R: Put Yourself Out There

Of all the resolutions we’ve seen this semester, this is perhaps the timeliest. We believe that the end of dating is marriage. This does not have to mean that every interaction with the opposite sex has to be overinflated in its importance. Though, it should give us some pause. The question of what disposition we should adopt towards dating and relationships is at the center of this debate.

The affirmative will favor a proactive approach to dating. It is not enough to stumble upon love. Given how important love and romance are for those called to married life, those who seek to one day be married must be intentional about dating. They should be putting themselves out there by going on dates, meeting new people, and letting it be known that they are searching.

If someone has serious character deficiencies, of course he or she should work on those before looking for love. Instead of arguing that self-improvement is the prerequisite for putting oneself out there, the negative in this debate will prefer a more reactive approach to dating, even once one no longer has any glaring character flaws. Some say that you only find love when you stop looking for it. Along these lines, those in the negative believe that living a rich life focused on oneself will be most romantically beneficial in the long term.

How does grace figure into the search for love? Which approach helps you better know yourself? Are certain kinds of people more likely to put themselves out there? Do gender differences have a role to play here?