Talk To Tyra

Welcome to “Talk to Tyra,” your go-to column for thoughtful advice and practical solutions to all of high school’s challenges. Whether you’re struggling with relationship drama, career confusion, or just need a friend to talk to, Tyra is here to help! My goal is to provide Pleasure Ridge Park with compassionate, insightful advice, and to be the big sister you never knew you needed. Don’t be afraid to reach out, as it is my pleasure to advise Pleasure Ridge!

Send any submissions here! 

Anonymous Writer #6 Wrote: 

¨By looking at your column, you always help others feel heard but nobody ever makes you a topic. For my submission I wanted to thank you, on behalf of everyone who has placed a submission, or who were helped by your advice. Thank you for taking the time to help others. You are such a kind person and I hope life treats you well.¨

Dear Anonymous Writer #6: 

For my last response of the year I'd like to take the time to thank you. Thank you, as a student, for taking time to participate in an activity like this. It takes alot to reach out and be vulnerable with a complete stranger. My goal with Talk to Tyra this year was to help deepen PRP's sense of community. I wanted to be able to give students the opportunity to address their problems positively and in turn make this school a more positive place. So thank you, as a reader, for helping to build community within PRP by trying to understand the problems of your peers. And finally thank you for all the kind wishes going forward. It means alot to me. As this new chapter starts in my life, I look forward to learning more about myself and being able to help others do the same as well. As always, thank you for reading.

-Tyra

Anonymous Writer #5 Wrote: 

“Hey, this one is a little long so strap in and good luck!

There is someone that, about a year ago, said incredibly hateful things to me and was ableist (I have a disability) and now I see them almost everywhere I go. People I know like them or are friends with them and it makes me really uncomfortable having to see them or be near them. I reported them 8 months ago for it but no action was taken and I heard nothing back.

What should I do looking forward about this situation. I don't want to ruin my life by coming out against them because so many people I know like them and I fear that nobody will believe me but I feel sick staying silent after they hurt me so badly.

Any advice that can help me out?

Thanks- Student (:”

Dear Anonymous Writer #5: 

The biggest thing is making sure you are fully comfortable in your everyday environment. You seem to think speaking to your friends about your experience will give you peace of mind. If this is the case then, go for it. You shouldn’t have to feel bad about telling your friends about your life. 

That being said though it is completely up to them to decide how they feel about this person. When you speak up, you have to be fully okay with the possibility that nothing changes. Will this possibility hurt you more in the long run? Or will you be okay with distancing yourself from these people and finding a better friend group? Regardless of how you decide to proceed, know that your happiness comes first, and you have the resources to ensure your happiness remains your number one priority. Take care of yourself.

-Tyra

Anonymous Writer #4 Wrote: 

¨I often feel ran over and as if I do not fit in with anyone. I work so hard and I become so ahead in everything that it feels like people only associate with me for answers or guidance. Its hurtful . I have not once been recognized by the school for my hard work and I feel as if that was all for nothing, I would bring this up to my friends but i dont want to be seen as a "pick me" or them feel like i am directing my feeling toward them.¨

Dear Anonymous Writer #4: 

From what I gathered, I feel like your main issue is that you are struggling with feeling unappreciated. This is something that can take a toll on you after a while. I think it’s important to know how you're feeling is not unusual. However, you shouldn’t fester in this feeling. I encourage you to speak to your friends about how you’re feeling. 

I also think that you shouldn't assume your friends are only like you because you're useful. Your friends are your support system, and they love you for who you are. Your friends should be able to lift you up when you’re feeling this way. If you're completely not willing to speak to them, I think it would be best to try to learn to find validation elsewhere, like in your hobbies. I hope this helps you going forward. 

-Tyra

Anonymous Writer #3 Wrote: 

“i really want to talk more to my classmates but im really awkward and i don't know how to start a conversation or keeping one going, i think they are gonna think im weird”

Dear Anonymous Writer #3: 

Thank you for your submission to Talk to Tyra! The first few conversations with a potential friend are the most important. These conversations can lead to long-lasting friendships if you handle them correctly. But what is the correct approach to breaking the ice? My best advice is to put yourself out there. Try to start up conversations with your classmates, most of the time people just need a reason to talk. So if you get the chance, ask them about their hobbies, their taste in music, or maybe just make jokes about things going on in class. Regardless of what the conversation is about, make sure you remain authentic in these conversations. I think it's better to remain yourself because then you know these people like you for who you really are. And remember, conversations don’t have to be long as long as everyone enjoys it. It's okay to want people to like you, but don’t let that thought discourage you from stepping out of your comfort zone. I hope this gets you in the right mindset for talking to your future friends. 

