Anil did hear back, and it was good news.
The next few months consisted of casting the remaining roles, and in that time the connection between Anil and me only grew. Before filming began, we were officially dating.
Anil was my perfect match, making me laugh at all the right times, quickly learning how to deal with my stress and anxiety, planning fun dates and showing me through big and small gestures that I was special to him. I thought that nothing would get in the way of what seemed like the relationship I'd been waiting for.
However, that didn't stop Eshan, the actor playing Ravana, from continually flirting with me. I actually liked Eshan a lot as a person, and to me it seemed his flirtations were only in jest. Anil didn't see it that way.
I resigned myself to talking to Eshan about it, and asked him to eat lunch and run lines with me on a day that Anil wasn't needed on set.
We were eating in my trailer, having a casual conversation when I finally got the nerve to say what I needed to say.
"Eshan, I have to ask you a favor. I think you're a great guy, and I really have enjoyed getting to know you and being your friend during all of this. But, you're constantly flirting with me, and I know it's just you joking around but Anil has been taking it kind of personal. I was hoping you could tone things down a bit, or a lot, actually."
Eshan looked genuinely surprised at my words.
"Wow, Anika, I am so sorry, I had no idea that it was being taken that way. I really thought the three of us had a bit going on, where I flirt and Anil gets all protective. I thought we were all just joking, I swear."
"I know," I said, sighing. "That's how I've been taking it, but Anil, not so much. Do you think you could just maybe apologize to him? I'm hoping we can all just be friends. This is such an amazing opportunity for all of us and I don't want it to be tainted by something like this misunderstanding."
"Yes, of course, I can absolutely do that," he said, nodding his head.
"Thank you so much," I said with relief.
I smiled as I ate the rest of my lunch, feeling hopeful that things were going to get better. I didn't mind reassuring Anil that I only had feelings for him, because it was true, but the jealousy and protectiveness had gotten old. I just wanted us to be happy and enjoy ourselves, and it seemed like that was going to happen now that I'd set things straight with Eshan.
We transitioned into running lines for a scene coming up between Ravana and Sita. It was during the time Sita was being held in Ravana's palace. In our film's version, Ravana kisses Sita several times against her will but never rapes her.
This was one of the scenes where Ravana kisses Sita, and the entire thing gave me chills. Not the good kind of chills though — the creepy, unsettling chills. I had been needing to go over this scene again, wanting to get more comfortable with it. Eshan thought it would help us get into character and more into the scene if he played some dark background music.
Listen here or play the embedded video below as you continue reading.
He wasn't wrong, I realized, as Eshan's eyes turned dark, morphing fully into his character. I let myself truly feel how scared and helpless Sita was, being confronted by her kidnapper, a man she knew wished to take her as his own wife.
"I will never be yours," I said, trying to sound strong as I knew Sita would have.
"That's what you believe now, my darling Sita," Eshan hissed my character's name, moving ever closer. "But one day, you will want to be mine. I could do things to you that your pitiful husband could never do. Make you feel things he never could. And soon, you will realize you want that. You will beg to be my wife, to feel my love. And I will wait patiently."
As he spoke these words, he was following the script by caressing my face with the back of his knuckles, ever so gently. He pushed my hair behind my ear, and rubbed my earlobe between his thumb and forefinger.
I shivered involuntarily.
Before I knew what was happening, Eshan's lips were crushing mine, his hands tangled in my hair, holding my head against his.
I was shocked, and my hands instinctively went to his wrists, wanting to push him away. But then I thought that maybe I didn't make it clear enough that I was only planning on practicing the kiss in front of the cameras. So I simply stood still as Sita was written to do in the script.
I felt an ironic sense of karma realizing that I had also kissed Anil during that first meeting without his knowing beforehand.
Eshan pulled away after what felt like several long moments, and I knew we were done acting as he was smiling normally at me. I gave him a small smile in return, and then my face turned to shock as I saw Anil standing at the door to my trailer.
"Anil, what are you doing here?" I asked, moving away from Eshan and towards Anil. "We were just practicing for our next scene."
"Yeah, it looked like you were doing a lot more than that," he said, his voice low and harsh. "I was coming to surprise you, but I can see you're doing just fine without me."
I heard the music go off, and my head was spinning. Anil stepped out of the trailer and slammed the door behind him. That's when I saw the bouquet of flowers lying on the floor, the bright colors seeming to mock me.
***
Image Information: The Old Farmer's Almanac
Bibliography: Tiny Tales from the Ramayana
Author's Note: So of course, like I said in my last Author's Note, this is a modern retelling of the Ramayana. If you can't already tell, Anika and Anil's relationship is a mirror to Rama and Sita's. I knew I needed some sort of obstacle to get in the way of their relationship, and one of my readers (hi, Rishikaa!) left a comment wondering what role Ravana (or the actor who played him) would play in my Storybook. I admittedly had not yet thought about that, and so her comment inspired this second installment in my Storybook.
In the Ramayana, Ravana kidnaps Sita, hoping to make her one of his wives. Sita refuses him time and time again, and Rama fights a war against Ravana and his kingdom to win Sita back. However, he ends up being unsure if he can be with Sita after she was living under Ravana's roof. He is worried that Ravana took advantage of Sita sexually and that she is no longer pure enough to be his wife. She completes a trial that proves her purity and faithfulness to Rama, but this too ends up not being enough. The people of Rama's kingdom question Sita's purity, and so he sends her into exile while she is pregnant with his twin sons. I tried to mirror that by making Eshan a flirt and Anil jealous, and of course him walking into that kiss, he saw it as just a kiss instead of the two acting out a scene.
I also wanted to portray what it may be like for actresses and women in general who are being taken advantage of by men. Even though they are actors and it's written in the script, I think Eshan should have made sure Anika was okay with practicing the kiss. This also made me recognize my own bias when it comes to consent, I tend to more often feel that women should have been asked consent than men. But I know that it's important for anyone to consent to something like this, even in acting, so I wanted Anika to realize that, too. I also think she should have felt like it was okay to push Eshan away, especially after the conversation they'd just had, but I wanted to use this scene to portray that uncertainty that so many women feel, wondering if they did something wrong or should've done things differently to avoid something happening. Finally, I really liked that there is a kiss in both part 1 and 2, but that they are very much in contrast of one another.
I'm enjoying everyone's feedback, and look forward to more! I want to know what you guys think about Anika, Anil, and Eshan. What do you like about them and what do you dislike? Do you think Eshan really was innocent in his flirting and in that kiss, or does he have other intentions?