May 2026 

Volume 4, Issue 7

5 IDEAS TO PRUNE YOUR PROM– QUICK! BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE!!!

By Mr. Dr. David Bartholomew Adolphus College “Running Out of Material” Cornsweat Jr.

This year’s prom theme is masquerade. Eh. It was probably my favorite out of the different choices out of the options… in my head. In practice the theme feels rather disjointed. While mentally I was thinking of the ballroom sequence from Labyrinth, in practice, people are going to do whatever. Thankfully, your goat, me, is here to provide better alternative options to save prom!!

1. Where’s Waldo (Promaldo? Waldprom??) Prom. Everyone dresses up in stripes, blue jeans, etc., except for one missing piece. One person, however, will have all the aspects of Waldo. This person will be assigned the title of the real Waldo. If the real Waldo gets found out during the duration of prom, they must remain in Norway Hall until next year’s prom (don’t worry, there’s concessions). 

2. Norway Hall Prom. When I say Norway Hall Prom, I mean putting the ‘Norway’ in Norway Hall. I’m talking about the whole works. Snow, snow, more snow, vikings or something, and an evil twist involving Nigeria. If you failed the citizenship test at the door you can’t enter. Walk back home in the 40 degree weather, fool. 

3. Facebook prom. You play candy crush instead of dancing. You fall for AI disinformation instead of taking photos with your friends. You vote for your favorite Minion meme instead of prom royalty. The only songs on rotation are Don’t Stop Believing and Livin’ On a Prayer. If you complain, Mark Zuckerberg. 

MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS MONTH

By Liv Braaten

Mental health is a growing global issue, with around one in seven people worldwide living with mental disorders, the most common including anxiety and depression disorders. Since 1949, the month of May has been classified as Mental Health Awareness Month in the United States. Symbolized by a green ribbon, it was created to provide education, fight stigma, support those struggling with mental illnesses and advocate for better, more accessible care. Mental Health Month is primarily run by organizations including NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness), SAMHSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration) and Mental Health America. Stigmas play a huge part in this issue, making life even harder for people living with mental health issues. Stigmas involve judgmental and negative attitudes and actions towards those with mental health issues, often stemming from a lack of understanding and knowledge, partially due to widespread media portrayals of those living with mental illnesses. This can even lead to internalized stigma, leading to lowered self esteem and self worth, which can worsen many mental health issues. One of the best ways to combat stigma is to join open discussions on mental health and to educate people on mental health issues. There are many mental health groups in Duluth, including classes and support groups, many run by NAMI.

THE GE

By Zenon Iwen

The dagger-axe, called ‘ge’ in Chinese, is my favorite weapon right now. The weapon is basically a pole with a dagger shaped spike on the top pointing out. The ge has many types like the Ji (Chinese halburd). I have an addiction with these fun little pole arms, but lets get back to ge. The ge is one of the most ubiquitous metal weapons used by people in ancient China during the Bronze Age and early Iron Age. I don't really know much about the Bronze Age. I mean I don't know much about most of the ages but the Bronze Age is different. The ge consists of a dagger shaped blade with its tang set at right angles onto a perpendicular wooden shaft. Slap a dagger on the side of a long stick and call it a weapon. The ge is versatile on the battlefield and could be used as a hooking, slashing or sweeping weapon to strike the enemy, depending on the direction of the wielding. Imagine being in the army and a man with a big dagger stick slices you apart. The ge became the predominant weapon of infantry during the Shang and Zhou dynasties. If you don't know all about China, the Shang dynasty was 1600-1046 BC, Zhou was 1046-256 BC. The ge was sometimes used by the strikers of charioteer crews. Next time you see someone with ge think twice before you fight them with your family's comfort meat cleaver. 

I miss you soy sauce.

MAY DAYS

By Liv Braaten

Almost every day in a month is a random national holiday. These days, called “national days”, are different from federal holidays (Thanksgiving, Veterans Day, etc.) because they do not have to be voted on by congress. Instead, national days are simply submitted by an individual, an organization or a company by filling out an application. National days are often created as marketing strategies for the companies that submit them, although others are days of action, days of awareness, or just for fun. Since anyone can submit a day, most are very strange (National Walk Around Things Day, April 4th).

