about fur felt hats

(Note to the reader, this is an item that I once-upon-a-time advertised on my ebay store that I called:

JimBob's-American-Excess. The store has been closed since 2005 but while it was open I had a really good time selling these hats)

This is a hat that is like the hat shown in the picture, Size 6 7/8!

Measure your head (see instructions below) and if it's not size 6 7/8 then you can go to my ebay store and take a gander at my complete line of hats in various sizes (and all the other cool stuff I have) at:

http://stores.ebay.com/JimBobs-American-Excess

If this hat fits your head...

you could get a REALLY GREAT hat REALLY CHEAP!!!

This auction starts at just 50 cents!!!

And the BUY-IT-NOW price is ONLY $20!!!

HOW GREAT IS THAT?!?!

Believe it or not,

this is a used surplus military drill instructor's hat, AKA a Smokey-the-Bear hat.

I bought this hat from:

Ft. Jackson South Carolina the home of the

U.S. Army Training Center!

It may also have a chin strap too! (There is a little slot on each side of the hat at the brim for a chin strap)

OK, you say, this hat looks NOTHING LIKE one of those flat-rimmed round hats.

What's up with that?

This is a fur felt hat!

That's what's up with that!

If you don't know, this is the VERY BEST hat felt ever made!

Many of the "felt" hats that you see are wool felt hats.

WOOL FELT SUCKS when compared to FUR FELT!

AND it is a NICE THICK felt too!

If you INSIST on keeping it flat and round like a drill instructor, you can.

They even make forms to keep the hat on so it'll keep it's military-snappy stiff look!

But HEY! Who's a Drill Instructor?

Not many people are... only a special chosen few!

AND why should they be the only ones that can wear these REALLY GREAT HATS?

Well, my friend, I have been wearing fur felt fedoras in all kinds of weather since 1978... that's 25 years... and I'm here to tell you that if you are going to be outside in bad weather, you need a hat like this!

Out in the woods? YOU need a fur felt hat!

Get it wet and it'll still keep you warm.

When you get to where you are going, take it off, set it out in the room with the brim hanging over the edge of the fireplace mantle and

BANG!

The next morning it's dry and ready for more!

If you remember nothing else in life, remember this:

Baseball caps are for WIMPS!

You don't want to be no TomHanks/StevenSpielburg-Lookin-Baseball-Cap-Wearin' MetroSexual!

Hell, NO!

This is AMERICA!

YOU need a FUR FELT HAT!

Why?

You can reshape it to suit your needs.

It's called reblocking but it's really easy!

Look at pictures numbered 1, 2, 3, and 4.

Your hat will come in the shape seen in picture 1.

If you want to change your hat from the strictly military shape, you will need to reblock it.

You got a steam kettle and a stove?

Put water in that puppy, fire it up and wait for the steam...

AFTER making some really strong coffee (coffee first, then hat)...

WARNING!!

DO NOT MAKE TEA WITH THIS HOT WATER!

In the first place, tea is just plain WRONG for this operation!

THIS AIN'T NO TEA KINDA HAT!

If you make TEA you gotta START OVER!

SO GET IT RIGHT THE FIRST TIME!

Well, like I said, use the hot water to make some strong coffee and then use the rest of the water to make steam to reblock your hat.

THEN hold your hat in the steam.

CAREFUL there DUDE! Steam is HOT!

But hold your hat in the steam for a while and it will loosen up.

You can leave the crown in its original shape... that's called a Montana Peak for reasons that should be OBVIOUS!

OR... you can make the crown (that's the middle part that actually covers your head) a dome shape as seen in picture 2...

OR... you can put a crease in it as seen in picture 3.

OR... you can put a pinch in the crease as seen in picture 4.

Well ANYWAYS... what ever shape you put it in when it is warm and steamy, it will stay in when it is dry.

You can curl the brim as seen in picture 4 by slightly elongating the head hole.

How GREAT is that?

OK, you say, What size do I need?

Go and hunt up a cloth measuring tape...

HINT: Your wife is hiding a perfectly good one in her sewing box/bag thing. Hunt for this thing in the vicinity of the sewing machine she hides in her "sewing room".

If that isn't an option, KMart or Walmart will have them cheap.

EVEN CHEAPER THAN THAT...

Take your jobsite measuring tape and mark off about 26 inches, in 1/8 inch increments on a piece of paper... then cut it out about 1 inch wide and

BANG!

You got a measuring tape!

OK, so why don't I just wrap my jobsite measuring tape around my head and cut out a step?

Go ahead GENIUS!

BUT when that sucker gets loose, slams back into it's hiding place, and cuts your nose off...

DON'T COME CRYING TO ME!

AND... more practically, a measuring tape has a curve in it to make it stiff so you can measure things that are 20 feet long.

IT AIN'T SO GOOD FOR GOING AROUND SMALL ROUND THINGS

...like YOUR HEAD!

Measure around your big 'ol noggin, just above the ears and eyebrows... YOU KNOW... where a HAT would be when it is put on your head.

Take the measurement and pick the size according to the chart below

(it ain't perfect, but it's pretty good. It worked for my head measurement. I measured 24 inches and I wear a 7 5/8 hat!):

If your noggin measures 20 3/8 inches you need a 6 1/2 hat

If your noggin measures 20 3/4 inches you need a 6 5/8 hat

If your noggin measures 21 1/8 inches you need a 6 3/4 hat

If your noggin measures 21 1/2 inches you need a 6 7/8 hat

If your noggin measures 21 7/8 inches you need a 7 hat

If your noggin measures 22 1/4 inches you need a 7 1/8 hat

If your noggin measures 22 5/8 inches you need a 7 1/4 hat

If your noggin measures 23 inches you need a 7 3/8 hat

If your noggin measures 23 1/2 inches you need a 7 1/2 hat

If your noggin measures 23 7/8 inches you need a 7 5/8 hat

If your noggin measures 24 1/4 inches you need a 7 3/4 hat

If your noggin measures 24 5/8inches you need a 7 7/8 hat

If your noggin measures 24 3/4inches DAMN YOU GOTTA BIG HEAD! Better go find a spackle bucket and cut it to fit!

Finally, there are mail order internet places that will resize it for you too! (and reblock it and reband it and reline it and clean it... you name it, they will do it!) You can usually resize a hat to the next size pretty easily.

Mike the Hatter at:

http://www.mikethehatter.com/HatCleaning.asp

is just one that is available!

FINALLY (again!)...

You might be able to tell that I LOVE THIS HAT!

I do and I wear it!

Oh... and they are all green, not a bad green, but a really REALLY nice green!

ANY QUESTIONS?

EMAIL ME!

I ship to the lower 48 states

from the

GREAT STATE of GEORGIA!

Use the shipping calculator to figure out how much shipping will cost you.

Outside the lower 48 states? Make arrangements before you bid!

You can calculate how much the shipping will be by putting your zip code into the shipping calculator located on this page.

ok, Ok, OK!!!

Quit your whining!

SO many of you want me to reblock your hat for you that I'm gonna cave in...

But it AIN'T GONNA BE FREE!

If you don't want to have a little fun, live on the wild side and take a CHANCE... Who am I to blame you?

SO... if you insist, pick a number 1-4 (like in the picture) and send me an EXTRA $10.

Mind you, I'll have to sneak it in while the wife is out of the house... (she doesn't like me "running your stupid, smelly, science experiments where I have to slave to fix the family nutritious, wholesome meals"... but for $10 I'll live with it.

THANKS FOR TAKING THE TIME TO READ THIS SILLY AD!