Following Your Path In Our Story
Following Your Path In Our Story
There’s no shame in following a well-traveled path, but if you’re looking for something more, there are plenty of other roads to explore, and plenty of good reasons to embark on them. Taking the road less traveled has many advantages. It does, though, take clarity, courage and conviction; and the steadfast determination to not let unproductive comparisons sway you from what matters most to you.
In Our Story
Well lucky Red has an ACTUAL path that leads the way for her. She steps "into the woods, and immediately the earth beneath (her) trembled. The leaves rustled and spread apart. The tree roots sank into the ground, and the stones rose up out of the dirt, creating a path- (her) path- stretching straight into The Woods toward Granny's house." (p. 10)
Not all of us have this of course... and we must find our own way. This is hugely important though, and maybe the finding of the way on your own is a lesson in itself.
Less Fear of Failure
While nothing in life is risk-free, some paths have clearer roadmaps than others. Carving a new path tends to involve a lot of trial and error, which can also mean greater potential for failure. But experiencing failure more often can help us change our relationship to it (see page section on Growth Mindset), and come to view it as a learning opportunity rather than a verdict on our ability. This growth mindset can, in turn, make success more likely.
Thicker Skin
Facing judgment and disapproval for our choices can be painful. But over time it becomes clear that others’ judgment often has more to do with their own fears and insecurities than with our shortcomings. Seeing things from this angle can help us take hurtful comments less personally and increase our empathy.
More Tolerance
There are certainly times when the road less traveled is an insular one that promotes a sense of superiority and intolerance. But more often than not, those who have gone against the grain recognize that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to happiness and there are many different ways to lead a fulfilling and moral life.
Unexpected Community
Taking a different path than the majority of one’s peers can be lonely at times, but it can also open up new possibilities for connection. For example, even though writer Cheryl Strayed set out to hike the Pacific Crest Trail on her own, as documented in her memoir, Wild, she found community with other hikers—and with the landscape itself. As she wrote, "The wilderness had a clarity that included me.”
Freedom to be Who you Are
There’s nothing inherently inauthentic about a conventional lifestyle, but it’s not for everyone. When we find ourselves living lives that don’t align with who we are, we suffer psychologically—research suggests that authentic self-expression is a vital component of well-being, even when it sets us apart from others. We’re even better off losing some friends if it means we can be truer to ourselves.
Opportunity to Create your own Meaning
There's no shortage of opinions about what it takes to make life meaningful. Some argue that life doesn’t have meaning until one gets married or has kids, while others place a higher value on professional success. But meaning is a deeply personal, subjective experience. Research suggests that the types of experiences that give us a sense of meaning—like kindness or overcoming adversity—are not constrained by culturally defined milestones.
Inspiration to Others
When we embrace alternative life paths, we help make those paths more acceptable—and accessible—for others. we can positively influence those around us just by embracing who we are.
10 ways to inspire others
Build up those around you.
Be enthusiastic.
Have integrity.
Be empathetic.
Maintain a positive outlook.
Practice gratitude.
Stand your ground.
Set clear goals and strive to achieve them.
"The Road not Taken" -by Robert Frost
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
“The Road Not Taken” is a poem that argues for the importance of our choices, both big and small, since they shape our journey through life. For Frost, the most important decisions we make aren’t the ones we spend tons of time thinking about, like who we have relationships with, where we go to college, or what our future career should be. Instead, Frost’s poem posits that the small choices we make each and every day also have big impacts on our lives. Each decision we make sets us upon a path that we may not understand the importance of until much, much later.
This theme is reflected throughout the poem. For instance, the poem begins with a speaker placing us in a scene, specifically at the point where two roads break away from each other in the middle of a “yellow wood.”
The speaker is sorry they cannot go both directions and still “be one traveler,” which is to say that they cannot live two divergent lives and still be one single person. In other words, the speaker can’t “have their cake and eat it, too.” The speaker has to choose one direction to go down, because like in life, making a decision often means that other doors are subsequently shut for you.