Some days are a specific weekday each year (such as the first Wednesday of every October), so their dates are not always the same. There are currently over 1500 national days, weeks and months, and May is no exception. Some ridiculous May national days include:

May 3: National Lumpy Rug Day

May 7: National Roast Leg of Lamb Day

May 9: National Lost Sock Memorial Day

May 13: National Crouton Day

May 14: National Dance Like a Chicken Day

May 20: National Be a Millionaire Day

May 27: National Cellophane Tape Day

May 30: National Hole in my Bucket Day

MY TOP 10 SONGS BY THE STROKES

By SuperStroker

10. On The Other Side

It’s hard to say why exactly I like this song enough to be in my top 10. It’s probably the fun and repetitive baseline, as the lyrics (which are about being a jerk to everyone and hating yourself for it) kind of bum me out. It’s not a song to listen to when you’re in a good mood but it’s a good song regardless.

9. Selfless

Everything about this song is beautiful. The lyrics, being about loving someone but having to wait for them, feel intimate, and the main riff, chord progression and solo just compliment the lyrics so well. This probably should be higher on the list, but like number 10 you have to be in a certain mood to really enjoy this song.

8. 12:51

Not much to say about this one, other than the fact that it’s fun to listen to. The riff and chorus are catchy, the lyrics are fun, the song itself is the perfect length without being too short or too long, and that’s about it. 

7. The Modern Age

Again, not too much to say about this song, but I feel that Julian puts a lot more effort into singing than the aforementioned songs (besides Selfless). The solo slaps, too.

6. Between Love And Hate

The chorus and the solo are definitely the best part of this song. I can’t really tell if the lyrics are about breaking up with someone that wasn’t a good partner or if it’s another song about being a jerk, but whatever they mean the song is still good.

5. Under Cover Of Darkness

I’m not the biggest fan of Angles, but this song is without a doubt the best song on that album. It’s very upbeat, making it very hard not to sing along whenever it comes on. The opening riff uses two guitars playing out of key with each other which makes the song unique. 

4. Ize Of The World

This song is a bit more serious than the other songs mentioned before, as it criticizes pretty much every aspect of modern life (I won’t get into all of that here, so you’ll have to listen to the song to know what I mean). The rhyming of different words ending with “-ize” sounds nice.

3. What Ever Happened?

There’s nothing to be said here that I haven’t already said before. Fast paced, super catchy, perfect length, fun to sing, all combine to make this song one of their best. Also Julian’s voice sounds really good in this one.

2. Brooklyn Bridge To Chorus

This song is unique, as it uses a synth piano as the main riff instead of a guitar. I may be biased here, as this song ‘helped’ me through a tough time in my life and the lyrics felt very personal and comforting in a way as corny as that sounds. I highly recommend this song.

1. You Only Live Once

The best Strokes song of all time. I can’t really put my finger on why I love this song so much without being repetitive, but it does everything so well. It just seems like there was a lot of effort put into this song. Not only that but its demo version is also great. 9/10 song, PLEASE listen to it.

SUMMER IS AMONG US

Doubletooth Grizzly

Winter is over, spring is developing. As I have said in past articles, I believe there isn’t really a spring here in Duluth MN. So really we go from a winter, to a soggy winter, to summer. We are entering the age of warm summer days where you can walk outside without shivering or getting your new sneakers all full of mud or slush. I have long awaited this season of joy and freedom! A time when you don't have to worry about being on top of assignments you don’t care about. An era of emancipation. I may sound dramatic in the eyes of older adults. But every teenager or young adult would agree with me. Summer is also a major period of transformation. When we have time to work on ourselves and our own interests. The school year is coming to a close. Soon you may be beaching every other day. Hiking through the local trails. Biking through the local trails. Spending time with friends and family. Going on road trips. Working a summer job. Or exploring your options as you start a new chapter in adulthood. Make sure to enjoy this summer and make it your best one yet! Especially for the seniors out there! 

JUMPING SPIDERS: BEST SPIDER OF ALL TIME?

By Not by a spider

We all know spiders, right? Small, hairy, too many eyes and legs. Are they helpful? Absolutely. Are they gross to look at? Also yes. Most spiders are ugly and gross, so much so that some people develop crippling fear towards them. But what if I told you there was a type of spider that wasn’t ugly or gross, and is even cute? If you’re still lost, look back at the title. I’m talking about jumping spiders.

