Armie/Uxh

The black that fills the labyrinth of passages occupying the space between massive abandoned hangers and docking bays, storage warehouses and processing rooms, guest rooms and more, retreats at the clicks of automatic lighting responding to the movement of a strange figure. A spacesuit, meandering down each corridor, searching for something, one foot jerking in front of the other, moving more as a machine prompted by individual orders than an individual within itself. In its helmet writhes a black mass, chasing its retreating cousin. 

Armie roved down another indistinguishable hallway, each jerky movement propelling them towards the unpromised prospect of some explanation of where they were. The rhythmic steps of their effort synced with the clicking of light, illuminating another empty crossroads each time. There was no sign of release or escape from this maze, but they could be patient. They had been patient for a long time. 

A click interrupted their metronome. A light had turned on, it was the same sound as ever - but the hallway in front of Armie remained dark. Armie stopped. Another click rang out, echoing through the labyrinth. This one seemed different somehow; less dangerous. As Armie discussed this with themselves, they were proven wrong as the space in front of them disappeared, replaced by smoke and rubble. The air filled with a tremendous roar, and the ship itself seemed to groan. It seemed to wake up.

Slowly, slowly, the smoke gave way to form. A wide shape, like the UFOs written about by paranoid Russian executives. A globe followed, encasing two alien stalks, then a massive checkered shape. The shape continued to flow through the hole, till the corridor was taken up entirely by the two figures; one, a behemoth in green methodically inspecting the other, a world in a spacesuit. The lights, having been damaged by the explosion, flickered.

The eyestalks turned to the suit. The strange appendages surveyed the clouded figure in front of them, standing stock still, yet pulsing throughout their entire body, as if their muscles were rushing from one part of them to another. Plans upon plans raced through the alien’s mind, trying to find the best way to approach the situation. The astronaut suit stepped forward, and spoke.

•What are you•

The sounds came not as smooth vibrations but rough scratches, the words seeming to battle their way upstream through skittering resistance. At the same time, there was a much more muted sound noticed by the alien. A cacophony of miniscule signals rang out from the suit, growing louder as it grew closer. The cries of a civilization working in unison.

The behemoth did not move, then did not move some more. A strange scent filled the air, and suddenly, like the flick of a switch, the murmuring of the spacesuit instantly ceased, as did the pulsing. It received the scent like a call from an old friend, then responded in like form, releasing its own drift of pheromones.

You can sense like us. What are you?

I am a creature of the vacuum. I inhabit the stars and live off of the void. I am called Uxh. I have seen those in your suit, and they cannot sense to me. What are you? Why are you here?

The air swirled around the two in the hallway as the lights clicked off, no longer sensing the movement indicating life. The two strangers did not move still.

We are creatures of the earth. We inhabit the rock and live off of life. Books talk of armies - we are one of them. May we present a gift? We come in peace, and mean no harm. 

The lights clicked on and the suit reached inside of itself. It pulled out a brown plastic block, light and slightly malleable. 

Plastic explosives, ones named C4, from our home. 

…

How did you know?

We read all we find. It is not much. But this is a strange place, with strange workings. Suns turn on and off, following us. Trees are metal and dense. In this alien forest, we find something familiar: C4 explosives, detailed heavily in Russian. Then we find it again, felling these metal trees that so separated us. Must it be coincidence?

You are wise to think not. In my years, my friends, I have learned it rarely is. I will accept this exchange gladly. Is there anything I can do for you?

Teach us.

Very well. Come with me, friends. I journey to the core of this strange star, to alleviate me of my burden. I will teach you all I know along the way.

Burden? We could help.

Behind the globe, the stalks twisted and intertwined.

Not with this, friends. I am blessed to inhabit emptiness, but it means I cannot tolerate the soup most beings reside in. This ship has been told to grant wishes. Maybe it will grant mine.

The eyestalks separated, and the gigantic figure turned in the corridor, and slowly started moving away. The click of the lights rang out, then another. Both figures stopped moving. Another click, then another, as the corridor in front of them lit up. All at once, the lights turned off with a final click.

The walls of the corridor sprang outward with a triumphant burst of a trumpet! A glittering space opened up before the pair, leaving them in a large, well-lit room. Loud music filled the air, and mechanical cheers pierced the silence. Rows upon rows of robotic figures replaced the walls, hands waving in excitement, each equipped with one giant camera in the center of their chests and a painted face of happiness upon their visage. LEDs burst into action, outlining a silvery stage, upon which there sat two seats, one rustic and leather, the other a beanbag chair the size of a whale. As the music crescendoed, a beautiful desk popped up opposite the chairs, and out of that popped a chair that twisted and grew into a dashing metal figure, with a neat wire mullet.

HELLO, EVERYONE! WELCOME BACK TO THE MOST ENTERTAINING SHOW ON THE WIFE, MEET THE TRESPASSER! I’M YOUR HOST, WILEY T. W4TCH3R, HERE TO BRING YOU ANOTHER GREAT NIGHT! AND LET’S TAKE A MOMENT TO THANK OUR INCREDIBLY TALENTED BAND, B0B MECHLEY + THE WARDENS!