-Tyra

Anonymous Writer #2 Wrote: 

¨Me and my boyfriend have been together for about 8 and a half months and this is the happiest and healthiest relationship I've been in to this day. We've never argued, of course we've disagreed but we've always stayed respectful towards each other. His family treats me as their own, I feel loved and accepted around them. They have been a family to me more than my birth family, and they've done so much for me. When we first started dating, I would get anxious about going to his house where I've gotten extremely nauseous and I would shake. A few months in, that stopped being a problem, but I've noticed recently I've started getting extremely anxious again and I'm not sure why or how I stop it. I love going to his house, I look forward to it all the time, but as soon as I get in the car, my stomach ties itself into knots. Any advice?¨

Dear Anonymous Writer #2: 

Thank you for your submission to Talk to Tyra! Looks like you have a reoccuring anxiety problem. To start, I’d recommend self reflection. Take time to think about every instance where you’ve gotten nauseous or shaky and see if there's any stand out reason why you get uncomfortable. The easier it is for you to understand your anxiety triggers, the easier it is to calm yourself down. That being said, sometimes there is no pinpoint reason for your anxiety to get started. Regardless of the scenario, I have a few things that I can recommend to help ease your symptoms. 

One thing that’s worked for me is deep belly breathing. You have to take deep breaths, but focus on moving your stomach when you inhale, not your chest. This can take a few tries to get right, and It’s easier to do when you're laying down, but once you’ve gotten it down it's a really easy way to self-soothe. Another thing I’d suggest is to do short bursts of exercise before you go to see your boyfriend. It's possible that your anxiety is just the result of being excited to see your boyfriend. Doing burpees, jumping jacks, or even a high energy dance before you leave can help get rid of that adrenaline rush. Hopefully these suggestions will help you to combat these anxiety spells, and if you need anything else, don’t be afraid to Talk to Tyra.

-Tyra

Anonymous Writer #1 Wrote: 

“recently my boyfriend has been talking to me really hateful or shuts me down anytime i bring up any issues i have with him. sometimes he's just hateful in general. it hasn't always been like this, and i don't know what to do. he also followed this instagram model, and when i brought it up said i needed to calm down and that he couldn't care less because she's a skater and he likes to skate. i honestly don't know what to do, and why he has changed so suddenly. im scared he might be cheating or something, and that would explain his sudden change. i have no proof of this, just a bad feeling. please help me!”

Dear Anonymous Writer #1: 

Thank you for your submission to Talk to Tyra! After reading your situation, I feel like the main issue in your relationship is communication. The communication that occurs between you and your boyfriend seems very one sided. My first piece of advice would be to sit him down and explain that you feel like he’s been dismissive of your feelings. If things like who he follows on instagram bothers you, then calmly and kindly explain that to him. Try to come to a solution that works for the both of you guys. If he doesn’t listen to you still, then you have a bigger problem on your hands.

The other thing that sticks out to me is the fact that he seems to belittle you. You said he speaks to you hatefully and shuts you down when you try to address your concerns with him. You do not deserve to be disrespected by anyone, especially not by someone you choose to be in a relationship with. I think the best thing for you to do is take a step back and think about what matters to you most in a relationship. In a situation like this I’d advise you to compare your relationship to the values you’d like in a partner. Sometimes you have to take a person’s actions at face value, and to put it frankly, your boyfriend is exhibiting behaviors of someone who isn’t ready to be in a relationship.

I believe that a healthy relationship is dependent on good communication. If you can get him to communicate with you better than he is now then I can see this relationship flourishing. If not, then you don’t have to force yourself to work with someone who won’t work with you. Remember that you do not have to tolerate disrespect from anyone! Thank you again for writing in and I hope this helps you navigate your situation a bit better. 

-Tyra

Dear MaK (Former Name & Owner)

Dear Anonymous Writers and Readers, 

I’ve decided to flip the script this month. My time as MaK has been the most entertaining and heartwarming experience I have ever had writing for others. I started MaK as a way to directly communicate to you readers. MaK was a hundred and ten percent from your hearts to my keyboard. Every month I waited for submissions and fell in love with every letter and syllable on every page I’d read for you all. With that being said, all things must come to an end. As the end of the year is approaching, I want you to remember to never stop pouring your heart onto the pages. Someone out there needs to hear your voice. Someone out there needs to read your words. I have loved being MaK. I hope you all never stop writing. 