What makes these spiders so much better than the rest? First, of all, they are adorable. They’re small and fuzzy, and although they have 8 eyes, only 4 are actually visible to us, and they are full of life as opposed to regular spider’s gross beady little doll eyes. Little known fact: They are really good at jumping, although ‘pouncing’ would be a more accurate way of describing it. They even make a little web safety line in case they miss the jump, which isn’t often but it’s still cool. They have goofy little front limbs they use to hold down prey, and it makes them look even cuter. They also make really easy pets, as they take up little space, can form bonds with their owner, are fairly low maintenance and are easy to find. I’m not endorsing stealing animals from the wild and shoving them into a container for the rest of their lives, however, from what I’ve read and the videos I’ve watched about jumping spiders, it is not frowned upon to take in a wild jumping spider. Just do research and take proper care of it.

LOOK AT THIS GREATSWORD STUFF!

By Zenon

If you don't know what a great sword is or want some more info about it, here's what a Greatsword is. A great sword is a two-handed sword designed to be wielded with both hands. It is too large to be worn on a belt, with its grip and crossguard being very long in proportion to its blade. In the book Use of Medieval Weaponry, historical fencing instructor Eric Lower describes greatswords as being approximately the height of a man or at least reaching the height of one’s chin. Greatswords are large swords but they have to be lighter than they seem. If they were that heavy they would be the worst weapon known to mankind, other than the

Apache pistol (look it up). Back on track, the average weight ranges from 5 to 8 pounds. The length of the hilt and crossguard was crucial for balancing their weight. Historian William J. McPeak, in his discussion of two-handed swords, noted that hilts needed to be at least 9 inches long to counterbalance blades that could measure up to 45 inches or more. 

CHICKEN & BROCCOLI

Ingredients 

3 garlic cloves, finely chopped

1/2 cup low-sodium chicken broth

1/3 cup reduced-sodium soy sauce

3 Tbsp. honey

2 Tbsp. cornstarch

1 Tbsp. finely grated peeled ginger

2 tsp. toasted sesame oil

1 Tbsp. neutral oil

1 lb. boneless, skinless chicken thighs or breasts, cut into 1/2" pieces 

2 medium heads of broccoli, cut into bite-sized florets

Directions

Step 1

In a small bowl, whisk garlic, broth, soy sauce, honey, cornstarch, ginger, and sesame oil until cornstarch is dissolved.

Step 2

In a large skillet or wok over high heat, heat neutral oil. Cook chicken, undisturbed, until it easily releases from the pan, 1 to 2 minutes. Stir and continue to cook, stirring occasionally, until golden brown on all sides and just cooked through, about 5 minutes more. Transfer to a plate.

Step 3

In the same skillet over medium-low heat, toss broccoli and garlic mixture. Cover skillet and let broccoli steam until crisp-tender, 2 to 3 minutes. 

Step 4

Uncover and return chicken and any accumulated juices to the skillet. Cook, stirring, until sauce is thickened and chicken and broccoli are well coated, 1 to 2 minutes more.

Step 5

Divide rice among plates or bowls. Spoon stir-fry over. Top with sesame seeds.

DEALING WITH SENIORITIS

By Sonam Choetso

As graduation gets closer, many seniors find it harder to stay focused in class. Assignments feel less important, motivation drops, and the countdown to the last day becomes the main priority. This feeling, often called “senioritis,” is common and usually shows up after college decisions are made or when burnout from the school year sets in.

While it might seem harmless, senioritis can have real consequences. Grades can slip, which may impact final transcripts, and in some cases, colleges can even reconsider admissions offers. Teachers also notice a drop in effort, which can affect participation and overall performance.

Some students say setting small, short-term goals helps them stay on track. Breaking assignments into manageable pieces or sticking to a routine can make school feel less overwhelming. Others try to remind themselves that they’ve come this far and should finish strong.

