Without thinking, I ran out the backdoor; far, far away from the theater. As far as I could go. My hands shakes as I stare at nothing in particular with horror. That was my fault. I killed someone. I killed him. I look up at the sky, the sun was just starting to rise. Soon everyone would wake up and see my crime. They would all see the horror I committed. But they would understand right? I didn’t mean to. I frantically scrambled through the streets, staying in the shadows. I felt like every window held eyes that burned into my soul. I returned to the hotel room and hid. I was scared to go outside, scared to face the world. I pressed myself into a corner hidden from any windows. Hours of panic passed, and passed, the scene replaying in my head over and over with no end in sight. My hands itched as I remembered the feeling of my magic. It made me sick to my stomach to think of what that magic was capable of.
I curled up in the corner and buried my head into my arms. Taking up as little space as possible as I listened to the noises beyond the walls. Every little sound seemed aimed at me and the crime I had committed. They all knew what I had done. They all were angry at me. They all wanted me to pay. The sound of running startled me. It got closer and closer. They were coming to get me. They were going to kill me! Then someone loud banged on my door. I started uncontrollably shaking and my heart thudded painfully.
Bea’s panicked voice called out for me “Lucian! Are you in here?” She sounded scared and distressed. I squeezed my eyes shut, not wanting to face her. She knew my crime. She was hurt by what I had done. “Lucian please! Something happened to Manius.” I froze. The name itself is enough to rattle me. I opened my mouth as she pleaded for a response, but I couldn’t say anything. The noise continued for what felt like hours. Then she stopped. Stopped knocking on my door, stopped calling out for me. We both hold our breath for one small moment.
Then her voice breaks the silence with a whisper, “please be alright”. Then I finally hear her walk away. I’m sorry Bea I mentally respond to her. The silence felt heavier after that.