Read Alouds
Know your Strengths
Strengths are natural capabilities and skills that each person has. When a person uses their strengths, they tend to feel energized, and they report higher levels of self-esteem, well-being, and other desirable outcomes.
People who know their strengths and use them frequently tend to feel happier, have better self-esteem, and are more likely to accomplish their goals. However, many people have a hard time identifying their strengths. They see them as ordinary, even when they are not.
In order for people to use their strengths effectively, it’s important that they have a clear idea of what they are and how they can be used.
Here are some great questions you can ask yourself to help you figure things out...
What sort of activities fill you with energy?
Tell me about the best experience you remember having.
What makes a day really good for you?
When do you feel you were at your best during the past week?
What are your goals for the future?
What traits do you admire in other people?
Be sure to hone in on core strengths, rather than specific skills. For example, “basketball” isn’t a strength, but “athleticism” and “discipline” are. You can do this by asking questions such as “What makes you good at basketball?” or “What about yourself allowed you to be successful in this area?
Here are some signs to help your realize strengthss..
Being drawn to things that allow for use of the strength.
Desiring to use the strength and feeling drained if not using it.
Prioritizing tasks that require use of the strength.
Desire to learn new information related to the strength.
Sense of energy and engagement when using the strength.
Having success when using the strength.
Here are seven meaningful activities to help you find purpose in the world:
Create a family tree: Grab the construction paper, scissors, glue, and paint—it’s time to get crafty! It’s so important to understand the legacy each of us were born into. As Maui (from Disney’s Moana) says, it’s about “knowing where you are, by knowing where you’ve been.” So gather the family photos, pop some popcorn, and make a family craft night out of it! Make it fun—telling stories of the good memories, sharing lessons learned from the not-so-good memories, and shaping your own branches of the family tree.
Write a purpose statement: This is a great activity. It can be as long or short as you like—it just needs to represent what’s truly the most important to you or your family. Once the purpose statement is written, paint it on a canvas or write it out nicely or something. Maybe even frame it?
Teach that everybody is important: This is so true. Every person has a role to play, a purpose to fulfill. And they bring value to the world by being alive! Every single person is an integral part of humankind;
Establish a list of strengths: Think of the things you do well. Like.. really do well. And don't say there arent any. Everyone is good at sosmething. If you feel stuck maybe ask your grownups or teachers or friends for things about you that they think are strengths or gifts that you posses. Try making a “strengths chain” with your child. It’s a cool activity that lets your child see strengths in a tangible way. Your child can also make an “accomplishments box.” It’s a fun way for kids to see what they’re doing well. Make a list of these and keep them in mind as you go about your life or try new things.
Construct a collage of interests: Ask questions. And listen in order to better understand where you truly find joy. Then find pictures of things you are interested in. For example: fashion, animals, baking, TV, cars, sports, places you want to visit, etc. (For old-school types, feel free to use magazine clippings, pictures, and posterboard. But for those digital-lovin’ folks, this can be created on the computer.) Then, create a collage of the favorite things. This is a great way to associate interests or passions with purpose. And it’s a fun activity to do together!
Get a Job: Yes, you read that correctly. Do some work to help out around the house. Think of and do jobs to help the family. Things that you know you will be good at, and even things that you may not be successful at the first time around. We have to learn how to fail forward. Mistakes are good, because you learn from them. Just because you fail the first time around doesn’t mean you should quit. Try again. Try a new way. And try again. Create a chore chart, and allow them to experience the responsibility of hard work, and also the joys that come with a job well done. (And goodness knows that a little bribery—er . . . allowance—is a great association between a little hard work and moolah.)
Live an inspirational life: There is no better way to learn about purpose than by living your own life with intention. What are your dreams? What goals are you working to achieve? Why did you choose your path? What inspires you? Where do you hope to be in 10, 15, 20 years? Where would you like to visit one day? How do you hope to be remembered when you die? What mark do you want to leave on this earth? Facilitating these open (and yes, sometimes vulnerable) conversations with yourself at an early age will only prompt these intimate and open conversations as you grow and mature.