STOP THE KILLING OF TIMBER RATTLESNAKES (AND THE DOWNPLAYING OF THEIR DEATHS)

By Ace Bowen

Crotalus horridus - more commonly known as the timber rattlesnake - is a species of venomous pit viper that can be found across the eastern United States. They have a pattern on their back of dark brown to black crossbands with a grayish to yellow-brown background. These crossbands zig-zag and have irregularly shaped edges with a rust colored stripe along the vertebrae. Like most snakes in the US, they are feared by many and often killed, sometimes without reasonable threat of an attack. Timber rattlesnakes have the second-most venomous bite of any snake found in the northern US, but are much more docile than other rattlesnakes and usually either slither away or lay still on their backs when threatened. Regardless, a large amount of snake deaths are caused by early preventative measures rather than validly protective ones, which is often unnecessary. Countless animals are threatened nationwide by habitat destruction, pollution, and other human-caused climate change. Reptiles and amphibians are especially threatened by this, and snakes have been even more specifically targeted throughout history by human killings. If you keep your distance from a snake and don’t make any swift or aggressive movements, you will most likely be safe from an attack. If the snake is trying to enter your home and you need to remove it, contact a professional if you have any reason to believe it’s venomous. Having knowledge of venomous and nonvenomous snakes will make situations like this easier to deal with, but either way, immediately killing the snake is usually the wrong thing to do.

Timber rattlesnakes are currently found in 30 states, 6 of which they are barely found along the border of. They were once found in the Niagara and Quebec regions of Canada, but have been listed as extirpated (or eradicated from a region) since 2001, making them endemic to the US. They were once found in Maine, Michigan, Delaware, and Rhode Island, but have been extirpated from there as well. Of the 24 states with prominent populations, 12 of them list timber rattlesnakes as either threatened or endangered, a number that has been growing steadily as human developments and interactions continue to kill them. Despite this, they are somehow listed as a species of least concern and are not considered endangered on a wide scale. More than half of the states they’ve been found in over the last 250 years have either killed them off entirely or listed them as threatened or endangered, yet they’re a species of “least concern.” On a nationwide scale, they’re acknowledged as having a high population with little to worry about. However, on individual state levels, this is largely not true. For example, the New Jersey Department of Environmental Protection lists them as being “among the most endangered species in the state,” speaking broadly about animal species as a whole.

Helping timber rattlesnakes can be as simple as not killing them. Being safe around them as well as reporting sightings of them in states where they’re threatened or endangered is plenty for someone to do at a citizen level. Unfortunately, some of the biggest threats to snakes are out of the public’s hands. Any number of projects that destroy the deciduous forests they live in threaten their ability to exist, and their propensity to visit rural areas puts them in danger of fearful humans. Ophydiomycosis, a fungal disease that affects snakes, also ravages their populations. All these factors combine to put timber rattlesnakes in serious danger despite what their listings on endangerment sites may claim. If you see these animals, please do not hurt them and report them if you see them in an endangered area. The Minnesota DNR website has resources on their “requests for sightings” page if you happen to be in the southeastern part of the state, and other states have their own resources as well. Most importantly, stay safe around them. If you stay safe and don’t interfere with the snakes, you probably won’t be putting them in harm’s way either.

PROTECTING YOU

Vynn Ghergich

I am not a bad dog, I don't know why I bite

But my teeth are sharp from grinding together

The points dig into my gums.

And as I hold my tongue, keep the acid words deep down

The pain slowly thrums

And the blood slowly drip drip drips

Onto my tongue and around my tether.

I tied that knot many years ago

The twine against my muzzle

An action born of kindness 

That is now hurt hurt hurting

But now the copper taste is filling up

And the twine was ripped off in the middle of a tussle

So the blood comes out down down down into the dirt

And they stare at me 

They say I’m overreacting

I know I’m not.

All this blood is me

Trying to keep the nicety 

All of this violence was once peace

I’m not a bad dog, But I know why I bite

THE SEASONS THAT MADE ME
By Aaliyah Kennebeck

My heart has always moved through changed seasons. But not all the changes come quietly, sometimes it grows slowly. Only with time will it rebuild itself into who I am, and who I will become. Some appear unannounced through force, but it’s there to create my own independence, my own individuality. Although, I never noticed when it started, and how my feelings began changing like the seasons outside my window.

