Journals

Cycles.  Everything is in cycles.  Samsara is represented in everything.  The eternal cycle of birth, life, death, and rebirth.  Creation, sustenance, destruction, recreation.

The "Prince" suggested the children of Cappidocius exist in some kind of cycle where they encounter a catastrophe every 500 years or so.  Good thing my Clan doesn't come from their blood.  We carved our own path at the guidance of an ancient mummy.  We earned our place as undead.  Not that it matters all that much.

Society in general follows those cycles, too.  There is a time to build, to grow, to destroy, and to rebuild.  Our Domain is no different.

If this supposed African spirit of destruction truly does awaken, that will just be another part of the cycle.  As much as some will try to argue differently, this Domain has been in a time of peace for a while.  Eventually, we will enter a time of strife.  Some will be lost, some will survive.  Then, we will rebuild.

A time of strife would be useful for us.  This Domain has so many neonates and sireless childer.  They need a taste of what life as an undead monster can really be like.

We've fought, but when's the last time any of these people have truly fought for something of value?  How many of them have fought with their lives on the line?  That's when you see someone's true colors.  That's when people wake up.

Without such struggle, people forget how different we really are from mortals.  People forget the value and the burden of being a vampire.  That's how you get people arbitrarily embracing some random kid because a fledgeling doesn't want to give up his boyfriend.

Easy times breed weak men, weak men breed hard times, hard times breed strong men, strong men breed easy times.  Just another cycle.  This Domain feels so weak.

Admittedly, the concept that we might have to work with the werewolves to physically fight whatever this spirit is has gotten my attention.  That would be a true test for these people.  An actual fight for their lives.  And maybe an opportunity for me to really let loose.

At the same time, I have my doubts about this whole story.  The world was supposed to end several dozen times in the last decade alone.  I'm sure I've survived hundreds of "end times" in my existence.

The only thing I really hear about the Dead Zone is from Lucas preaching doom and dismay that is always right on the horizon.  Much like the horizon, it's always approaching, but never actually here.  I'm starting to think he is overselling the urgency of this threat.

It feels like we're about to enter a new stage of the eternal cycle.  I'm looking forward to the change to come.

We all have different masks that we wear.  Some of us wear them better than others.  Everyone has some kind of darkness within them, vampires even more so.  The Beast replaces any semblance of a soul we once had, dimming any light there may have been.  Inside, we're not just bad people, we are monsters, predators.

I am very used to changing these masks.  I've had to do that from my youth to this very night.  I can be a somber funeral priest, a jovial- if coarse- gangster, or a cold, emotionless killer.  I am what I need to be.

It's gotten to the point that even I am not sure which face is my real one.  Perhaps none of them.  Maybe I've spent so long as a mercenary creature of the night that I no longer have a fixed identity of my own.

Or maybe I'm thinking too much about this.  Maybe I am still that walking corpse of Dante Corleone that my sire met all those years ago, or that twisted gangster, Dante the Biter, that my father molded me into.  Maybe I'm none of those things.

I suppose labels are rather pointless here.  Who I really am and who I could be are moot.  Whether it be John Doe Mori or Dante Capaccetti, I am a flesh eating monster, a mercenary, and a killer.

My mask isn't the only one I'm concerned about.

I'm still trying to understand Catalina. She is rather curt and distant with me, which is interesting.  Normally, a full blood bond would force much more affection out of someone.

Perhaps she is immune, or perhaps this is just as warm as she gets.  Stranger things have happened.

If she wanted to kill me, I'm almost certain she would have tried already.  She's been letting me carve up and eat her flesh.  That would be a strange ploy if she had ill intent.  No, I don't think she wants to hurt me or my coterie, but there is still quite a bit of mystery about her.

Meanwhile, Jynx has made some interesting moves.

Our "Mr. Hat" has apparently told the "Prince" about some Ethan Carter III, or something, that is after Zero.  I can't tell what the idea is here.  Does Jynx think this will misdirect and distract them?  Is she slipping under that stoic disguise?  Or is she really turning against us?

I can't imagine who in this Domain would be able to offer her something worth betraying the group, but nothing is impossible.

We are brethren in arms, we trust each other to an extent.  But at the end of the night, we're still a clan of mercenaries.  Everyone has a price and no one is truly loyal.

