Meeting Resource

Meeting Structure

Introduction:

• Facilitator introduces the meeting & rules
• Meeting code issued by facilitator; attendee's sign in at www.pbb.family
• Empty chair (1 min silence)

First half:

• Welcome statement
• Take turns (no interruptions) sharing whats going on for us, how we feel.
• Pause to reflect on whats just been shared between attendees

10 mins break

Second half:

• 2nd half statement & structured group discussion or,
• Workshop on relevant subject

Check out & close

Host Preparation

• The meeting host should be on a computer (not mobile phone).
• Log into Zoom (20 mins before start):
• Log into your allocated PBB Zoom account (zoom6 for swsphn)
  • Select your meeting
  • Start the Zoom meeting session:
  • "Start Meeting"
  • "Join with Computer Audio"
  • Check your Audio
  • "Manage Participants"
• Welcome attendees:
  • As people start to connect, they will appear in the "waiting room"
  • Check that their displayed name is correct
  • "Admit" them into the meeting from waiting room
  • Test everyone's AV
  • Check that everyone has video turned on
  • Check that everyone can hear you
  • Check that everyone can be heard
  • Start on Time
  • Announce meeting is beginning
  • Put participants on mute
  • Start with the Meeting Rules (section 1)

1. Meeting Rules

• Sign in at www.pbb.family using the 3 digit code below.

• 201 for Saturday morning online group
• 203 for Monday evening online group

• Meeting are CONFIDENTIAL! Strictly, no recording of any kind.
• To avoid speakers being interrupted, once the meeting starts, new attendees are not admitted
• Be in a quiet space away from others (especially kids) and always stay on mute unless talking.
• If leaving early, let a facilitator know. We just want to know you're okay.
• Be present for others. i.e. no web browsing, TV, texting or chatting in the background.
• Phones on silent..

2. The Empty Chair (1 min silence)

We mark one minute of silence to think about those who couldn't be with us today.

In a way, they are with and amongst us by occupying the 'empty' chair.

• Maybe they do not know that we are here to help them yet.

• Maybe they cannot yet cope with reaching out for help.

• Maybe they are no longer with us.

• Maybe they are at the other side of their journey and no longer attend the meetings.

• Maybe, today they are having a good day.

The empty chair is also an invitation to new members to join us

Take this minute to think about the empty chair, and about what you'd like to share when your turn comes around.

3. Welcome Statement

Shared just ahead of the first half / sharing circle

Usually 'guest read' by an attendee

"Welcome to our meeting.

Please join us in helping to make it a different place in our lives. It has a different purpose to the rest of our lives.

Here, between the time we form our check-in circle and the time we check-out at the end of the group, we give one another a lot more time to be ourselves than we usually get.

At first it can feel uncomfortable as it is rare to have such an opportunity.

Here we really listen to each other, or at least we don’t interrupt or jump in quick to say our piece or even give what we may think is just the best and most important piece of advice.

Instead we give respectful attention. We don’t try to rescue someone who is feeling sad or feeling anything because we know that really they are okay. Or maybe we still have to learn—that really—they are okay.

Here, we get to know ourselves. We get to really hear ourselves and one another, without the usual distractions.

The simple way we do it is not easy to begin with, but it soon will be. We simply take our turn in going round the circle leaving space between, and instead of jumping in with whatever we may feel; we sit quietly with our feelings, just letting them be, until our turn comes round again.

Soon enough we will be ordinary with one another again, but maybe not as ordinary as we were before.

Welcome."

4. Sharing Circle

The facilitator will hand out the 'virtual' rock to signify who shares, one at a time.

Sharing is optional. If you'd rather not share, just say that when you are invited.

Allow the person sharing to do so uninterrupted; remain silent (muted) until it is your turn to share.

We have a respectful pause between sharers to consider what it is they just said. Thumbs up 👍 to thank the sharer.

If you are a regular, maybe focus on what is happened for you since the last meeting.

If it's your first time, feel free to share as long as you need and start with your name, kids names and ages.

5. Ten Minute Break

Back in 10 minutes - actual times will vary by attendee timezone

Switch off cameras and mute yourself during the break

Use the time to think of questions / subjects for the 2nd half.

6. Second Half Opening Statement

OPTIONAL

• Shared just ahead of second half commencing

• Usually 'guest read' by an attendee

“We have arrived at the 2nd Part of the meeting. Experience shows that the best outcomes are gained by having a positive focus, rather than negative collusive energy between attendees.

Recognising that the only thing I have control over is myself; not the system, nor past relationships or past choices, not other people, nor even my past behaviours - only my actions into the future, the second part of the meeting is for us to respectfully share relevant experiences to help each other move forward.

We are not here to teach or advise, but to offer alternatives, to share wisdom, not anger. To keep ourselves level we watch the language we use, and build on our strengths, not our problems.”

7. End of Meeting Check Out

Each take a turn sharing 1-3 pieces of information:

• One word (or very brief statement) how you felt coming into tonight's meeting

• One word (or very brief statement) how you feel now as the meeting comes to an end

Alternatively, one thing that you:

• Will take away with you that you have learned tonight, or

• Will focus on this coming week, ahead of the next meeting, or

• Will do for your own self-care, or

• Are grateful for at this time.

8. Meeting Close

Join the meeting next week.

Take a look at our other meeting locations and services - www.peersupport.men

Additional help:

- Lifeline 13 11 14

- Mentoring Men