Physical Sensation of Being in Debt

The word debt conjures up images of debtors burdened with stone shackles or heavy rocks trudging up a hill. Being in debt is not connected directly to the physical, and yet there are sensations that come with being in debt – of feeling heavy, or walking under water. One cannot argue that being in the red feels different to being in the black. From this, it would appear that money problems do indeed affect the physical as well as the psychological.

What Repossession Feels Like

My story follows the fate of a woman in danger of losing her home to sinister moneylenders who are chasing her husband’s gambling debt. Gemma does not know the identity of the creditors, nor does she know the location of her husband. She is left helpless, fighting a force she cannot see or touch. The painting on the left, A Korzukhin Collecting Arrears shows a debt collector turning up at a woman's house to collect her dues. Notice how desperate she looks; she has a young child too.

Rather than use the stereotypical symbol of the debtor weighed down with stones, I used a different set of concrete sensations that are associated with a loss of control and which can be imagined by the reader.

Visualization of Debt

Gemma starts to imagine dark dust congregating at hidden corners of her house. This spurs her to clean obsessively, only to feel the dust return. Her attempt seems futile. This sensation of losing control over her home can more clearly be conveyed to the reader by using such concrete sensations, as can be seen from the following excerpt from Falling Awake:

Suddenly the house seemed to cosset opportunities for dust to congregate: the tops of the kitchen wall-units; the curtain railing, the cubbyhole above the back door. Every little community would bloom from the cracks in the walls and reach out tendrils to become larger communities. Gemma dusted twice a day yet the notion of unseen dust persisted – dark dust she would forever overlook. An odd concoction of despair and false assurance crept within her. Gemma took care not to look too hard or she would find. Her domestic province seemed on condition; the parts she couldn’t see had unknown proportions and seemed to be slipping away from her.

Here, we can picture the dust creeping through the hidden crevasses of the house; what it would look and feel like, and how this symbolizes the futile battle between creditor and debtor as her house slips through her fingers.

How to Describe Debt Stress

Debt is a more complex existence than this four-lettered word would imply; the dictionary describes it as a sum that is owed. Similarly, the stereotypical view of being in debt seems rather flippant as we view cartoons of some poor soul lugging stones up a hill. But in reality, everyone experiences debt in different ways which may manifest itself in physical ailments or sensations. I decided to use concrete descriptions of what it feels like to watch your house slip away. This unique experience would help make Gemma’s predicament more convincing to readers.

Excerpt from Falling Awake Charles J Harwood

Copyright is asserted © 2012

Other themes relating to this novel

Unique experiences of an insomniac

Cynic's view of office politics

Stories with taboo themes

Stories with hidden messages

Gambling addiction and operant behaviorism

Other articles

Great character contrasts in stories

The Stockholm syndrome relationship

References

Still in the Red Update on debt and mental health (Mind, 2013)

No Health without Mental Health (Mind, 2013)

NBC News Health: Debt Stress Causing Health Problems (2013)

Oxford English Dictionary

Image details: Alexei Ivanovich Korzukhin (1835–1894) A Korzukhin Collecting Arrears

Debt Psychology

Having your debt paid off can leave you feeling light and liberated, where owing money, particularly a high-interest loan is a more torpid existence, like dragging a huge stone up an endless hill. According to Mind’s report, In the Red, Debt and Mental Health (2013) there is a clear link between money worries, depression and physical niggles. 1 in 4 people with mental health problems live with debt, which could be a catalyst or as a consequence.

How Debt Damages Health

Mind and body are well known to be connected, and according to a report on the NCB News, Debt Stress Causing Health Problems, people living with debt do indeed report various medical problems including ulcers, migraines and digestive tract problems. All such ailments occur above the national average; 44% of debtors suffer migraines for instance where the national average is 15%. The average incidence of muscle tension is 31% yet this is as high as 51% for those in debt stress. How can it be, that such a simple definition of debt: ‘a sum of money that is owed’, can cause such private anguish?

Sensations of Insolvency

So what does it feel like to be in debt? Sadly, I have experienced such a miserable situation. To the outside world, the debtor might appear to be a fully functioning adult holding down a job and carrying out everyday duties, but at the back of the mind, money worries keep niggling. Now and again, these worries can be pushed away, but nighttime is a time to be aware of. Ultimately, serious debts will always come back to haunt you. In the long run, it can be as wearing as any expenditure of energy. Things look grey and hope for the future grows bleak. Thankfully, this is no longer my situation, but I was able to source my feelings of being in debt for one of my writing projects, a novel.