Oh my goodness! Oh snap! Oh my Lord! Can I just say, this course really gets me (and I probably sounded like an overwhelmed Atlanta girl or a chick from the Bronx, right?) HAHA! At first, I was this tiny and fearful lamb lurking into the fences of wolves. Metaphorically, the lamb is my photography skill set and the wolves symbolize the actual class. By the way, you’re actually on the right page, yes, this is still As2, okay? I was actually planning to save this feeling of mine for Blog 2 but I can’t help it. I feel like I needed to say this now or never. So, enough with my metaphors because I’m ready to bring it, you don’t have any idea how much excitement pumps into my entire body system as of this writing. Alright, let me say it now. THIS BY FAR, IS MY MOST FAVORITE ASSIGNMENT OF ALL! And with that, I can definitely say that I don’t feel any fear anymore for the upcoming tasks. I will definitely try my best; okay let me rephrase that… I WILL DO MY BEST to reckon the future assignments in the best of my abilities because those fear I felt at the start of the class, it’s gone now. Zero! Every forum, every activity, every task, everything just seems to be inspiring at the moment. Thank God I chose this program! *Sighs* All I am feeling towards this course is pure excitement and hope. Kudos to the course materials, it’s definitely a big help and so as every part of this class. Let me continue this frenzy at BLOG 2, alright? For now, let me show you how I did this activity despite the deficits that challenged me while making it. Sometimes all you need is a little bit of imagination and tons of determination to make it work, so here I go.

Since the only venue that I can use to accomplish this is my bedroom, I had to also make some research about setting up the actual set for the photo-shoot to make sure on how I am going to put everything in place. I watched tutorial videos on Youtube and also searched for some concepts for high fashion photography on Google because desirably, that is the general theme I wanted to plot for my final photos. I also looked up some of my recent photos to see if I can draw some inspiration from it.

.

The enticement level at this point was at its peak already because I’m now going to build my very own set. But the thing is, I don’t have anything to use to begin with and I guess the instinct for resourcefulness was there to back me up. Here’s what I did to come up with my own set…

The first one on the upper right corner is my proposed final photo for the head-shot and the second one on the lower right corner is my proposed final photo for the candid/ freestyle shot.

Yey! There you have it, just some final touches for cropping, brightness/ color adjustment, some ‘vignette’ effect on the corners of the photo (using GIMP) and I thought I was finally relieved. I just have to start the write up for this and wait for the right time to submit it and everything’s all good but then this happened…

After I have packed up everything, I decided not to have these two as my final photos. It was a tough decision though because I was torn between sticking to it and having a completely different output. My instinct says that I had to do the latter option. You'll find out more about how and why I came up with this decision.

I'm honestly a minimalist when it comes to my personal style for wardrobe and interior design (probably because I have lived 24 years of my life in a small but happy space) and it's funny how it doesn't translate to my final photos and you'll see that in the latter part of this output. Okay, going back to the photos, so why in the world did I decide to redo it? That's exactly how ended up my day after my first attempt- I kept asking myself why can't I be at ease with my work like it's all done and all I have to do is to piece it all up together with this write up. And I found the answer to that, there's something missing between that person I captured and myself. I don't know but it did not feel complete to me after all. It's a bit hard to explain but I guess it's probably just a matter of preference, it's like I wanted more. As I've mentioned above, it really did not feel right after I did the initial photo-shoot so it means that I have failed myself in fulfilling my personal aesthetics when it comes to art itself, hence I did it all over again. At this point, I began drafting my concept once again and made sure that it will definitely end up with a bang, hopefully. And another reason for starting all over is that I do not consider this activity as a class assignment but rather as an immersion towards the future. It's a good way for me to really practice not only my styling but also my photography skills because it needs to click together. I wanted not only to capture myself just for sake of the brief of this task. The work-around that I used will be discussed as you read along.

