Building Family Relationships to Improve Involvement

Smile When You See Parents/Guardians- Most parents/guardians only interact with teachers occasionally so make sure that your encounters with them are positive, warm, and friendly. Smile at them in the office and greet them in the hall. The impressions left from fleeting encounters often last a long time.

Learn Their Names (where possible) - If you have a self-contained class or have consistent volunteers, knowing them by name can help build a strong connection. Learn how they like to be addressed (ie. Mr., Mrs., Señora, first name, etc.) and how to pronounce their name(s) correctly.

Declare Your Intention - Let parents/guardians know that you want to partner with them, that you appreciate their support, and look forward to working together.

Communicate Often and in Various Forms - Providing information about what's going on in your class can create transparency between home and school. Sharing information about what students are learning, what they've accomplished, what you're excited about, what they're excited about, and the learning and growth you're seeing is important. Suggest things that they might ask their child about: "Ask them to tell you about what they learned last week about meal worms," or "Ask them to read you the haiku they wrote."

Make a Positive Phone Call Home - It's important to connect with families early so calling all houses within the first couple of weeks is a great way to build a personal connection. Make certain to continue that connection through the school year. "Catching" a student doing something positive and sharing that information let's families know that you are attuned to what's going on with their child and making the effort to share the good (and the bad).

Lead with the Good News - When communication with a family, always find something positive to start the conversation. Give praise first when calling parents/guardians or meeting with them to discuss a concern. Every kid has something good about him/her. Find it. Share it. Then share your concern. Adhere strictly to this rule.

Find a Translator - If you can't speak their language, contact the Director of Pupil Personnel Services for a translator for at least one parent conference and/or phone call. (For obscure languages, you can sometimes find a refugee center or other public agency that can help). Reach out to those parents/guardians as well; do whatever you can to connect.

Your Language is Powerful - Using proper language to communicate conveys an awareness that there are many different kinds of families. Recognizing that families may have one parent, two parents, a guardian, and varied genders within each role, it's really important not to make assumptions (same-sex marriage, identifies as a different gender, etc.). Learn to ask open-ended questions and understand that sometimes parents/guardians might not want to share some information.

Ask Questions about the Child - Demonstrate an interest in knowing your student beyond the classroom. "What kinds of things does (s)he enjoy doing outside of school? Who are the special people in his/her life -- family or family friends? What do you think are his/her best characteristics? What was (s)he like as a toddler?" Enlisting parents by asking for their expertise on their child can prove very beneficial. Relying on a parent's knowledge of their child can help you determine student strengths & weaknesses, skills & hobbies, which can help students meet with better success in the classroom.

Help Parents/Guardians Feel Listened To - Parents/guardians know a whole lot about their child. It is invaluable to really listen to what they have to say about their child. They are the expert! Additionally, whether they call with a question about an assignment or an email about a family situation, helping families feel as though you're listening and receptive can help forge the relationship. If a parent makes a suggestion or reaches out regarding an issue, make sure that you provide them with feedback.

Invite Parents/Guardians to Share - Find out what parents/guardians know about and what skills and hobbies they have through a start-of-the-year survey. Be thoughtful of non-English reading/writing folks and look for translation tools or other creative ways to encourage participation (have the child interview their parent(s) and record answers). Invite them in especially if it connects to the curriculum and content. Let them share with you their cultural traditions, interests, passions, skills, knowledge and/or career.

Let Parents/Guardians Know How They Can Help - Many want to help but don't feel like they have anything to offer, or aren't asked for help and don't know what to do. Utilizing the survey mentioned above will help guide you in inviting parents/guardian into your classroom. There's always some way they can help in the classroom! And let's face it...education has changed a lot since many of our families were in school. Helping parents/guardians understand homework or a project can close gaps. If they understand the process or expectation they can better support their child.

Be Very Specific - Provide suggestions with methods that parents/guardians can use to support their child at home. Suggestions about the type of questions to ask and their value can help empower parents/guardians to become your partner. "You can help your child with her math homework by asking her to explain how she got an answer," or "As you're reading stories at night, ask your child to make predictions. This strengthens reading comprehension."

Be a Broker of Resources - If a parent shares a concern, be prepared to point them to a direction where they can find help. If you don't know an answer, make certain to follow up with colleagues and administration and get back to the parent. If you share a concern ("Your daughter spaces out and doesn't pay attention") be prepared to offer a suggestion as to what the parents/guardians can do.

Explain Your Instructional Decisions - Many parents/guardians don't know that teachers are required to teach a certain curriculum or what that curriculum includes. Take the time to help parents/guardians learn about the education system if they're not familiar with it. Help them understand what you're doing and why. Invite parents/guardians to watch your class, in-person or virtually, so that they can see first-hand the wonderful things that happen in your classroom.

Invite Parents/Guardians to Participate in Making Some Decisions - Partnering with parents/guardians to make decisions shows a true partnership. Invite their input, give them information that will help them form an opinion, and listen to their conclusions.

Thank Parents/Guardians - Share your gratitude for parents/guardians, both individually and publicly for their support. Weekly newsletters or emails are a great place to thank parents/guardians. Recognizing what they do to help your class and how it's impacting students can help parents/guardians gain confidence and adds value to their participation.

Share Every Success - Let parents/guardians know what their child is doing well, what academic skills, social skills or knowledge he's mastered. These quick emails or phone calls are important.