Winter was the very first season I learned what it was like to be truly alone. Where everything felt quiet, maybe even too quiet. Before it was the kind of quiet that presses against your chest. As all the trees were bare, the sky stayed gray, and the sun disappeared before I was ready for the day to end. I used to think darkness meant something was wrong. Like the world had forgotten how to shine. But as the days passed, I noticed winter has a strange way of teaching you things. I eventually came to understand the ways it showed me how to sit with my own thoughts without feeling completely heavy hearted. Only then did I see how to walk without someone beside me. And how to listen to the sound of my own footsteps falling onto the softened snow, just to realize I was more than the thoughts that consumed me. For a long time I thought I was lost in that season. But somewhere beneath the frozen ground, something inside me was still alive. Yet spring didn’t arrive all at once. It never does. It came slowly;  in small pieces of warmth, through the soft mornings where the air didn’t feel so heavy anymore. And for the first time, the light wasn’t something I had to wait for someone else to bring. It was already something growing quietly inside of me the whole time. When summer arrived, I felt different. Not perfect. Not healed completely. Just… stronger. Like the sun had finally reached the parts of me that had been hiding in the cold. But through autumn I noticed when the air gets sharp and the leaves begin to fall, I don’t fear the darker seasons anymore. Because I know something I didn’t know before. Even in the coldest winters, even in the longest nights, there is always light learning how to find its way back to me. 

THE DEVELOPMENT OF TALKING TOM

By Zenon

Development for the original Talking Tom app began in October 2009 after Slovenian high school sweethearts Samo and Iza Login studied to get into the business of apps. The two had saved $250,000 from working for local IT companies, and the Logins, who legally changed their surname to match their career, set up an office in Ljubljana alongside six of their friends. Their first few attempts to get into the mobile market were unsuccessful: a soccer app, a travel guide to Iceland, and a”wealth affirmation” tool that shared financial mantras.

After some more unsuccessful attempts, Samo Login, who was not interested in making games due to competition, came up with the idea to create an app based  around a character Samo Login purchased a $90 feral cat model named cat cartoon off the 3D model website TurboSquid, created and uploaded by 3D artist Andrey Kravchenko on January 31, 2004.

I think the modal is really disturbing and is a sick imitation of a cartoon cat but hey thats just me.

Samo personally renamed the model “Talking Tom”, and handed the model, as well as that for the alleyway background named “Alley Corner with Graffiti”, to his developers, who coded the animations and talkback feature, creating the app. Both were eventually removed in 2016, being replaced with the original assets matching newer entries in the franchise.

WHERE THE LIGHT RETURNS
By Aaliyah Kennebeck

Somewhere inside you, there is a quiet place that pain could never fully reach. Even on the nights when your chest felt like it was collapsing, when the world looked gray and hope felt like a word meant for someone else; that place still existed. Healing begins there. Not with a miracle, not with everything suddenly okay, but with the smallest shift, a breath that doesn’t hurt as much, a moment where the silence feels gentle instead of empty. Healing is strange like that. It grows slowly, like wildflowers pushing through cracked pavement. No one tells them to bloom. They just do. You begin to notice how the sun warms your skin again, how music reaches places in your heart that once felt numb. And though the past still lives in your bones, it no longer controls the rhythm of your steps. The scars remain, but they soften. They become stories, instead of wounds. Healing teaches you that strength isn’t loud. It isn’t pretending everything is perfect. Strength is waking up again after the hardest nights. Strength is choosing to stay when leaving would feel easier. Strength is believing, even if only a tiny part of you does, that life can still hold beautiful things. And slowly, day by day, the darkness loosens its grip. Light begins to spill into the corners you thought would stay shadowed forever. Until one quiet morning you realize something incredible: You are still here. Your heart is still beating. And that, in itself, is the beginning of everything.

CHARACTER IDEAS FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION

By Josey Johnston

If you’re anything like me, you’ve had artblock for half a year and one of your parents spent three hundred bucks on a drawing tablet that you feel awful about hardly using. Luckily for you, I have some ideas for you to think about instead of actively creating! Maybe this’ll be able to pull you out of procrastination, but if not, don’t sweat it. Pushing yourself will only turn your hobby into a chore.

Recycle old characters

In the distant, ancient times of pre-Covid life, I’d be one of those kids that’d try to one-up themselves with dramatic backstories. Stuff like a half-demon cat that had their whole family killed by their evil side. There isn’t anything wrong with having characters like that, but if that’s all the substance there is to them, they’ll get a bit boring. Tragedies aren’t very tragic if there’s no upside to accompany them. If you have characters you’ve abandoned due to their half-baked nature, try to salvage them! Redesign them! Expand their lore!! Give them someone they have a complicated relationship with!!! Give them a reason to keep going, so if they lose the purpose, it actually means something. If you had an imaginary friend, maybe bring them back too!

