was making by just siting in his cubicle playing on his phone, I was simply dumbfounded. It was at that moment I started implementing into my brain ‘ If he could do it, so can I’. Unfortunately, that statement was the motivation for me dropping out of school.

Remember how I told you this industry is like the jungle? Well if you don’t eat, you’ll cease to exist. Joshua wasn’t eating so he ended up parting ways with the company. You hate to see it happen but that is just the way life goes. Just in case you didn’t know, allow me to take the time to lay down some rather important information: the company paid us via commission, so if you didn’t talk to a client all day you made no money. I had put myself through vigorous training exercises because I needed to produce numbers for myself. Scared money makes no money, so of course I was going to learn the most I can and make this my craft.

Two months in and I decided to drop out of school and move out of my parents house. Sounds scary for young buck like myself and it was scary because I had no sense of self control. On a weekly basis I had a party, sessions, or cook outs with friends and family. At the time I thought I was doing it right and by that I mean living life. I was living under a different roof than my parents, throwing parties every week and supporting my family. Just by knowing this much already , you’re probably wondering this kid is living life, what’s so bad about it? Well the bad came from working hard and playing harder. With me being in the automotive industry, demons I never thought I had finally decided to show. Instead of using the extra money I saved for something smart to invest in, I decided to use it to buy materialistic merch, spend it on concerts and throwing parties . In my opinion, the dumbest thing you’ve I could’ve done with my earnings. This is how I lived my life for about a year and then I finally met my maker: The police.

“On the road somewhere, all alone

But my mind and my head, it ain’t there...”

- Kentrell Gaulden

I’ll never forget the night the colors of freedom meant my arrest. It was a beautiful Thursday night my friends and I just came back from a route, direct deposit hit my account and there was a bop playing. Get Paid by Young Dolph was on the radio when the good ol’ red, white, and blue appear in my mirrors. Not the flashing lights you’d like to see on the weekend. Laramie and 24th right past the bridge that goes over Cicero Metra Station, if you’re familiar with the area then you know it’s a semi-busy intersection. There are couple of different ways I could go on about what happened to me but the important part is it’s over now

“ Yeah, almost didn’t make it, but I made it through

Yeah, gettin’ to the money, if you snooze , you lose”

- Symere Woods

For 2 years I have been full time in the industry, but it wasn’t until July of 2019 where I decided to go back to school. In all honesty, this is the best thing I could’ve done for myself. The automotive industry is a dying industry, so I needed an out. The new cause for this seems to be because of the internet. Back before the internet was even thought of, being a sales consultant was a great opportunity for people to make some good money. By that, I mean there was more room for negotiation with customer, revealing a better opportunity to make bigger profit. If you’re wondering what the internet has to do with the margin of profits in the automotive industry, it's literally everything. In the ‘old school’ sales era clients wouldn’t be aware of the price of a vehicle upon arriving at the dealership. Everything has changed now due to the existence of the internet. Nowadays people can just go on their phone and look up thee car of their choice and find out the best possible price based on its age and condition. Which if you are a car shopper makes life a whole life easier, and it is often encouraged, it saves you so much time and money. To give a better understanding of how the internet affects profit, think about it this way; people expect the best product at the lowest price possible, so what did the auto industry do? Car dealerships now must advertise their lowest price possible in order to just bring in leads. In doing so, thousands of dollars in profit has fizzled away. Clients from all over the state, country, and even the world don’t mind traveling the distance for their next vehicle. For the sole fact that they now know they are going to be paying the lowest price possible.

“ To suffer is one thing; another thing is living with the photographed images of suffering”

- Susan Sontag x “ In Plato’s Cave “

There is a literally hundreds of photos of cars I needed to sell in my camera roll and having all those photos holds the weight of suffering.

For me, I never knew what I wanted with my life. I was only chasing the check and wasting my money. Now that I’m out of it full time I have more time to help my family run business. It’s the first time in my life I have a sense of purpose and excited about. During the crash of ‘08 my father and uncle bought a couple of buildings in Logan Square, which I help repair 2 days out of the week. Once we finish the apartments upstairs we are going downstairs and opening the bar. The Mozart is the name of the bar and where I’ll be spending majority of my 20s.

My life is all over the place, but so is everybody’s life. Balance. You can be busy as a bee but as long as you can balance out everything, you can achieve anything.

‘ Industrial societies turn their citizens into image junkies” Sontag said this on page 24 in her piece “ In Plato’s Cave”. Which if you think about for a moment, it is quite disturbing. The creators of Instagram and Facebook spent years in trying to find the right algorithm in order to keep people in their apps , causing them to pollute their mind with unnecessary ideas. It’s one the reasons why the rich stay rich and the poor are getting poorer.

“ First you get that money then you get that power “ Jeffery Williams

All in all , from the time I dropped out of college two years ago to now, I have grown. I know now that if I want to be successful I have to be patient. I dropped out because I was chasing the money, now I realize that investing in myself and getting my education will do more for me in the long run compared to the automotive industry. “ Money is the root of all evil “. Having money doesn’t make you a bad person, what you do and how you use that money says a little bit about yourself though. I am at point in my life where things will start falling into place, but in order for me to accomplish my goals I have to prepare for them and execute when needed. I have that tunnel vision where I am not going to let anything nor anyone step in my way until I get what I want.