Advice

Dear Cougar Catch Advice Column,

My friend has been bullying me for a while now. 

We've been friends for many years and I used to think it was just

teasing, but their words really hurt. They have been shaming me

for my insecurities - laughing at me every time I make a

mistake, telling me that I eat too much, and pointing out every

time my voice cracks like it all is some kind of joke. The worst part

is I feel that everything they're saying is true! Despite all of this, I

 really really like being their friend and they make me laugh! What

should I do?

-Not Funny

That is 110% not okay. It doesn't matter how long you have been friends or how funny they are, they are harming your mental health and self-worth. You should definitely report them to your counselor, not only for your well being, but for theirs as well. They probably feel really insecure and have a lot of sadness. Sadly, the most you can do is confront them and, if they don't stop, tell an adult. As for the hurtful words they threw at you, mistakes are a part of learning and growing, having a different body shape doesn't mean that you are overweight, and there are a lot of things that may seem strange and awkward that occur while you are growing, but remember that you're not the only one. If you are really concerned about any of these things, consult a doctor before jumping to conclusions. You are beautiful just the way you are. Thank you so much for sharing this.

One of my friends keeps stealing stuff from my backpack when we're walking and runs away/hides it.

-Where's My Stuff?

That sounds really frustrating. Do you think that your friend might think of this as a shared joke, like a way to bond with you? If so, maybe tell them how you feel when they steal your things, because that is not okay, whatever the case is. Set boundaries, and be careful not to be too harsh in your tone, but clear in your meaning. It might also benefit to spend some more quality time with them so that you two have more to connect over! It sounds like this friend may want to get to know you better! If you are absolutely certain that this person purposefully hurt your feelings for whatever reason, take note that oftentimes we assume the worst in people, and first try the method above (set boundaries.) If the issue persists, you might want to take some time away from each other, just to evaluate and come back to the situation with an open perspective! If none of this works, it would probably be best to share with a counselor.