HOW TO WEIGH A FAT LADY

SMALL TOWN HORSE PLAY

Some time around 1900, there was a rather portly, maybe one could say downright pudgy, young lady whose weight was the subject of many discussions among the young bachelors of Birmingham. They were all very curious to know exactly how heavy she was, but none had the audacity to come right out and ask her.

John Bayley, an ingenious fellow whose grandfather had lived on Saginaw St. next door to the home of pioneer John West Hunter, decided to solve the mystery of the hefty lass's poundage once and for all.

On a brisk winter's day he asked her to go for a drive with him in a fancy horse drawn cutter. After a pleasant ride around the Village with sleigh bells ringing in their ears, John made an excuse to stop for a moment at his brother-in-law's coal and lumber yard. The young lady didn't notice that John was very careful to park the sleigh directly on the scale used by proprietor Edward Smith to weigh loads of coal prior to their delivery.

During a few moments of supposdly idle chatter in the office, Mr. Smith discreetly weighed the cutter and its portly feminine contents. John then returned to the sleigh and drove his unsuspecting passenger back to her home.

Just as soon as he could politely take his leave, John rushed back to the scale so that the cutter, minus its former passenger could be reweighed. Needless to say, it wasn't long before the exact figure concerning a certain damsel's weight was no longer a matter of conjecture among the local menfolk.

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