Cravings to Connect

October 2025

I have been thinking a lot about connection lately, not in any one specific way but in the many forms it takes. I think about the people I have been connected to throughout my life, what keeps those bonds strong, and the ones that have quietly faded. How do we go from sharing our most intimate secrets with someone to becoming strangers? It almost does not make sense.

Or how do we go from feeling deeply connected to someone to feeling miles apart? Why do we do that as humans, beings wired for closeness, comfort, and safety in one another’s presence? I know people grow, change, and evolve, and maybe that means we cannot always do that with the same people. People grow in different directions.

And it is not just people. I have felt connected to places, animals, songs, even fleeting moments. Some connections pass through briefly, and others run so deep I cannot imagine my world without them. Sometimes I fight to keep those ties, loyal to them with everything I have. Other times, I recognize a connection that still exists but no longer feels good, and that is its own kind of ache.

This reflection is simply to acknowledge our craving for connection, and also our need at times to pause, reset, or expand it. You have permission to grow with your connections or to grow from them. Nobody else can determine that for you.

If You Are Feeling Disconnected Right Now

Disconnection can happen for so many reasons: grief, change, burnout, emotional overload, or even healing. It is not a sign that something is wrong with you; it is a signal that something inside is asking for attention. Here are a few gentle things to try:

🌿 Reconnect with yourself first.
Spend a few quiet minutes each day noticing what you need. Ask yourself, “What feels off?” and “What might I need more or less of right now?” Sometimes connection begins within.

🌿 Reach for small, safe connections.
You do not have to leap into deep conversation. Try small moments of warmth: a smile at the barista, a text to someone you trust, or eye contact with someone who feels safe. Small moments matter.

🌿 Engage your senses.
Ground yourself through sound, smell, or touch. Music, a warm drink, soft blankets, or time in nature can help you feel anchored in the present moment, which is often where connection quietly lives.

🌿 Create a ritual of meaning.
Light a candle for someone you miss. Revisit a place that once felt like home. Write a letter, even if you never send it. Rituals remind us that connection does not disappear; it simply changes form.

🌿 Let yourself outgrow.
If a relationship or space no longer fits, that does not mean it failed. Growth often asks us to loosen our grip so something new can bloom. Give yourself permission to evolve.

🌿 Practice compassion for yourself and others.
Everyone is carrying something unseen, including you. Kindness softens the edges of disconnection, even when repair is not possible.

Disconnection does not always mean loss. Sometimes it is an invitation to return home to yourself, to make space for new people, or to deepen the relationship you have with the world around you.

Wishing you calm,

Kristen 

Room for Rest

August 2025

August slipped away from me. Somewhere between the busy rhythms of summer, shifting routines, and simply being human, I didn’t get to sit down and write. At first, I felt that familiar tug of guilt, the voice that says “You should’ve kept up, you should’ve stayed on track.” 🌪️

But here’s what I’ve been reminding myself: sometimes the most healing thing we can do is step back, breathe, and let a pause be a pause. 🌿 Missing a month doesn’t erase the meaning of the ones before it, or the ones still to come.

Instead of seeing August as lost, I’m choosing to see it as an invitation, a reminder that rest and reflection don’t always follow a calendar. 🌙

A Practice for Gentle Rest ✨

The next time you feel behind or weighed down by expectations, try this simple reset:

1. Step outside, even for just a minute.

2. Notice the air on your skin. 🌬️

3. Find one thing in nature that catches your attention, whether it’s a tree, the sky, or the sound of birds. 🌳☁️🐦

4. Let yourself take it in fully before moving forward.

It doesn’t have to be big. Sometimes the smallest pauses bring the deepest calm. 💛

As we step into September, I’m carrying that softness with me. I hope you can too. If there’s something you’ve been meaning to do but didn’t get to, let yourself release the guilt. Trust that you can pick it back up when you’re ready. 🌼

Wishing you calm,
Kristen

Tired but Trying 

July 2025 

Have you ever felt like no matter how much you do, it still doesn’t feel like enough? You make sure your child gets time with friends, hoping they feel connected and included. You pull together decent meals in the middle of a nonstop schedule. You carve out moments of quality time, trying to ensure your child feels loved, supported, and truly seen. You say “yes” as often as you can, not wanting them to miss out on the experiences every child deserves.

