SHREX

Once upon a time there was a lovely woman named Skinya Shimmah. Her previous lover left her for another more youthful woman named Dileyedo Vibratah. Dileyedo had stunning features like big boobs and a big hairy cylinder for a special somebody once told me ;).

Fiona left Shek and had taken the kids with her. She left beacuse of Shrek's crippling porn addiction. That and also heroin. She’d bees gone for nearly 8 months now, and she was still the only thing he could think about. He didn’t really miss the kids very much tho. He was actually kind of glad that there stupid little goblin monkey faces where out of his life. Without them, he could get higher than he’s ever been. So the day he decided to go to the nude beach on glenjamin Dr, no one was surprised.

Skinya was crying on a curb, mourning the loss of her mans, in a not so great part of town, when Shrex walks by.

SHREK: Hey laday, how much?

SKINYA: Oh… no, i'm not a prostitute…

SKREK: *awkwardly, but the really hot kind of awkward* oh…

Skinnya: …

SKINYAH: $50

They awkwardly sat at a bus stop and waited till 4:30pm for the next bus to come. Shrek rubbed Skinya’s upper thigh. He looked at her crotch expecting it to be a normal crotch but in fact she was already soaked.

ShrEk: Wow you are already wet ;)

Snikya:... Ya sure… I’m wet. *blushes*

Srhek: WAIT! OHHHH that Smell!!!! AHhh Ohhhh aHHHH *bulgey wolgey breaks pant* Did you pee yourself?

Skinya, embarrassed runs off twards the gay bathhouse. She ran in there seeing as it was the closest building. Shrek ran after her. She felt a chill run down her spine as she realized where she is. She immediately got hustled into a asian orgy. Skinya immediately gets penetrated by a very handsome man named Mule. He had short brownish grey hair and stunning facial hair. He had a long face but that just accentuated his sexy features. She moaned loudly as he went in and out. Shrek grabbed her

Shrek: If you are going to fuck him for free. You’ll fuck all of us for free!

Asians: Yeah!

Skinya: You guys! Sex is not supposed to be just for fun! It is supposed to for love and healthy relationships and for couples wanting kids, not G A Y S!

The room went silent… A hairy man stood up and walked towards Skinya. He looked in her large brown eyes

Hairly man: What is youre name young blood

Skinya: Skinya, Skinya Luaral Shimmah.

Hairy man: EVERYONE IN THE ROOM GIVE IT UP FOR SKINYA LUARAL SHIMMAH! SHE IS WHITE AND FEMALE AND SHE IS TELLING A BUNCH OF GAY ASIANS WHAT TO DO. Do you know who I am Skinya Luaral?

Skinya: no…

Hairy man: I am your 17th cousin twice removed

Skinya: 😳 😳😳

Skinya senses that she is in danger and runs off but now cant remember how to get out. The place she is in is almost a labyrinth. She reaches the end of the hall. Shrek was right behind her... He took her hand and picked her up and he ran to the Asians.

Shrek: I got her!

They all had malicious grins on their faces. He dropped her and the asians grabbed her. Skinya screamed as they plucked out each of of her hairs individually. Shrek saw her pained expression and felt sympathy for her once. He grabs her from the Asians and ran. The chanced after Shrek grabbed his ankle and he fell. Shrek tuck and rolled as to not put Skinya in anymore pain then she was already in. he rolled his way out of the gay bathhouse while carrying her like a baby. The sun was down by now and thanks to Shrek's night vision it was all good. He slowed down his running.

Skynya: That you so much sir

Shrek: Can I have a 50% off coupon?

Skinya: 50% off what?

Shrek: remember you were gonna give me a $50 knobber

Skinya: ...