Backslash

I am the most famous 12 year old in the United States.

I run my mouth 15 miles an hour

And I step on other like a rug

Because they’re all bugs

And I, and I alone, am the most famous 12 year old in the United States.

A girl walks up to me and asks,

“Marcus, you’re the prettiest boy in the school,

I fell in love with you after a glance

And I want to give you a chance

But I have to ask–

Why must you be so cruel?”

And I told her that it wasn’t her problem,

It was that simple.

I poked my finger into her dimple and

Told her that precisely

Before 3rd period.

Now you may be asking

‘What are you even famous for?’

And I’ll tell you.

Right now.

Later.

Sometime tomorrow.

A day or two from now.

I’m in science now

And we’re learning about the stars

But I tell the teacher that I already am one

And the teacher says,

“Marcus, I’m so sick of you

And your self-righteous rhetoric.

If you know so much about astronomy

Why don’t you teach the class?”

And I tell him

All about the stars

How I’m brighter than Polaris

And how he’s a red supergiant

Because he’s fat.

And he sends me to detention.

But it’s okay.

Because I, and I alone, am the most famous 12 year old in the United States.

And you may be telling me that

‘Marcus, that was absolutely unprecedented.

There was no reason to treat your science teacher in that way’

And I’ll tell you why I did what I did

Some other day

When I’m a bigger man

When I’m 37 and have a wife and a van

Full of crumbs and sloppy little toddlers

But all of that’s okay

You could be waiting longer

For when I’m 121

Slouching on a bus

Because my car had gotten sold

To those less fortunate than us

And I smile

Waiting for another day

As I stumble into my house

As my great-grandkids play

And I think to myself

“Was there reason to be so mean?”

But now I’ve woken up

Was it all just a dream?

Where I was, yes indeed

Famous in the States?

Where everything I’ve wanted

Is served upon a silver plate?

Is that really the life I want?

Really the life I need?

Or should I stay more humble

And not have moods that sting like bees?

/