The pair of wanderers were beckoned onstage. Uxh looked around, motionless, taking in their surroundings, before slowly moving to occupy the beanbag chair. Armie stood where they had been. 

WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE SOME OF OUR CONTESTANTS ARE A BIT SHY! THAT’S ALRIGHT THOUGH, IT’S NEVER A SHOW WITHOUT A CHALLENGE! LET’S MEET OUR NEW FACELESS FACES! State your name and purpose, please.

All around the room, yellow lights flashed purple. The robotic onlookers stared holes into the two guests. Silence fell over the room, and everything was motionless. The scent filled the air once more.

Armie. Do exactly what I say. I do not trust this ship, and this thing that has built an arena around us certainly has no intention of letting us go unscathed. Tell it your name, and what you are here for, but do not move. 

State your name and purpose, or prepare to be expelled from the premises. 

•I am Armie, a wanderer. I come to discover knowledge about the world, and where I am.•

The purple glow dissipated as the onlookers regained their warm hue, ready to transform back from security system to excited audience. 

An excellent endeavor indeed! Sorry to say, though, our lovely ship currently isn’t open to visitors, although I can definitely direct you to the gift shop! But you never introduced your friend! State your name and purpose, or prepare to be expelled from the premises. This is your final warning.

Purple lights shined again, this time moving to form a spotlight directly onto Uxh. The spotlight started to shift its hue, growing more violent by the second as purple turned to red. 

•Wait. They cannot speak. I will speak for them. They are called Uxh. They are here to learn to breathe.•

The lights did not fade back to yellow, nor did they shift away from the large creature. 

Please confirm this information.

Uxh slowly raised their eyestalks, then nodded them yes. The lights flashed back to a cheery yellow once more, and the pair experienced a silent bout of relief. 

Learning to breathe? Oh, you’re in for a trip! Again, though, I can’t let you pass. We have some very strict opening and closing hours, and the Wizard is NOT seeing visitors - or anything at all, for that matter - right now! But I’ll cut you fine folks a deal. I’m going to give you exactly 25 seconds to leave this place, and then you will be terminated. Everyone, give it up for our newest contestants in Get. Out. Now.

Everywhere, lights turned red. Mechanical whirring filled the air and drowned out the jaunty big-band tune. The walls opened to reveal barrels and silos. The desk disappeared into the ground, replaced by a giant hourglass filled with sand that looked like a ground-up galaxy. White light poured out of a small doorway at the end of the room. Then stars began to fall.

Armie, run as fast as you can. Protect yourself.

•You will not reach the exit in time. You will die.•

Uxh, as slowly as when the two first met, reached into the folds of its garments and produced the block of C4 Armie had given them. 

I will be fine. Go.

The spacesuit filled with void started to sprint towards the doorway, in a zombie-like motion as an entire population strained against its own walls to escape. Uxh produced another block of C4, then a sticky green substance. They plastered it over the C4, then with a single fluid motion threw the contraption in the air. 

The device exploded, flinging greenish plastic against the walls, where it stuck. Armie reached the exit, then turned back and saw the last of the stars fall in the hourglass. The behemoth in the beanbag chair receded into themself, their globe protected by their hat. The door fell shut. All was still, and silent. Then a single gunshot rang out, and the world erupted.

The sticky explosives on the walls of the chamber looked like fireworks, imprinting beautiful splashes of color on the grey surfaces, illuminating the room with yellow one final time. The walls roared down, rubble rushing eagerly to the floor, fighting to create the biggest craters. The robotic host’s hair was covered with dust, then cleaved in half as a metal plate sheared through W4TCH3R’s body. In the middle of this chaos sat Uxh, collapsed, shielded from the explosives and debris. But a stronger scent than ever emanated forth through the bullet hole in the top of Uxh’s hat.

A spacesuit ran over to an alien in the middle of a collapsing room. It knelt by the top of the figure, and pressed its helmet against the figure’s wide brimmed hat, as if in mourning. A skittering echoed throughout the halls. The spacesuit began to go limp, then collapsed itself. Behind the glass, it was empty. 

Uxh awoke to a cacophony of sensorial shouting and chattering. They opened their eyes and all was black. The noises stopped, and an overwhelming sense of relief reached them.

•You are alive.•

I should not be. What happened?

•You were shot. Your helmet shattered. You breathed oxygen.•

But why am I still here? And.. how are you talking to me?

•We came back for you. We surround you now, breathing the air so that you might live again in void.•

The giant figure pushed itself upright, and removed its head from its jacket. In its shattered globe of a helmet, all was black, and the only sound in the room came from the ants inside, skittering around, working tirelessly to maintain the seal they created.

•You said you would teach us things. And you are like us. So we will not abandon you. And we will give you life until you can live on your own again.•

…

Thank you, friends.

The giant figure picked up the limp spacesuit, stowed it in their jacket, and began searching for a way to fix their helmet, accompanied the whole way by Armie, vigilantly creating the void Uxh needed. The pair traveled down another corridor, past the debris now, and listened as the click of the lights synchronized in sweet unity.