The first article selected is A Conversation with Yao Xian(Yao Xian Xian Hua Ji yao 瑤仙閒話記 ).  It is collected in the second half of Xu Yezhao's writing collection. The article presents an engaging discussion that begins with a casual conversation between the writer, Xu Yezhi, and her friend, Yao Xian. Their dialogue soon transitions to a thought-provoking exploration of an intriguing topic in their lives as married women: the practice of their husbands taking concubines. The conversation delves into the dynamics of family structures shaped by the inclusion of concubines, examining the relationships between family members and the conflicts that arise within these complex arrangements. With the intervention of the maid Xiao Jiao, who offers a compelling rebuttal, the conversation deepens further, touching upon the essence of marital relationships. Ultimately, the discussion uncovers the rarity and challenges of true happiness, leading to a more profound understanding of what constitutes a fulfilling life.

客瑶仙自遠方來，握手道故，相得甚歡。談論之餘偶及人生之樂事。客曰：閨門之樂惟納妾為子知之乎。 吾曰：知之。盖[1]謂朝夕相依，終身不離而又同甘共苦者。

爾[2]客曰：非此之謂也。益[3]納妾之家，其類有数等。有無子而納者，有子少家富而納者，此皆不藉乎才貌以為樂也。又有輕浮飄蕩之人，恃其才勢多實[4]，美妾復喜愠[5]不常，至爭競百端，其悔有不可勝言，亦何樂之有哉？

A guest named Yao Xian came from far away. She shook my hand, and we reminisced about old times, exchanging stories with great joy. We casually talked about the joys of life. The guest said, "The only pleasure in the household is taking concubines, did you know?" "I understand. (You) probably mean someone who stays by your side day and night, never leaves you, and shares all of life's ups and downs with you."

The guest said, "That's not what I meant. There are many types of families that take concubines." "There are those who take concubines because they have no children, and those who do so because they have few children but are wealthy. These people seek pleasure without considering talent or appearance." Some frivolous and drifting people, relying on their talents and status, possess great wealth and many beautiful concubines, often find themselves moody and capricious, leading to constant competition. When they regretfully fail to restrain themselves from speaking out, what joy is there in that?

言未罄，客随來之婢，名小嬌者率然應聲曰：妾美則形已之，惡[1]其夫必生憐新棄舊之心，何反足以為樂耶？客曰：是非爾所知也。夫苟[2]不賢不拘，何妾皆能奪嫡夫? 既賢矣，雖獲絕色無間[3]也。盖[4]夫婦敵[5]體[6]也譬諸水，夫為海則妻亦河矣，而妾則行[7]潦溝[8]瀆[9]也。

若美妾，則蓮池魚漾[10]也。曾[11]聞以河海之水較清，濁于蓮池魚漾乎?如必欲較之，而反求陋于己是自趨[12]于畢[13]下而不成為正嫡[14]也。

盖夫之貴即妻之貴也。夫之子即妻之子也。然則夫之美非已之美乎，夫之樂非已之樂乎？但此樂也知之者，鮮矣。得之者更鮮矣。

盖不得其境不可以為樂。得之而不遇其人，更不可以為樂。其不亦難哉？

Before the host could finish speaking, a maid named Xiao Jiao, who had accompanied the guest, immediately responded: “If I am beautiful and that beauty belongs to me, but it might cause my husband to develop a fondness for the new and abandon the old. How, then, can beauty be a source of happiness?” The guest(Yaoxian) said, “This is not something you can understand.” If a husband is neither virtuous nor faithful, then how could a concubine so easily win over the rightful wife’s husband? If the husband is truly virtuous, even encountering someone of unparalleled beauty would not create discord. The relationship between husband and wife is equal and can be compared to water. If the husband is the ocean, the wife is the river, while the concubine is merely the roadside puddle or a small ditch.

If she is a beautiful concubine, she is like a fish gliding gracefully in a lotus pond. Have you ever heard of comparing the water of rivers and seas to the water in a lotus pond where fish swim and finding the water in a lotus pond is clearer than the water of rivers and seas? If one insists on making comparisons but instead seeks to lower oneself, it is akin to willingly degrading oneself and failing to become the rightful wife. 

The husband’s honour is the wife’s honour, and the husband’s children are also the wife’s children. Then, is the husband’s excellence not also the wife’s excellence? And is the husband’s happiness not also the wife’s happiness? But few people understand this happiness, and even fewer truly experience it. 

Without the right circumstances, true happiness cannot be achieved; even with the right circumstances, without meeting the right person, happiness is still unattainable. Is this not truly difficult?

This article reflects on the true joys and sources of happiness in life through an exploration of the relationships between husband, wife, and concubines. It criticizes societal tendencies to value superficial beauty and fleeting vanity, emphasizing that character and inner cultivation are the foundations of family harmony and happiness. By using metaphors of the relationships among virtuous wives, beautiful concubines, and their husbands, the author advocates for equality and mutual respect between spouses. The article argues that true happiness requires the right environment, character, and emotional resonance, which are rarely understood or pursued. Implicitly criticizing the social trends of the time, it promotes a life that values character and inner qualities over external appearances.