I will admit, if she intents to turn against me, that will make things... interesting.  She's one of the few in this Domain that might be a challenge in a real fight.

But that's looking too far into one potential outcome.  She seemed enthusiastic about wanting to kidnap Zero and steal his clan's plant magic.

Whatever happens, I think next year we're going to see the true colors of many members of this Domain.  Hopefully the new year will wake some of them up and we can make things very, very, interesting.

“Can you believe it? Something imprisoned here so bad that it got Garou, Mages,

Vampires, and Changelings to team up to lock it away? Sounds pretty crazy.” Lucas asked

the serpent coiled around his shoulders as he examined the apples on the twisted tree. The

vitae had made the tree grow stronger and faster than normal, but it also gave the bark a

darker tint and the branches gnarled and twisted more sharply, a sign that Lucas had been

tending this tree for many years.

Such a monster must be frightening indeed. The snake hissed back to him, Perhaps

a greater spirit? Surely no entity simply belonging to one of the groups who sealed it could

be so powerful as to bear such a response. She coiled together around his shoulders

protectively. Perhaps it is not a good time for you to be spending so much time near the

seal? You know that you are not a strong warrior, even though you are an adequate

sorcerer.

“Thanks for the vote of confidence…” Lucas replied “... I promise that whatever

happens to be down there, I won't challenge it to a fistfight.”

You make light of what could be the greatest threat you would see in centuries? The

snake countered, I fear for your safety, as is my place as your caretaker, but I know you

intend to reach out to Garou. That is a dangerous task, as we have had no formal relations

since the war in Scotland where the White Howlers fell to darkness. They could ignore you,

or worse hunt you. You do not live in the protections of a city and are the most vulnerable.

‘That has occurred to me, and I won’t just walk up to their Caern and say knock on

their doors. I’m using some common sense, but they would probably have the best record of

the time period and events in question. I have to take the risk.”

Who is everyone as a Monster High character (based on what Teddy thinks/knows of people, not gender based at all) 

Dante: Moanica Decay

Lucas: Venus McFlytrap 

Zero: Jane Boolittle 

Hat: Inivisi-Billy 

Nancy: Headless Headmistress Bloodgood 

Casey: Mr Where 

Robyn: Whisp Grant 

Hyacinth: Draculara 

Me (Teddy): Holt Hyde  

Di: Deuce Gorgon 

Elsie: Kjersti Trollson 

Emery: Clawdeen Wolf 

Fabien: School Photographer 

Imogen: Mr Mummy 

Sharon: Cleo de Nile 

Isaac: Mr Hackington 

Sir Aslan,

I am writing this letter to inform you that Wilma has been found. I managed to speak with her directly, after jumping through hoop after hoop. She is under some kind of influence at the moment, wrapped up in something clearly restraining her ability to think and act correctly for herself. The cause is a woman by the name of Lita Naraya. She is of our nature and disposition, so you would know better than I with what methods she managed to wrap Wilma around her finger. I am steadily engaging with Lita in an attempt to get on her side in many matters that are occurring here. Now that I've pieced together the cause of Wilma's disappearance. What would you prefer I do next?

Also, you wouldn't happen to have any keen insight into stopping 'large conglomerates' from escaping 'very physically binding agreements', would you? In a sort of spontaneous and 'out of thin air' case, like a magician might do? We are all struggling with a problem here, and for my sake and quite possible yours I am trying to find a solution to it as well. Besides that, please let me know.

With Regards,

Paul

Obsession. A luring siren which pulls us into our darkest moments. In life it can be a driving force, but coming to death it is a shackle which can hold us onto the living world. Spirits of the deceased, holding onto what they can and coming back from the Underworld to finish their business. While these spirits can be dangerous as long as their business does not cause them to interact with you, they can often be ignored. At the end of the day, even though they are dead, they are still the people we knew in life just a touch more unhinged. Do not be misinformed, a ghost can be very dangerous and if have a new ghost, be wary, be on guard, and seek professional help in interacting with them. If they turn out to not be malignant, then don't worry too much about them being in your home or workplace.

