I find her sometimes

In crooked hallways 

Or crooked teeth

Shirts from the 2000s

With tank-tops underneath

I find her at a lunch table 

with a diary where she keeps

Doodles of sideway faces

And poems about how skies weep

She wrote them crooked from the tilt of her paper sheets

I find it funny the way she holds her papers

Never straight and sometimes creased

No matter her posture or table or seat

She holds her papers exactly 23.5 degrees

I find her sometimes

In the depths of my dreams

Where I lost my retainer 

And twisted my teeth

Sometimes I find her

In the Christmas list that reads:

"Everyone has black leggings, 

I think I need these."

"I want sweaters with simple words

And white drawstrings."

She wrote them crooked from the tilt of her paper sheets.

And I find myself thinking

What if it wasn’t her posture or table or seat

What if it was the Earth

That was tilted 23.5 degrees?

That every face that she comes across

And every person she’ll ever meet

Is sideways and crooked

With tight jaws and straight teeth

Today, I found her diary where she keeps

Doodles of sideway faces

And poems about how skies weep

And I cry because I know 

That one day she'll leave

And in her place

Will be me.  

Author’s Note:  As I look back on the seventeen years of my existence, I become nostalgic for simpler days.  It’s an unidentifiable emotion, somewhere between bitter and sweet.  This poem is dedicated to those grieving for a time in their lives to which they can never return.

(The lyrics in this piece are from Taylor Swift’s song “Out of the Woods.”)

One stormy, cold December night, a girl felt like she was running for her life. The girl endured the feeling of feeling like she was running away from a monster but not your typical monster. This monster looked and sounded human most of the time, but her actions and outbursts suggested otherwise. Occasionally, she would go on out-of-the-blue rampages, screaming, crying, and throwing things. This was very erratic behavior compared to the typical human, so the girl knew her only option was to run away. 

As the girl ran out of the blue house, she started to tremble over the sticks and stones outside the door. She felt the pellets of rain falling on her long, dark, curly brown hair. She noticed that outside of her house, there were only two paths. One path was a main road that could risk her getting hit by a car and the other path was to the Woods of Wonder. She reluctantly chose the path to the Woods of Wonder and promised herself to never look back towards that monster. 

As she entered the woods, she saw scary creatures. For example, she saw a tiny green animal that almost looked like a caterpillar but with teeth and more speed. The caterpillar hissed at her similar to the way the monster yelled. This brought back tragic memories of the monster, but the girl decided to keep walking knowing this path was her only way out. As the girl kept walking, she began to see more creatures that reminded her of the monster. She felt as if there were a Polaroid of her and the monster, and it could not be ripped up from her memory. She almost felt as if the monster were controlling her thoughts and forcing her to relay everything back to the monster. 

Her favorite song lyrics were even being relayed back to the monster by force. The girl kept hearing, “Looking at it now, it all seems so simple. We were lying on your couch. I remember you took a Polaroid of us.” 

Then she heard, “The rest of the world was black and white but we were in screaming color.” 

The girl was being forced to think about the time when she and the monster were completely fine but then everything changed. The monster turned colorful with her actions and words which led to the girl snapping and being colorful back. They were the most colorful out of everyone in the world, but afterward, the girl only felt black. She felt sad and alone and wondered what she did wrong to deserve the monster's wrath. 

She kept walking as she had this tragic thought, but then she noticed she was out of the woods. It was no longer dark and cold, and most importantly, there were no longer trees or creepy creatures surrounding her and the path. Instead, she saw bright lights surrounding her along with people. They were ordinary, normal people. She also saw a big city. It looked like Manhattan. 

A kind stranger said “Hello” to her and she said “Hello” back. 

The girl finally thought, “I’m out of the woods.”

It was once thought that mermaids were creators for the translucent, rock-like formations that became stranded on shore, known as sea glass.  They are fabled to be the tears of these mythological creatures as they lamented the sailors they couldn’t save, hence their second name, “mermaid tears.” 

Sand

If I am the sand that falls through your fingers

Thank you for chasing the wind to find me

If I am the sand that falls in the ocean

Thank you for suffering the salt of the sea

If I am the sand that lines the horizon

Thank you for walking an eternity

For building a castle, a moat, and a throne

For making the world my oyster, my own

If I am the sand that is blown into glass

Thank you for sweeping each time that I cracked

Thank you for letting the daunting waves pass

For guiding me through each tumbling crash

If not for you, I would still be sand

Never held by your warm hands

I’ll still be on the still, dry land

A single grain, left a strand

Today, I am every shade of sky

Blue, rose pink, jade green, and rye

If I am the tears that rose on high tide

Then, thank you for being the mermaid that cried.