RESPONSIVE DISCIPLINE AT HOME
Reinforcing Language - behavior specific praise to help children see the positive impact of their behavior
Nonverbal signals (smile, thumbs up, head nod)
Concrete and specific
Direct and observable
Examples of Reinforcing language
“You worked hard to finish that!”
“You were so kind to each other during the game.”
“I notice that your materials are all put away.”
“You’re ready to go and right on time!”
Reminding language – gestures/prompts to children to remind themselves when they are beginning to get off track
Nonverbal signals (a look, hand signal, head shake, etc.)
Few words
Removal of distracting items
Works best when the expected behavior has been taught and practiced
Examples of Reminding language
“Show me what you do to treat others with respect.”
“What’s your job right now? What does that look like?”
“Show me how you will use your toys to play together.”
“Show me you’re ready to head out the door.”
Redirecting Language – Clear, non-negotiable directions to be used when children clearly off track and need to be stopped and pointed in the direction.
As few words as possible
Matter of fact tone, rather than sarcastic, angry or judgmental
Neutral body language, facial expressions and gestures
Examples of redirecting language
“Daphne, markers are for drawing and writing on paper.”
“Mary, I see you are having trouble focusing on your work. Come sit over here and turn off your tablet.”
“Max, freeze! That looks dangerous. Show me a safer way.”
“Our rules for the kitchen are that dishes will be put away neatly. Please do that now.”
Verbal and Visual Cues
Picture Schedule
Picture representation of our family expectations and/or routines
Sign language
After a reminder or redirection, adults positively reinforce and coach to ensure that the student adjusts his/her behavior.
Designated Cool Down Spots/ Activities
“Calm Down”/ “Peace”/ “Re- Focus/ “Know and Manage” Corner
Relaxing/ regulation space
Give children choice between "take a break" and regulation corner
Provide support around how to use space/ activities/ tools
Family Communication
Teachers communicate with families in numerous ways, and for many reasons. Families should also feel comfortable contacted the school and teacher. Consistent communication between school and home is an essential component of student success. Supportive, positive, and respectful communication between staff and families can have a significant impact on outcomes in the classroom. School staff should always communicate repeated, chronic, or egregious behaviors to families in a timely manner. Similarly, school staff should communicate strengths and student growth. Here are some best practices to keep in mind when communicating with the school:
Focus on your shared goals for your child and remain positive
Communicate insights, including similarities and differences you see in your child's behavior at school and at home
Remember that frequent communication between school at home may be an essential component to your child's success
Logical Consequences
Logical consequences set limits. They focus on the behavior rather than the child’s character. Logical consequences are used as a form of redirection. The consequence must be relevant and respectful to help the child learn for the future. It must also be realistic for the child to do and the adult to follow through on. It is done in a manner that is not punitive or angry, but firmly and matter of fact.
Reparation: Children take responsibility for ‘fixing’, as best they can, any problem/mess they have created.
Go back and walk in the room/home appropriately
Make up missed chores at another time or instead of a preferred activity
Repair or replace damaged items, like fixing a broken object or doing a kind act for someone you have offended
An apology of action; doing an action as an amends beyond “I’m sorry”
Loss of Privilege: Immediate or short term for careless or unsafe behaviors, the adult takes away a related privilege
Temporarily take away a preferred item (toy, game, device) that was misused
Take a break from a preferred activity
Need an adult to supervise until trust is regained
Restorative Practices
Restorative Practices also include repair after harm has been done to a relationship or community
To learn more about Restorative Practices, check out the links below:
Restorative Practices Parent Booklet
6 steps to a restorative conversation VIDEO
Restorative conversations to repair relationships
