The Cringiest of Words is Cringe

A group of silly little Shallot members have come to the Earth-squelching conclusion: the word cringe is cringe, and even the cringiest word. The Shallot has collectively decided cringe is “a highkey lucious word” (description courtesy of Mr. Somerville). Many have begun to believe the word cringe should go down in history as the most flavorsome, illest, wince-worthy, janky, shizzle, yeet-like, bae, bougie, goblin-mode, uwu-esque, moist and even a finna drippy word ever, no cap. It makes everyone who hears this word secrete into their shells like goofy little turtles. It makes the Shallot collectively LOL when they hear how absolutely annoyed bruhs are by this baller word, but to that we say “welp”.

Due to this conclusion, many of our East Middle School staff have stumbled upon this cutesy little word. Mr. Thomas has grown very fond of this word, and he even has decided to make this a school rule. Mr. Thomas made a beautifully articulated speech about his true passion for this word, “Words are important to the lively-hood of our wonderful school. As a school, we need to put more value into this beautiful word. This word makes me have hope that we will exceed exceptionally in CMAS in the literature, I’m even considering sending a letter to the state of Colorado to get the test name changed to Cringe Measures of Success. Our school deserves to cringe as much as I truly do. I have decided that all teachers are required to pepper in the following words: cringe, cringiest, cringy, and all variations of cringe. Teachers that do not follow this rule will be forced to spend an hour having a ‘cringe fest’ and I will dab on all da haters. I appreciate you for not cringing at what I said.” Many were shocked by Mr. Thomas’s dedication to this kooky word, but apparently he is just more hip than we thought he was. At least now the Shallot can say that East Middle School is just a little nutty, but still pretty swaggy cuz.