Anonymous Poem

The smell of the “royal pine” lingered through the air

At least it said it was supposed to 

On the small green tree

Dangling from the rearview mirror.

While staring into it, my eyes involuntarily drifted towards the mirror

The sight of demons from my past,

Still haunting my every move,

Reminds me of why I don’t look into it often

My foot is on the gas,

My hands firmly at the steering wheel,

While my eyes barely managed to focus on the long road ahead

I turned the radio up,

With no idea what was on.

Hoping whatever played,

Was enough to drown out the voices.

No matter how far I turned the knob,

Or what kind of stereo I bought,

Nothing was enough

To muffle the screams surrounding my car.

The voices are unpredictable.

Sometimes reassuring,

Others are straight up cruel.

Yet always reminding me how much more I should be.

I know they’re unreliable

But every once in a while,

One of them would speak up amidst the commotion,

And find its way into my mind.

I can always hear what the voices say.

As much as it may bother me,

Typically it’s only noise.

Once past my ears and into my mind,

The story changes.

Whatever words stay inside my head,

Start to affect the road.

It may feel clearer all of a sudden.

Or start making twists and turns with no warning.

The only thing left by that point

It is to wait for the words to pass.

Hoping not much is taken along the way.

As annoying as the voices are,

There is a more intimidating force than the exhaustion of withstanding them.

Whenever I stare into the sky

Searching for answers on where I’m headed,

Clouds bundle up and form darkness across the land,

“Royal pine” is slowly replaced by the smell of fear

At the same time that anxiety takes over the wheel,

She asks where we’re going,

If I’m sure the route is correct,

And if the car was even meant to travel that far

Questions that all hurt because I’ve got no answer.

If you don’t find a way 

Of taking the wheel from her,

She will stay

As long as it takes you

To find one

That’s why right now,

All that matters

And exists for me in this world,

Is the road ahead.

As soon as you give power to anything,

You hand away a driver's license to your life,

Regardless of where I end up,

I’ll be happy if I know,

It was me the one that drove.