If you have to do any venting about work, coworkers, any thing work related, be EXTREMELY careful about where you are doing it and whether those messages could ever, even accidentally, get back to the people you are talking about, or to your manager.
As the person who gets to sort through all those emails, YES, YES, AND YES. Good lord people put stupid things in email. And IM. And text messages. And about a bazillion other mediums and apps that can be collected and used as part of a litigation. Our work chat program stores the conversations in plain text in a particular location, and IS can pull them as needed.
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I know someone who stayed logged on to her personal email in her office, with the browser remembering the password. Someone who wanted her fired went in, looked through her files, printed out emails criticizing board members, and sent a copy to each board member.
I got a loooooot of raised eyebrows when I started pointing that out to my work friends and suggesting they actually think about the level of access Big Brother could have into their lives if he looked and maybe be judicious about things like teleworking from the same computer they use for personal stuff.
I follow the same rules with gossip, not that I do all that much of it. Talk about coworkers to friends, talk about friends to family, talk about family to coworkers, but never cross the streams and talk about someone who the other person knows.
Some people derive energy from gossiping. It would be more to the point to figure out why their energy levels are low.
But yes, all that grammar school behavior drives the good employees right out the door.
This happened to one of my colleagues. She had traded emails trash talking her manager with a teammate. For some reason, there was an investigation into teammate and their emails were brought to the attention of HR. They were both terminated.
I had a coworker previously that took a picture of another coworker who fell asleep in a long, drawn-out presentation that was presented totally in the dark. She sent it around to the office to gossip.
This may seem low stakes to you, but imagine the nightmare scenario where this does get around in a public way. The next time you apply for a job or ask someone out and they google you, is this what you want them to know about you?
Another thing to remember is that the chat log often gets auto saved as a conversation in the email folder. A fun trash talker today can turn into a disgruntled narc tomorrow who forwards emails of the convocation to your boss. I have seen this happen So. Many. Times.
The first paragraph just reiterated to them that they used to have a personal flaw, in much harsher language than they used, and after they admitted to having those issues once. The second condescendingly told them that they could change. None of it pointed toward celebration or acknowledgement that they had changed.
I think you often leave very thoughtful and entertaining comments but sometimes you come across unnecessarily harsh and charitable towards other commenters. I have been and am trying very hard to give you the benefit of the doubt and I hope you can extend the same to others here.
I used to have a vent friend at an older, much worse job. For boring reasons, I really did know I could trust her. There were times it was really helpful to talk to someone who got how toxic the job was, and other days where it really crossed over into not being a great use of my time and even making me feel worse.
I got away with all my IM trash talking and left with a great reputation (or as great as you can have with the nutjobs I worked for). But it definitely reinforced a bad habit of spending too much time on personal conversations at work. My old bosses deserved that. My next ones did not!
However, I did once work in an office where inter-office chat gossip blew up rather spectacularly, resulting in threats, blackmail and multiple firings. Made for a pretty tense atmosphere for a while after.
I was fortunate to learn it in a lower-stakes way, when my boss accidentally forwarded a slightly undiplomatically worded email of mine to a client. It was only mildly embarrassing, but it made me realize how easy it is for emails to go astray.
This boss also expected everyone to know her birthday and lavish her with expensive gifts that were well above their pay level (bouquets of roses, expensive chocolates, designer purses), so she definitely had issues.
So OP are you straight out talking about specific things and naming people, or does everyone have a code name. Either way gossiping about them is going to turn out bad for you especially since there is a trail that someone can print off. We call our main boss Big Bird, she is tall and wears an unreasonable amount yellow 2 piece suits (like 3 a week). Big Bird is the office Nazi, sending out warnings for being slightly out of dress code, talking for too long, and spending too much on company paid lunches. Throughout the office we IM when Big Bird is in a mood, or is on a personal day. But never disparaging stuff about her work (or lack there of since she is spending her time being the office nazi). Are you all just being mean or is someone getting something out of this.
Stop doing this. Someone in my last job who resigned had been having rude shit-talking email exchanges with a c-suite level exec and the c-level exec was fired when these came to light. Turns out the person who was picking up the work for the person who left needed to access her emails and saw these conversations and brought them to the attention of HER boss, another top level exec who was the person being talked about. This made it to the attention of the CEO and the remaining exec was walked out the door.
Not sure if this has been mentioned, but ya gotta be careful with your company IM. The one we use has the ability to link someone in by typing their name (kinda like an autofill on an email address, another way to screw up electronic communications). I have seen people burned by gossiping about Person C, not realizing that they just linked Person C into the chat.
The end result (after a year or three) was that I ended up the manager of a highly functioning team, where people knew they were appreciated and why. And the unintended side-effect? The trash talk just withered back to nothing.
Another point is that on chat you do not have any non verbal cues from the other party. You may be mouthing off about someone and the other person could be offended or horrified. At least face to face you have the option to backpedal if you sense you have gone too far. Just a thought.
OP, another reformed trash-emailer here: I stopped when, after I left a job, the company called my best friend at that job on the carpet over exchanges they found in MY email. Did our mutual target deserve some static? Yeah. Did I regret getting my best friend in trouble? Very, very much.
No one likes mean girls. They are seen as vapid, immature, and annoying. These people will not want to have any partnof you and you are likely to be the first to be let go of there is a downsizing because your manager will see you as a worthless extra weight, not someone to fight and die for on the team.
As uncomfortable as I was learning that I looked like a safe person to rant to, probably pales in comparison to being that person who has entire incriminating conversations flashing before their eyes.
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We are a lucky generation. The generation before us has witnessed the end of decades or centuries. But very few have witnessed the end of the millennium and the start of another. And we are two decades into the new millennium.
So it is for the year 2020. We are now two decades into the new century and the new millennium, life appears to be great, the future is full of optimism, the grass-is-green-and-the sky-is-blue kind of Optimism.
I will offer some data points, from the past 20 years and then compare them to the current scenario and then perhaps come to a conclusion whether we should be anxious and miserable or grateful, happy and optimistic about the future.
The start of 2000 brutal. Internationally, we had the dotcom bubble, followed by the twin tower tragedy in September 2001, which led to the long war against terror in Afghanistan, Iraq which is still ongoing 20 years later. Harry Potter book series was launched and became the fastest-selling book series of all time. Euro was introduced in 12 countries in the Eurozone. Closer home, on 26th January 2001, Bhuj earthquake shook up the Indian state of Gujarat.
The Internet revolution, despite the dotcom bubble, continued. LinkedIn got founded in 2002, two years later Facebook got founded in 2004 by Mark Zuckerberg and Google got listed in the same year. And Elon Musk founded Tesla.
The teens and hordes of young people discovered internet chat rooms. Yahoo! Messenger, ICQ was a rage. Today one will find it quaint. You logged in one of the chat rooms, started to chat with strangers. Of course, you never gave your real name, but some made-up names likeMusky93 or Roli20. And strangers would DM you with A/S/L, as soon as you entered a chat room. A/S/L stood for age, sex and location.
In India, on the 10th of Jan 2008, the Sensex stood at 20812. On 27th October it stood at 8509. A massive 12303 drop or nearly 60% drop as Dalaal Street reacted to the happenings on Wall Street. But by the end of 2009, Sensex was back at 17464 on 31st December 2009. Trillions were lost world over, billions of lives were affected and thousands were wiped off during that time.
For the first time in 2009 Indian GDP crossed the trillion-dollar mark at 1.3 trillion. Despite the challenges of the Global Financial Crisis, India went from USD 800 Billion GDP in 2005 to 1.3 Trillion GDP in 2009. Nearly doubling the size of the economy. 152ee80cbc
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