LET YOUR HATERED FUEL YOU

With all the media people consume on a regular basis, there’s probably something you’ve seen and absolutely despised. Something you can confidently say you’d do better than the creators. It can be as small as a minor detail in a character’s design to the entire plot of a story being laughably hard to follow. Take those dumpsterfires and run. Find a way to make it your own, and make it better. Combine some of that gross stuff! Make a compost bin!! Take that advice both literally and figuratively!!!

Use others as a template

If you want a fleshed-out character that feels alive, work from someone who already is. Don’t know who? Look in a mirror! Use the experiences that made you who you are today and mold them to fit your character. Remix the people you look up to and ask them for their input. Work from your outside perspective. Mix and match the traits of your friends. Don’t use their bad memories without their permission, though! Also adjust everything a respectable amount!! You probably wouldn’t want to see your incredibly personal trauma get copy-pasted to someone else’s whimsical critter for nothing but angsty doodles!!! Don’t be a metaphorical mosquito!!!! Respect your pals!!!!!

Embrace the mundane

If you’re able to make a character without dumping a truckload of misery on them, you’re either lying or a figment of everyone’s imagination. Make a character that lived a pretty ordinary life. Give them a job at a gas station. Let them take care of their neighbors’ dogs while the owners are away. They can have bad experiences, but you don’t have to make it as bad as watching their friend die. Something intense and stressful can be interesting, but something more grounded brings a different kind of empathy because you could probably relate a bit. Instead of a dead friend, they could just live far away and be bad at reaching out. Instead of making the chosen one that’s destined to save the world, make a guy that really likes a band and collects selfies with the members.

Play telephone with yourself

Make a character, then redesign them to fit something else. Draw a hybrid of your pets. Turn that creature into a dragon species. Turn that dragon into a person. Make that person fit into the world of a series you like. Maybe get a friend and take turns redesigning them! Keep going until you end up with someone completely new!! Go crazy!!!

That’s all I got. Hopefully this gave you a couple ideas! Remember to let yourself be cringy!! You can be stupid if you enjoy it!!!

AIRSOFT

Doubletooth Grizzly

Recently I have gotten into a new hobby: Airsoft! I have only played a few times but it is loads of fun, if you like running through the woods shooting fake pistols at each other, of course. The basic rules are don’t shoot at the face, wear goggles or glasses, and call your hits. So if you get hit, be a good sport and be honest. No one likes a cheater. You can play in teams or free for all. The best place to play this game is in the woods, and not in town. It is illegal to fire airsoft guns within city limits And you should never brandish them in public as it is also illegal. Make sure the airsoft gun always has an orange tip so it is not mistaken for a real firearm. You should also always make sure to keep them in a bag or case when transporting them. Airsoft can be dangerous too, you should always handle them with safety and regard for the people around you. I think the reason this game is so fun is because it’s basically like nerf but for adults! Everyone knows what nerf is. It is a part of many people's childhoods. At some point nerf got boring and anti-climactic! Airsoft is for the same people. People that enjoy the thrilling and adrenaline inducing experience of makebelief due or die adventures. Just older. In my mind, airsoft is for adults who want to experience that same enjoyment that nerf brought them. If you want to get into airsoft go to Fleet Farm or Bass Pro Shop where they have all the equipment you should need. The nice thing is it doesn’t have to be an expensive hobby either. There is a range of prices for gear. And ammo is very affordable. The only thing that could be expensive is the airsoft gun itself. If you are interested in this hobby, just make sure you are careful and play on private property outside of city limits. Or an airsoft park. Have fun out there! 

THE QUIET WAY BACK

By Aaliyah Kennebeck

Healing does not arrive loudly. It doesn’t knock on your door or announce itself like a victory parade. It comes softly— like morning light slipping through the blinds after a long, sleepless night. At first, you barely notice it. It’s in the moment, you laugh a little longer than you expected. In the breath you take, when the weight on your chest finally loosens its grip. Healing is not forgetting. It is remembering without the sharp edges cutting you open again. It is learning that the cracks inside your heart are not proof that you are broken— but proof that you survived the storm. Some days it feels like progress: clear skies, steady steps, hope blooming quietly in your ribs. Other days it feels like falling backward, like the wounds have opened again. But even then, something inside you is still stitching itself together in the dark. Healing is patience. It is allowing yourself to rest, when the world tells you to run. It is forgiving yourself for the days you could only crawl. And slowly;  without you even realizing, the colors return. Music sounds fuller. The air feels softer. Your reflection begins to look like someone you recognize again. One day you will wake up and the pain will no longer be the loudest voice in the room. And you will realize that healing was never about becoming who you used to be. It was about growing into someone even stronger than before.