Anyway, the preparation was still the same it's just that I had to work a little harder for the actual set and the positioning of my camera. I have to carefully analyze what part in my room I am going to build that set despite of having a very limited space. By the way, I have to agree with Sir Arvin when he mentioned this from one of his forum posts that this work won't be easy and that we cannot rely to some bunch of "chamba" photos. Definitely it is because this activity almost used up the all the memory- storage of my phone because I have to shoot and shoot and shoot one frame after the other because indeed, "chamba" won't work.

So after some time I can say that it was fulfilling to find something that actually works after swiping like hundreds of pictures that seemed to be not giving me what I wanted to translate in the photo. It's like one of the best "THAT'S IT!" moments in my life. And I know that this is not only for my case but also to the rest of the class. I can only imagine how you guys did it the way I exactly did it since it's a one-man photo-shoot. HAHA! It was definitely one of the fastest sets of 5-10 seconds of our lives because we have to click on that shutter button and at the same time run back to our designated frame spot, composed ourselves and trance into a different person. It was fun, right? Also, being the photographer, the stylist, the director and the model all together is not an easy feat, do you agree? Again, I'm going to talk more about the experience in BLOG 2 but for the meantime let me share with you what I came up with after the second attempt of shooting. Here it is...

And here’s my FINAL HEAD-SHOT PHOTO...

Since it’s the last photo-shoot that I did, I had made sure to basically give my all when I did this. So everything was the same in terms of the preparation except that I really had to lift and move around some props like plants and also I had made sure that everything will be perfectly in place in the frame. This is where I had to change the key light from so many positions because I used a black back drop with a little embellishment at the back, and most of the time, I’d either get a super exposed photo specifically on the portion of my face or I’d get like a very dark lighting. Same weight applies with the number of pictures that I have taken from my first photo-shoot and my final headshot and I think even more with this one. Before getting the final photo, I positioned the key light in the upper left corner of the room facing me and since I didn’t have like a bigger tripod or stand to hold it, what I did was I piled up some laundry basket and some pillows to where I have rested my key light. I also made sure to put like a plastic cover on the floor since I will be pouring water into the plants for some aesthetic purposes like to make it more candid as if I am just watering the plants like a normal green thumb hobbyist. Again, to know more about my interpretation of this photo, you can definitely read till the end. So here’s the final set for my candid/ freestyle shot…

My FINAL CANDID/ FREESTYLE PHOTO…

I had put all hands on deck the moment i knew about this activity. Although I have to shrink myself a little bit because of the tools that this activity might require us to accomplish it. All I ever did was pray every time I click that shutter button on the screen of my phone like "Lord, make it work please". But I didn't let my 5- megapixel camera get in my way, I told myself to chin up and embrace the tool that I have; that I must make it work one way or another because this is the first output where the application of what we learned must transpire into it. And the last thing I have ever thought of while doing the shoot is to find an excuse not to test waters and hold back when it comes to this production. Yes, I'm confidently calling it as a "production" because man, I’ll tell you that the labor I had to go through just to get these photos is a work suited for a crew; well at least 3-5 people crafting it all together. Making the set alone took me 8-9 hours to complete it and that's including the selection for what I am planning to wear (customizing the top to make it look like it's an actual haute or couture and hopefully I have given justice to it *jinx), the positioning of the props (especially for the candid/ freestyle shot), the lighting (oh my god, this is what actually took my entire time), the expressions or emotions that I wanted the lens to capture, make- up, hair, post processing, even the tiniest details, EVERYTHING was so taxing. But why do I have to do all of these when I can just simply get in front of the camera, tick the timer on and get it done as it is? Another thing to think about is that I also work at the same time and I have midterm examinations coming up; I have to review and focus into it somehow. Again, an EXCUSE- and that word doesn't exist in the academe of UP and I have to live up to that (a constant reminder for myself every time I work on something for the courses). I treat everything as my last chance to ace it. Fortunately I was able to balance everything although I had to sacrifice some of my personal time to go out or relax. Well, sacrifice is the ultimate gift when you wanted to do something great. So that is the reason why I pushed myself into my limits. The thing is that I wanted to show who I am as person and as a photographer like when you look into my work, you'd say that it's me as a photographer or as an artist and to also showcase how much determination I can give. I have to always tell myself that I am a photographer while putting everything together and to always put that photographer's hat on my head to see from the eyes of an actual practitioner.

