Roles and Responsibilities
Your role in this process...
Most important is the fact that the decision about what you do after CIS is yours to make. Sometimes your wishes and hopes may seem to conflict with the opinions of others; when they do, our job is to help you work out those differences as satisfactorily as possible with the important people who play a role in helping you plan your future.
The parent role in this process...
While your parents have a great deal to say about your future plans, you are the one who will implement those plans, so you need to make decisions about your future with which you can happily live. Parents, however, do have a need and a right to know the rationale for the decisions you make during this process. They are passengers in the car that you're driving, and like any passengers, they deserve to know where you're going and how you plan to get there. Keep them informed. When necessary, your University Counsellor stands ready to act as a mediator between you and your parents.
The counsellor's role in this process...
It may seem that the words "college" and "university" pervade your life and conversations around school, and you may decide that going to college immediately after CIS is not the most suitable choice for you. Whatever decisions you make, we stand ready to help you untangle the options and prepare your application materials. Thus, you will find us assuming many roles during this process - advisor, counsellor, devil's advocate, editor, cheerleader, statistician, red-tape artist - however, we will not be the decision-maker. That's your job.
The role of classmates and friends...
Friends and classmates are undeniably irreplaceable components to a happy and fulfilling school life. But as in any relationship, there can be tension brought on by all sorts of factors. In the college process, it's not unusual to see relationships strained by competition including competition for grades and competition for college acceptances. Try to remember that competition is a poor substitute for mutual support and cooperation. If you don't like an environment that over focuses on grades and test results, engages in endless speculation on who's applying where and their chances of getting in, then you have the option of simply not contributing to that environment. Surround yourself with friends who understand that the college process is not about competition, but rather mutual support.
Confidentiality...
Another important issue is confidentiality - for you and your family. Conversations with your university counsellor will remain between us. Family information is always considered private. In some cases, if you convey information that we feel your parents need to know, we may advise you to share it with them after we work together on the best strategy to do so. Likewise, if your parents tell us something that they don't want to tell you but it affects your future, we will encourage them to tell you.
Sometimes the "confidentiality" policy may frustrate you. If you ask, "Who else applied to X university?" we will answer, "You know we won't tell you that." We respond that way in order to protect others' privacy, just as we will protect yours. However, if you bring us important confidential information that we feel requires an action, we will act upon it, while protecting the source as best we can. The role of the university counsellor is a complex one: we serve as "middle people" between our students (our primary concern) and the universities (our secondary concern).
The one exception to the confidentiality statement is if your counsellor is made aware of information that threatens a student's health or wellbeing. In those rare instances, your counsellor is required to break confidentiality.