ETA AQUARIDS METEOR SHOWER

By Liv Braaten

The Eta Aquarids meteor shower usually peaks in early May, although it is active from late April to late May. This year, it peaks on May 5th-6th this year between 2:00am and dawn. At its peak, 40-50 meteors per hour can be visible. The meteors are debris from Halley’s Comet and appear to originate from the constellation Aquarius, specifically the star Eta Aquarii (where the meteor shower gets its name). They are known for their speed, traveling around 40.7 miles per second. While viewing is best in the Southern Hemisphere or near the equator, they can be viewed in Minnesota, with roughly 15-20 meteors visible in the pre-dawn hours. In the Northern Hemisphere, they often appear as “earthgrazers” or exceptionally bright meteors that skim Earth’s upper atmosphere before exiting back into space. They leave colorful trails that can last several minutes. Meteor showers are best viewed in more rural locations, farther from city lights, which can obstruct visibility of the night sky. Meteors are most easily viewed when you avoid looking at white light for around 20 to 30 minutes to allow your eyes to adjust to the darkness. Red light should be used if you need to see, since it does not affect night adaptation as much.

GARLIC-Y ALFREDO

1 cup (or more) heavy cream

2 cups (or more) low-sodium vegetable broth, divided

2 oz. Pecorino Romano or Parmigiano Reggiano, finely grated (about 1 cup), plus rind (optional)

1 Tbsp. white miso paste

1/2 cup extra-virgin olive oil 

8 cloves garlic, thinly sliced 

8 oz. ditalini 

1 tsp. smoked paprika 

1 Tbsp. unsalted butter

2 tsp. thinly sliced chives

Step 1

In a medium, high-sided skillet over medium heat, heat oil. Cook garlic, stirring occasionally, until beginning to turn golden, 3 to 4 minutes; don’t leave them unattended since they will brown very quickly. Using a slotted spoon, transfer garlic to a paper towel-lined plate. Carefully pour out half of the oil and discard.

Step 2

Sprinkle ditalini into the pan. Add paprika and cook, stirring occasionally, until pasta is toasty and very lightly blistered, 1 to 2 minutes.

Step 3

Add cream, 1½ cups broth, and cheese rind (if using). Cook, stirring consistently to avoid sticking and reducing heat to medium-low if it’s rapidly boiling, until liquid begins to thicken, 8 to 10 minutes. Add miso and ½ cup broth and continue to cook, stirring often, until very creamy and thickened, 6 to 8 minutes more. 

Step 4

Remove from heat. Stir in Pecorino and butter until melted. If the sauce seems too thick, add a little more broth or cream. Discard the cheese rind. Sprinkle with fried garlic and chives.

Aries (March 21-April 19)

Careful when drinking ketchup. It may be from… the creature…

Taurus (April 20-May 20)      

Be careful what you wish for, Taurus. Fifty bunnies weigh an awful lot.

Gemini (May 21-June 20)

Check under your pillow, for the reverse teeth fairy may have a gift. Or it’s Franco Barbi…

Cancer (June 21-July 22)

Were you born on July 4th? Cuz daang. You uh. You’re. Gonna be 250, aahaha…

Leo (July 23-August 22)

I would like to formally apologize to the puffin community for my previous draft of your horoscope. #notmyfault #sorryyyyyy #idsayilldobetterbutthatwouldbealie #icelandisoverparty

Virgo (August 23-September 22)

Walks away with a suspiciously horoscope shaped throat. 

Libra (September 23-October 22)

I know what you did.

  Scorpio (October 23-November 21)

Pencil sharpeners get soooo hungryyyy now that people have switched to mechanical pencils. Feed them and make them big and strong pretty please. Be the mama they never had.

Sagittarius (November 22-December 21)

The moment you stop reading this, I die. I am in these words, stuck between the fibers of the papers. Each letter is a segment of my soul, and if you get to the end of the sentence, if I leave your train of thought, that’s it. I’m done. X_X 

Capricorn (December 22-January 19)

Come here often?

Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)

YOU NEED TO GO INTO THE OCEAN. YOU NEED THE SEA. YOU NEED TO GO!! YOU NEED IT.

Pisces (February 19 - March 20) 

You’re trying to replace yourself, you’re trying to replace yourself.