Back-To-School Tips
Happy New (School) Year!
Is your child feeling worried about going back to school? They're not alone. Kids of all ages have mixed emotions about the transition from summer break to the start of the new school year. They are bound to be excited, as well as nervous. Here are some resources that may help ease those worries and help kids look forward to all the new school year has to offer!
Back-To-School Books
Here are some of my favorite books for back-to-school. For books on entering kindergarten, check out the Kindergarten Transition page of this website.
I GOT THE SCHOOL SPIRIT
In this book by Connie Schofield-Morrison, a kid feels the school spirit in all she does, from being a friend, taking deep breaths to calm her nerves, play at recess, and learn in class.
I will Be fierce
In this story by Bea Birdsong, the protagonist wakes up and decides that today she will be fierce and show courage, confidence, and kindness in all she does at school, and that tomorrow she will do just the same.
The Day You Begin
This book reminds us to celebrate our differences, learn from each other, and to find connections
Butterflies on the first day of School
As the first day of school progresses, the butterflies in Rosie's tummy go away.
Our Class is a Family
Our Class is a Family by Shannon Olsen explains to kids how classrooms are a type of family - it's okay to be yourself, to make mistakes and learn from them, and to give and receive kindness and respect.
A Letter From Your Teacher on the first day of school
This book is a letter, written by Shannon Olsen, meant to represent the love, joy, and hope teachers feel for their students and the year ahead.
Listen and validate Feelings
When your child is feeling calm and you have some time to talk, ask them how they are feeling about going back to school. This doesn’t need to be a serious, sit-down, long conversation, though it can be. You know your child best and what works for them. Hang out on the couch. Go for a walk. Talk in the car on the way to run an errand. Sometimes the distraction of going on a walk or drive helps kids be more likely to open up.
Listen to your child. Use non-verbal cues to show you are listening. Paraphrase what they said to make sure you have it right. Remind them that any and all feelings they have about going back are okay. Some feelings like happy are comfortable, while others like nervous and scared are uncomfortable. Nevertheless, all feelings are okay.
When a child is worried, our first instinct may be to reassure them and say something like, “There’s nothing to worry about! Everything will be fine!” However, if we instead validate children’s feelings by acknowledging them and showing that we understand, that we are there for them, and that we have confidence in them, this helps them feel heard, understood, and secure. “I see that you’re feeling nervous about going back to school. Everyone feels nervous sometimes. I believe in you, and we will get through this together!”
Identify specific worries
Many kids worry about something when it comes to the new school year. After all, it is hard to go into the “unknown.” Will I know anyone in my class? What will my teacher be like? What if I have no one to play with? What if someone’s mean to me? What are the class rules? What will we learn about? What if I don’t understand what we’re learning about? What if I’m really missing home?
When talking with your child about worries, avoid asking leading questions such as, “Are you worried math will be hard this year?” and “Are you worried you won’t know anyone in your class?” Instead, ask questions in a neutral or positive way, such as “Is there anything in particular about school you that is worrying you?” and “Do you know who you might play with at recess?” As you talk with your child, continue to validate feelings.
If your child is worried about being away from you, some of the following strategies may be helpful:
Read The Kissing Hand by Audrey Penn and The Invisible String by Patrice Karst. These books share the message that even when we are separated from the ones we love, we are still connected. Drawing a heart on your hand and your child’s hand can be a sweet reminder that you are connected no matter where you are.
Try a worry stone, a smooth rock that your child can rub when feeling nervous.
Tuck a sweet note in their lunchbox or backpack.
Check out the Separation Anxiety and Coping Skills page of this website.
Build Helpful Self-Talk and focus on the positives
When your child is feeling worried, their mind may be swimming with unhelpful self-talk. These are thoughts that may not be true, that make you feel sad and worried, and don’t help you. “I won’t know how to do the math. It will be too hard.” “I won’t know anyone in my class.”
Work with your child to help them replace that unhelpful self-talk with helpful self-talk that acknowledges their feelings and helps give them hope. Big Life Journal has an article on handling back-to-school anxiety. They suggest taking a piece of paper, and on one side, you and your child write down their worry (unhelpful) thoughts, and on the other side you can write down happy (helpful) thoughts to replace it. For example, “I won’t know anyone in my class.” can be replaced with “I may not know anyone in class, but I can meet new kids and make friends.” “I won’t know how to do the math.” can be replaced with “The math may be hard, but I can practice and ask for help.”
Another way to help your child shift their mindset is by brainstorming all the fun things they have loved in the past about school and all the things they are looking forward to this school-year. It may help to books about kids who are looking forward to going back to school, such as Today I Will Be Fierce! by Bea Birdsong and I Got The School Spirit by Connie Schofield-Morrison. You can also plan some extra things they can look forward to, such as a yummy snack for lunchtime, a special note in their backpack, or a fun activity at the end of the week.
For more information on helpful thinking and positive attitude, check out the Growth Mindset and Positive Attitude pages of this website.
Fine-Tune Routines
During the summer, routines tend to be much more flexible; however, following routines can help kids know what to expect, prepare for the day, and wind down to get a good night's sleep. Here are some ideas:
Plan the Night Before - For a smoother morning, do some preparation the night before. Help or have your child pick out their outfit for the next day and take a shower or bath. Make sure any necessary work for school is done. Pack backpacks with work, supplies, and forms to return to school.
Morning Checklist - It can be helpful to include your child in creating a schedule for their morning routine so they have a sense of ownership and understand the game plan. For younger kids, you may try using a picture schedule. Older kids may do well with a checklist.
Stay Organized - It can be helpful to designate certain spots for things your child will need to have ready for the morning, such as their backpack, coat, lunch, and so on.
Looking For More? - Check out the Morning Routines and Bedtime Routines pages of this website for more ideas and resources.
Reach Out
If you need any support with the transition back to school, please do not hesitate to reach out to us at Battle Creek. We are a team and we are here to support you and your child!