You can use what researchers have found to be the most effective approaches by following the 5 Cs of Effective Discipline.
Clarity
Be clear in stating rights, rules, and limits.
Children need to know what the rules are, what the discipline will be for breaking a rule, and what that discipline is intended to achieve.
Make this rule unmistakable: use of alcohol, cigarettes, or any other drug by children will not be tolerated.
Be direct and honest in establishing rights, rules, and limits. Never be secretive or try to manipulate. If your child is confused about a rule ("But you smoke..."), answer questions as honestly as you can.
Some families write out rules about homework, TV viewing, curfews, friends, spending money, and responsibilities.
Consistency
Be consistent in rules and discipline or reward, but be flexible, too, to encourage growth.
There are times when an exception can be made to a curfew or some other rule. Whenever possible, make this exception beforehand. This helps develop the child's sense of responsibility.
Avoid adding new disciplines that were not discussed before the rule was broken.
Communication
Talk often about rights, rules, and limits and the reasons for them.
Help your child learn to talk openly and honestly about feelings and needs--including the need for help.
Talk about expanding rights and changing limits as your child grows. This shows respect for children's need to explore, take risks, and become more independent.
Be willing to discuss the fairness of any rule.
Caring
Show affection and love often without being overly protective. Children who have close, affectionate ties with their parents are most likely to obey family rules; this is more important than how strict or permissive you are.
Criticize the action, not the child. Instead of saying, "How could you be so stupid?" say, "Do you know why that was dangerous?"
When rules are broken, act in a calm way and carry out the discipline your child expects.
Show respect for you child's rights, such as the right to privacy.
Create
Create a sense of social responsibility. Give you children regular duties to help them develop self-discipline and a sense of accomplishment.
Hold your children accountable for their actions.
Help your children develop a sense of self-respect so that they thing about how an action will make them feel about themselves.