Love always and truly,

Brooklyn Taylor (formerly known as MaK) 

NOTICE: THE BELOW LETTER HAS PERSONAL INFORMATION THAT MAK FEELS UNCOMFORTABLE SHARING, THIS INFORMATION HAS BEEN REDACTED. 

Anonymous Writer #5 Wrote, 

Dear MaK,

So let’s use different names for these people so that you can’t know who they are just in case you know them. So this all happened around July over this past summer, so this girl she added me on snap and yk we asked wyll and all that. She was cute and she thought I was cute too so we started talking. Turns out she’s goes here too, to prp. I thought she looked familiar but I wasn’t too sure. We start talking and she tells me that she’s [REDACTED] and I tell her what I do and she said she might come to one of my events. She never ended up showing but I never thought she would anyways. But once the school year started settling down, we stop talking kinda and the only time I see her is after 5th period walking to 6th. So around early October I start talking to my ex again and she’s not a woman to be trifled with. She found out I started talking to this girl over the summer and she got mad. We only dated for like 3 or 4 months at the end of last year so like march to may. But she got mad and she don’t know that we don’t talk anymore, all she knew was that I said that I would go to her event [REDACTED]. It was like [REDACTED] or something when this happened. Luckily I calmed her down before she texted the first girl. i went to her house and we talked about things and things happend. I knew things weren’t gonna work out between me and my ex so I haven’t talked to her since. I didn’t go to her event on [REDACTED] but that was because I had to do something. [REDATCED] it was my birthday the first girl texted me happy birthday and then we just started talking again. We’ve never told anyone that we were talking because we just didn’t want people knowing and it could cause some problems so we decided to tell nobody that we were talking. So at this point we’re basically dating but she doesn’t wanna make it official yet so that’s a red flag. None of her friends that I know, know that we’re talking and she just keeps telling me that she wants to keep us a secret. I just tried to not mind it but later she [REDACTED] for her thing and while she was gone my ex told me that she might be pregnant and let me be clear there is NO WAY she is. She is a crazy woman and I don’t doubt that she would lie about that. But she got back from [REDACTED] and my ex threatened to tell her that she was pregnant. Which she is not. I just don’t know what to do, I’m kinda at a standstill with her she still tells me that she is pregnant and that she will tell the other girl. She hasn’t done nothing yet but I really like the newer girl but she still won’t tell nobody about us and the other girl is crazy. I just need advice before it gets out of hand. 

Dear Anonymous Writer #5

Hi, before you do anything else, talk to the girl that you’re talking to and tell her everything. This sounds cliche but honesty really is the best policy. I would not show any attention to your ex that is saying she’s pregnant. If you show that girl attention she won’t stop. I also think you should cut communication with your ex completely. If she’s bad news and toxic like you’re explaining, there’s no reason to keep her in your phone. And after everything just reassure the girl you’re talking to, if it gets out before you tell her she will just be more upset. You know the truth so just reassure her. If you feel uncomfortable being a secret to this girl, be honest, if you stay quiet, nothing’s going to be fixed. I hope this helped and good luck!

Love always,

MaK 

Anonymous Writer #4 wrote: 

Dear MaK,

all of my friends have boyfriends or girlfriends, and i’m the single one. i never get jealous of my friends for having happy relationships, but i find myself feeling lonely. they all go on double dates while i sit at home. i like being single, but i want to put myself back out there. i just don’t know if i should wait until college or try to find someone in my grade. or if i should just let whatever happen, happen. what’s your advice?

Dear Anonymous Writer #4, 

If you like being single right now, the best piece of advice I can give to you, which is the worst advice ever, is to keep waiting. The right person will come around at the right time. If you want to put yourself out there, my advice would be to be bold and be yourself. You’re enough with or without a significant other. 

