The speaker in Cousin Kate was lured away by a lord. His magnificence and place in life probably made her feel intimidated. Her whole life, she was taught that a woman’s role was to obey men, especially a man in a position of authority. Thus, when the lord sought her out, it was natural for her to obey. Her cousin, Kate, watched the whole thing. Then, when the lord was tired of the speaker, once the speaker has fallen pregnant with the lord's illegitimate child, he went after her cousin, Kate.
Kate, having seen her cousin brought to shame by the lord, denied him sexually and remained chaste. Because she did this, the lord married her, and she was brought to a place of honour while her poor cousin was destined to live the rest of her life in shame, raising the child that she had bore with the lord but which he now negates due to the child being born out of wedlock. The speaker closes by discussing how Kate is unable to have children herself and therefore will never be able to give the lord an heir.
Patriarchal Society
The time period in which this poem, Cousin Kate, was written makes the message all the more meaningful. The writer, Christina Rossetti, was a woman of the Victorian era. Born in 1830, Rossetti lived during a time when women had no choice but to be chaste. Anything else was to be outcast from society. On the other hand, men were known often to use prostitutes as an outlet for their sexuality until (and sometimes after) they were married.
However, during this period, women were also thought to be inferior to men in many ways, including physically and intellectually. However, they were thought to be superior to men morally. Thus, a much higher moral expectation was placed on women. They were thought to have little to no sexual desire aside from for the purpose of becoming a mother. Therefore, when a woman was found out to have had sexual relations outside of marriage, it was treated as something entirely different from when men had premarital sex. It was looked upon as an act of defiance for women against family, society, and God. For men, it was seen as a moment of weakness in which they gave in to an overwhelming sexual desire.
During this time, women were also considered the property of men. They were to obey them. This presented a problem for women. If a Lord, Duke, or perhaps even the King wanted to have a woman sexually, she was expected to obey him. And when he was done using her, she bore the shame of losing her virginity before the marriage. This poem speaks to that exact kind of circumstance.
Christina Rossetti
Given the author’s background, Cousin Kate is somewhat ironic. One might expect to find that Rossetti had once been in the same position as the speaker, but it does not appear so. From what is known about Rossetti, she was a highly religious woman who never married and even broke off an engagement because her fiancé had become a Roman Catholic. She was a loyal member of the Anglican church. Perhaps her adherence to her beliefs led her to this kind of sympathy for a woman in the position of the speaker of Cousin Kate. After all, Jesus himself had a heart for the woman who was caught in the very act of prostitution.
Likewise, though seemingly pious and religious, Rossetti shows sympathy for her fellow women who were not so fortunate as to have escaped being lured in by a man. Her poem particularly shows sympathy for women and the skepticism of men. The man in Cousin Kate is clearly vile, and the women are at his mercy. Perhaps this fear of men and their power over women is what lead Rossetti to remain single, though she received two offers of marriage.
Christina Rossetti received a second offer of marriage – her suitor in this instance, being a man of letters and pre-eminently a scholar. Again, she was favorably disposed to her suitor and again actuated by religious scruples, and she was constrained to reject his offer (Bell).
This reveals that the author had probably been in love more than once in her life, but that she was afraid to do the wrong thing and sought to adhere to the church rather than marry when she was not sure that it was entirely right to do so. Although the author could not entirely identify with her speaker in Cousin Kate, she clearly was able to have empathy for all the women in her society who had given in to their passions and been ruined by them. Cousin Kate also reveals the fear that she may end up cast aside if she responds to her suitors.