Somewhere on the internet, a professor rating forum

-Comments for Professor F. Mesny at UIUC-

user8239042 (took the professor’s class): interesting guy. only offers evening classes, never

replies to your emails during regular office hours. i legit don’t think he gets any sleep, man

regularly grades papers at 4 am. good classes tho, he knows what he’s doing unlike some other

professors.

rated: 3.0 / 5

user9034294 (took the professor’s class): Good teacher, really cares about the artistic and

aesthetic value of whatever play we’re working on. When it comes to acting classes, he makes

sure to talk to everyone separately and give advice depending on their performance. Come

watch our play on *date* at *location*!!

rated: 4.0 / 5

user0345993 (took the professor’s class): fucking bastard. son of a bitch. kicked me out of

class, i have to stay one more semester cuz of this fucker

rated: 0 / 5

user5494853 (took the professor’s class): Overall pretty good, just you must be careful about

what he’s chill about and what he absolutely doesn’t accept. He doesn’t give many assignments

other than studying our roles etc. If you have a reasonable excuse (and I’m including personal

situations or mental problems as well, he’s understanding about it), he’s willing to give you an

extended deadline or let you skip class for that day. However, if you don’t work on the plays,

regularly skip rehearsals and stuff... good luck with that.

p.s. Saw him a few times at one of the bars just outside of town, you would never think a type

like him would frequent places like that lol

rated: 4.4 / 5

user1983204 (took the professor’s class): i’m honestly not sure lmao he’s good, very

knowledgeable. on the other hand, some things that he says are very questionable– especially

about some writers and poets. sometimes he talks as if he knew them personally, says things

that are completely opposite to what we actually know about them. sometimes i just want to

send the relevant wikipedia page to him

mumbles to himself a lot in french, who knows what he is saying about us

rated: 2.5 / 5

“So, Lil’s, I met some nice folks, there was a woman with a rabbit, some ancient

english princess, and a frat guy who all seemed nice.” Lucas said, reclining on a worn-out sofa next to

the snake’s basket. “The guys running the bar are still pretty chill too.”

...And you did nothing to disgrace your mother, or great-mother, or the Dark Mother, I’m sure. Lily

hissed back from her blue velvet cushion. Did you do anything useful, or did you just share your

substances around and tempt other kindred to your life of indolence?

“Hey now, that's kinda harsh.” Lucas retorted, setting the last remnants of a joint in the ashtray on

the end table. “I have to build trust, a report if you will, before I start talking about religion with folks. You

know nothing is as big a turn off as a pushy missionary. We just have to take things slow.”

The second you take things slow your addled brain will lose sight of the goal. We will sit here as

years turn into decades, you will bring no one into the faith, and you will waste your gifts. The Dark

Mother calls her childer to action, to greatness, to climb the path of daggers and to reclaim the Garden,

and so far all you have done is devise ways to GET HIGH.

“I’ve also cultivated apples, flowers, and berries. The mushrooms didn’t work but all in all I think

my garden is looking pretty nice.”

THAT’S NOT WHAT RECLAIMING THE GARDEN MEANS!!!!

“I know, but it’s a start, it gives me a reason to hang out with the other vampires. Trust me.”

You are a fool, Lucas, but a precious fool. Lily softly hisses as she slithers up to drape over his

shoulder, rotating a heat lamp after her with her tail.

Seeing Jackson Stephens learn about and interact with Stephanie really reached something buried deep within me. Here I was thinking he would be a killer, or at least a coldly complicit deadbeat father. Instead, he was a man harmed by the expectations of his family who had no idea about the wicked plans that transpired around him. In a way, I can kind of relate.

I know what it means to have society disapprove of your relationships up to the point of putting you in danger of very real harm. I know what it is to have your father hate what you love. But I can't let myself get attached like this. He could have been lying for all I know. Someone who could make a deal to have a woman murdered and the baby ripped out of her and sent away would certainly be clever and cruel enough to keep up an act to try and fool a group of idiots who seem way too invested in a case they have nothing to do with. Consider every angle.

...

You know, I don't think I ever said a proper goodbye to Tony. I didn't think we'd be apart for long when he died. Guess I lost track of time being dead for so many years. Oh, well, not like he could hear me. If he were a ghost, pretty sure he would have let me know by now. Tearing out his heart should have been good enough parting words... I need to stop dwelling on him. That's not the world I occupy anymore.