I feel this pressure too. As a mom, I often catch myself bending bedtime phone rules just a little, because I know she's connecting with her friends, and I want her to feel included. I rearrange plans to help a hangout happen or say yes to something I hadn’t prepared for, all because I don’t want her to miss out. And while those choices come from love, they also come with a quiet cost to my energy and peace.

And still, there’s this quiet question underneath it all:

How are we supposed to carry it all without losing ourselves?

When the pressure to be everything to everyone never lets up… how do we keep it from consuming us?

Even when you’re doing all the things: meeting your child’s needs the best you can, you may still carry the weight of not being enough somewhere else.

Maybe it’s your relationship. Maybe it’s realizing that by the time you and your partner finally have a free moment, you're already spent, tired, touched out, and running on fumes. And if you're working? That’s another layer. The mental load of showing up in your career and as a “good mom” and present partner can feel nearly impossible to juggle.

A Practice to Begin: The "Bare Minimum Check-In"

When the pressure to do it all starts to consume you, and you're on the verge of losing yourself in the process, pause and ask:

“What would ‘enough’ look like today if I took the pressure off?”
“What’s the bare minimum I actually need to do to care for myself and those I love today?”

Then hold yourself to that: not the invisible, ever-growing checklist in your head.

This isn’t about doing less because you don’t care. It’s about doing enough because you do.

And the truth is: your worth is not measured by your productivity, your parenting performance, or how many hats you manage to wear without dropping one.

You are allowed to pause. You are allowed to reset the bar. You are allowed to be a whole person, not just a caretaker.

If this resonates, you’re not alone. This is exactly the kind of inner pressure we gently unpack in my Calm the Chaos therapy program for women.

Because doing it all isn’t the goal. Feeling more you again, that’s where we start. 

Wishing you calm,

-Kristen 

Permission to Pause 

June 2025

I created The Calm Corner as a space for all of us to connect over the emotional experiences we don’t always talk about, the ones we silently carry. The moments we feel we shouldn’t share, because as mothers, we’re expected to be strong, nurturing, energetic, and hardworking… almost all the time. There’s this quiet pressure to have it all together. I’m here to tell you, that’s a myth. That expectation isn’t truth. It’s conditioning. It’s rooted in societal and gender norms that say we’re only worthy if we’re constantly doing, giving, holding, or fixing. There have been nights when I’ve gone into my bathroom and sat on the floor in darkness, tears in my eyes, just trying to create a moment of silence and recollect myself. And you know what? That’s okay. I’m sure there are things you do for yourself too – to reduce the overwhelm, to reclaim a little calm, to make it to the next moment. We’ve all been there.

The real truth? You are human. With your own thoughts, feelings, and needs, regardless of how many hats you wear. And here, in this corner, you’re not expected to be anything other than yourself. Those social and gendered expectations? Leave them at the door. You have permission to pause. To just show up and breathe. Here, there will be no shame, no judgment, and no critiques. I will never ask you to shrink, hide, or pretend. I will offer compassion, just like I would want someone to do for me. We are all struggling with similar things as mothers. And it’s time we stop doing it silently and start finding connection again.

🌿 A Tip I Actively Try to Practice:

When you catch yourself thinking, “I should be doing more,” try this 3-step pause:

1. Name the pressure: “That’s my internalized ‘I have to hold it all together’ voice.”

2. Name your truth: “I’m allowed to be human, not heroic.”

3. Breathe slowly: Inhale for 4, exhale for 6. Let it land in your body.

✨ You don’t have to do everything to be enough. You already are.

If you need a reminder like this again next week, or next month, I hope you come back. This corner is always open.

Wishing you calm,

-Kristen