Dating & Domestic Violence

Domestic Abuse is something which can affect confidence and self esteem, lead to feelings of despair, depression, anxiety, entrapment, and in some situations can lead to feelings of being controlled, isolated from family and friends, constantly watched, and can also lead to lives being taken.

When we think about Domestic Abuse we often automatically think of abuse between partners but it is important also for us all to recognise that abuse could be between siblings, children abusing their parents and parents abusing their children and abuse by professional workers such as carers, support workers who are looking after vulnerable people.

Nobody should have to put up with abuse whoever it is from and in whatever setting. Each individual has a right to feel safe from harm whether that be physical, emotional, sexual, neglect.

This Section Includes Information Relating to:

• Children and young people witnessing domestic violence

• If you think a child is being abused

• Male victims of domestic violence

• Perpetrators of domestic violence

For children and young people witnessing domestic violence in the home

If you are a child or young person witnessing domestic violence in the home you may be feeling very alone, frightened, depressed, confused, isolated. Your school work may be suffering, you may be experiencing difficulties in making friends and relationships, you may be harming yourself in some way as a means of coping with the circumstances at home.

It is important to talk to someone about how you are feeling. SupportLine is a confidential telephone helpline which will enable you to talk to a helpline worker about what is going on for you. You will be listened to and believed. You can do this in complete confidence and anonymously and no action will be taken unless you want it to be taken. You will be in control of what happens unless the helpline worker feels your life is in danger and then will let you know what action they will take for your safety. There are also other helplines you can ring such as Childline which is a free 24hour helpline for children and young people. There may be someone in your family circle who you could talk to - an aunt, uncle, grandparent etc., or a school teacher or youth worker. It is important to get some support for yourself.

You may feel in some way responsible for the violence which is taking place - remember IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT! YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE.

You may feel guilty you cannot protect the parent who is being subjected to violence. IT IS NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY TO PROTECT YOUR PARENT.

You may feel you are being disloyal to the parent who is being violent by speaking about what is happening within the home to other people. A PARENT WHO IS VIOLENT NEEDS HELP JUST AS THE PARENT WHO IS BEING SUBJECTED TO VIOLENCE NEEDS HELP.

These are all natural feelings to have and feelings which you can talk through with someone who understands what you are going through.

DON'T TRY TO COPE ON YOUR OWN - TRY TO GET AS MUCH HELP AND SUPPORT FOR YOURSELF AS YOU CAN.

Supportline