All of this would have been easier if Jackson was the real killer. Stephanie's rage would have probably caused her to kill him and things would be wrapped up well enough. Sure, we haven't found the child, but it wouldn't matter nearly as much with both parents dead and the case wrapped up.

It might be nice to see a story wrap up with a hopeful ending for once in this unlife.

Then again, the cynical side of me might get a grim satisfaction seeing a child reject the parent who set about the machinations that left them abandoned and motherless.

Yeah, can't be too nice. Gotta maintain this dead heart for what it is.

(Just some scribbles on a piece of paper, in French, with the usage of notably words and

expression)

Potential targets:

(It’s a list of artists in town with detailed descriptions of their show, including the dates, hours

and locations. Some names are crossed and if someone paid attention, they could notice that

those are people with shows during the day. There is one person that is marked with a green

pen. Her sudden and inexplicable death was announced a few weeks ago.)

—

Toreador–

Accused by the Camarilla because of the killing of his sire

born in 1651 - died in *the date is blackened as if he scrabbled after writing it*

sire: Clément Durand

—

minor, trivial - T

trivial - N N - major

minor - L R - trivial

—

“I came across this poem again, the poem of Alfred de Musset a few days ago. I know you

wouldn’t like it, you wouldn’t like to hear about sadness. But that’s what I feel, Viola, that’s all I

feel– if I do actually feel something.”

(There’s a 4 verse-poem in French copied below.)

Oblivaeon, the end of all things. The place where nothing is, yet all has been. Past the edges of the perceivable and inperceivable worlds, lies Oblivaeon.

 A place that can draw in anything yet almost nothing is capable of getting out. It seeks to draw in and destroy. A black hole located not in the vastness of space, but sideways in reality. That begs the question, if this is a place to which all things are destined to be drawn into, what sort of being could make its way out of this place.

 Beings strong enough to pull back against the void are a threat far greater than one could possibly imagine. No matter what your views on the other beings which go bump in the night, know this. When something knocks upon the gates of Oblivaeon, everyone must hold it closed lest all life, all beings be put in danger. 

“Love is such a precious and ephemeral thing, you know?” Lucas said as he walked along the

small pond in the forest clearing. “The Dark Mother was spurned twice and still left her heart open to the

Lightbringer, and they built a garden together. Shouldn’t we defend love as a tenant of the faith?”

Mortal love is flighty and inconsequential in the Age of Ash and Bitter Tears, it is a pale mockery

of what the Dark Mother had.. However, that doesn’t mean that it has no place in their own lives. They

must find their own meaning, for they have been truly abandoned by their creator. The snake beside him

hissed. Lily slithered her way up a small apple tree and met the vampire’s eyes. If you feel that stopping

this lonely cainite from destroying mortal relationships is important then it is not my place to tell you that

you are wrong, just to tell you that it is a distraction. The Dark Mother has chosen you for something

larger, and it remains to be seen what that is.

Lucas sat beneath the tree biting into an apple and draining the sweet juice. Once done he tossed

the remnants of the fruit to a pair of squirrels across the pond. “I guess I like seeing people being happy.

It happens less and less recently. To suffer as the Dark Mother suffered is divine, I know, but she did

know her own happiness before the gardens fell. Should we not seek to emulate that too?”

The snake paused and looked over at the vampire, Perhaps... In your individual journey there will

be times of suffering and times of succour but we march towards an ending, and whether it comes

tomorrow or a thousand years hence it will be an ending of ashes, blood, and desolation. So yes, darling

Lucas, enjoy your small victories, because the only joy left for you in the world are the small deviations

you find, but beware that you cannot lose yourself in the lives of others, because you belong to Lilith, and

hers is a path of anguish. Find beauty in the ashes of the final garden if you may, and sow your bitter

tears of laughter if you can, but when the end of ends comes be ready to find the embrace of the Dark

Mother.

“Lily, your faith is an inspiration to me.” Lucas said, a tear of crimson blood rolling down his cheek,

as he lit the rolled joint he had produced from a jacket pocket. “Ahi Hay Lilitu.” he muttered as he stared

up at the moon and began to cry.