Love always, 

MaK

Hey guys, MaK here. I just wanted to take this month’s issue to tell you guys not to stress too much on Valentine’s Day. There’s an expectation around this day, for singles, it’s to find significant others, for people in relationships, it’s to have this ideal perfect date. I’m here to tell you, don’t stress. For all my singles, don’t stress about not having someone to spend your day with, focus on yourself that day, save your money, and save your time, all you need is yourself. For all my relationships, your significant other is going to love what you plan because they love you. It’s not always about what you do, but why you do it. And you do it because you love them. And they will appreciate that. I love and appreciate all of you. Keep loving. Keep Writing.

Love always, 

MaK 

Hey guys, MaK here. I know this time of year is difficult for us all. As a reset to the year and the new semester, I thought I’d give you guys some recommendations for a fresh start. Here’s five healthy things to do to reset your mental health. 

1. Journaling. 

2. Driving. 

3. Listening to your favortie music.

4. Watch your favorite movie or your favorite show. 

5. Try your best to relax, do something that you like to do, and do it for yourself, not to appease others. 

Anonymous Writer #3 Wrote: 

There’s a guy I like I want to get to know him but he’s semi popular and doesn’t seem like someone to mingle for fun. He’s intimidating to me but he’s so pretty and I want to get to know him more but I’m scared to talk to him with him knowing it’s me, what advice could you give me?

Dear Anonymous Writer #3,

I’m just going to jump right in. My advice to you is be lowkey first. Try to become friends, get to know him, let him get to know you too, if you’re in the same class maybe sit by him or ask him for work. If you feel like it could go somewhere or y’all are connecting then take a leap, the worst that he can say is no which might suck for a little bit but you’ll be okay, and at least you’ll know. Or he could end up liking you back and it could be great for you. My best advice to you though is this, if he seems not interested, don’t keep fighting for it, it just hurts you in the long run, take it from someone who definitely knows.

Love always and truly,

MaK

Anonymous Writer #2 wrote: 

There's a girl i used to be close friends with, and we stopped being friends in april or so because her boyfriend wanted her to stop being friends with guys. i cant let go of her because of past trauma (not able to really get over people normally), ive been thinking of ways to contact her because i see her alot in the halls but idk what to do. what do you suggest??

Dear Anonymous Writer #2, 

Thanks for taking the time to chat. I feel for you, I just wanted to get that out first. I know that when someone ends a friendship with you and it’s not your fault it hurts. I can tell you that from personal experience. You could contact her. Tell her how bad her decision hurt you and how you feel. Communication is usually the best answer to any problem. If nothing changes after that, just give her some space. Even if it was because of her boyfriend, she ultimately made the choice to stop talking to you. You don’t have to get over it or her right now. Grieving is a process, no matter the kind of grief you’re going through. However, you can’t keep dwelling on the past. And maybe, she’ll realize the errors of her ways and come back on her own accord, but if you do contact her and she doesn’t respond the way you want her to or at all then my advice to you is try to move on. It’s going to hurt. Probably for a while. But it’s only going to hurt you more if you keep trying to fight a losing battle. I know that I don’t know who you are but I do know that you’re enough. You deserve friends that believe that too. Cutting you off because her boyfriend doesn’t like her having guy friends doesn’t seem like she sees your worth. I hope you do. 

Love always and truly,

MaK 

Anonymous Writer #1 wrote:

Dear MaK, I wasn't ready for this year. After being told to forget the last seven months I haven't felt the same, I feel like a burden, I try to hide behind sarcasm and bad jokes that always miss. Sometimes I feel like I'm not wanted around by others. I feel alone all the time especially at home, I never had a lot of family, really I only have my mother so I have trouble trying to open up and talk what's on my mind and tell people when I have a problem. My social capabilities are not good and never were good. I guess I wish I had family or a better understanding of how people work.

Dear Anonymous Writer #1,

I would like to begin by thanking you for talking to me. Thanks! Secondly, I understand feeling like a burden, an obligation. The feeling of not knowing whether or not you’re wanted around. However, you are not alone. I myself, as a high school teenager, as I’m sure many other teenagers, understand how it is to feel like you’re socially inadequate or not good enough. I won’t pretend to know the details of your life over the last seven months; but you don’t have to forget about it or get over it. Healing takes time and it looks different for everyone. You are not a burden. You are good enough just as you are. There are many adults in the building that do care about you. You can always talk to your school counselor or Mrs. Cotton. And you can always keep talking to MaK! I know it’s a scary place to be. But there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. Keep fighting. 

Love always and truly, 

MaK

Wanna Chat with MaK? Follow the link below.

Write a letter to MaK