It was really tough and tedious and exhausting. But these are the moments that you will feel tired but happy. That very moment when you finally see the photo and tell yourself, "okay this will work" but deep inside you're like jumping up down and ready to brave whatever storm may pass (okay, that's too dramatic again). But yeah, that is exactly what I have felt after doing this. I almost didn't sleep well after the shoots just because I had to like gaze at the screen of my phone and laptop and my eyes locked into the final product that I did. It was funny though because I kept on asking myself like if I was really the one who did that. I mean, I'm not saying that my work is perfection but for me it is by far one of the greatest artworks I have ever made in my life. I almost felt like I was doing a painting while producing this because I have this notion that if there is like a thought of creativity stirring within me, I have to let it out. I probably might write it down at first or may pin it to my note app in my phone or think about it for hours. And mostly, the only times that I feel like this is when I am itching to sketch or scribble anything. I guess watching reality TV shows about modeling helped me in a large scale because that's precisely what I wanted to do for the rest of my life after graduating. Not the modeling part though, it doesn't suit me in any inch at all especially with my 5'4 ft. height. No. The production or whatever it is that is happening behind the camera that is what I envision. If I were to pursue anything else besides art or being a magazine editor, I am seriously (down to my ancestor's grave) considering becoming a fashion photographer or at least a creative director or maybe both, why not, right?

There is definitely not a single strand of regret revamping the shoot and I'm glad that I followed my instincts. I am also pretty proud of my bed room for letting all the burst of creativity happen there. I never knew I could transform it into a studio, at least a make-shift studio. I am blessed for having it although it's small but its height is enough to give me plenty of space to build my backdrop. My mom asked me why I keep myself locked up in my room these days or what the hell am I doing because I would sometimes skip meals because of the excitement this activity gives me like when I am on the verge of getting hyped up I cannot help but to just keep it rolling. And then I showed her my work, and she just smiled said nothing, and from that moment I knew that she knew all along what I was doing and rather not get in the way. I know that she's proud and happy about it because she's been wanting to buy me a decent digital camera ever since I told her about enrolling myself in this course however, she can't because it's too expensive and I myself can't afford it too at the very moment. But looking at her priceless expression defies all those high end cameras (which I been dreaming of all these years) and all the critiques I may get from this. I could've captured that moment though but she was actually looking at it through my phone which is the only one I can use to take pictures. HAHA!

This is actually my first time having an actual photo-shoot with all the weight on my shoulders. And i didn't think that I could make it. But nonetheless, I think I did a pretty good job. And as you may know, I didn't even spend any penny for this; I just used any available resources for the props just to pull it off. The coat and the long sleeves that I used were from an old cabinet just waiting to be explored. The flowers and synthetic plants plastered on my top were from my mom's collection (she's a teacher and every Valentine’s Day she would receive tons of these from her students) and don't worry I asked her to hand it to me since they were just all piled up somewhere in the house.

The plants (the real ones) were from my father's tiny garden. The vases and the glass jars were on display in the living room. What I am trying to imply here is that sometimes we just have to look around and use whatever is available but of course without any compromise. Like what sir Al said, "Just look up" and my context for that which is inclined for this activity is resourcefulness.

So I’m basically abusing the freedom of utilizing our academic web page. And since we can put anything here then I thought of having some of my outtakes to be part of this work. Below are some of the snaps for both photo-shoots that I did and some old photos where I drew my inspiration for this work.

Thanks for your time! :)