I prepared for EVERYONE to sing "In My Life" from the Beatles as a song to transition from the birthday party to the afterparty. The song was suggested by Julie B, one of our guests...and if you look at the lyrics below, it really captures the moment. Let me say a bit more...
I last threw a birthday party when I turned 50, eight years ago. Though there were people at my 50th that were there at my 58th, they represented the minority for many reasons. A few have passed since 2017, like my own mother. Others have moved away. Then there's the dynamic of evolving friendships because of deepening and more focused roots where I live and work. When I turned 50, I had only lived in SF for six years, now it's been 14 years; my roots are deeper both where I live and how I work.
When I turned 50, I rented a hall that held 300 people at JAnet Pomeroy Center, a rehab center for neurodiverse teens like my son. For this party, though 75 RSVP'd, the place typically only holds 70 for concert events there. So I had to prioritize who to invite. Most of hte people there, outside my family, were people who belong to current communities, and represented by one of the speakers.
So the "In My Life" song represents a moment in time, a moment right now to acknowlege the friendships in the room. That will change as the months roll by. The neurodiverse community is very sobering. It's not uncommon for the kids of aquitnaces acquantances to pass. At my party were at least two with cancer, one in remission, and one starting aggressive treatment. Transitions are inevitable. But we can celebrate the now, in the now. And I was joyed to celebrate with you.
Here are the lyrics:
There are places I'll remember
All my life, though some have changed.
Some forever, not for better;
Some have gone and some remain.
All these places had their moments
With lovers and friends I still can recall.
Some are dead and some are living,
In my life I've loved them all.
But of all these friends and lovers
There is no one compares with you.
And these mem'ries lose their meaning
When I think of love as something new.
Tho' I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before,
I know I'll often stop and think about them,
In my life I love you more.
Tho' I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before,
I know I'll often stop and think about them,
In my life I love you more.
I actually prepared to teach the song in three parts; I listened to a Youtube video on teh song's harmonies perhaps 20 times to learn the 3 parts, and I envisioned us singing it together. That did not happen!
But the lines that carry the most meaning are these:
All these places had their moments
With lovers and friends I still can recall.
Some are dead and some are living,
In my life I've loved them all.
My last big party was eight years ago, and it was quite different . I threw an art show, and had a hall-of-famer musician contribute a song. It's here if you want a window of that pre-pandemic past. But here I am now...and so glad we shared these moments together, my communities joined togehter...in my life.
Slideshow: I prepare one (and asked you to remind me to play it), and we ALL forgot. After this moment, it just won't be relevant anymore. So I'd better share it here.
Some highlights include my passion for my community...all of you! You'll also notice distinct passions and unique spaces, like recumbent bikes, my family, horses for neurodiverse kids like my son, music, and what's a good slideshow without a few high school pictures. You'll hear my son signing lights to our neighbors during the pandemic (that's what SF folks did at sunset early in the pandemic.) BTW, the last bike video is Lev my neighbor (at the party) riding my recumbent for the first time. And the VERY LAST clip is an impromptu I love my neighbors! Like Lev, they have nerve and heart!
BTW, most of the pictures of the speakers were stills from video that my friend Teodros took...so there are not "real" pictures. Please share any pictures you have with me.
FINALLY, somebody wrote in the AFTERPARTY song request list that they wanted me to sing "Bohemian Rhapsody!" Please reveal WHO YOU ARE! But I often like a good challenge. So here's my attempt at the song...this will either be a gift for you, or a curse.
I don't know how to create space to leave notes (if you know how, let me know). But love to hear any thoughts about this. Email me at shongsf@gmail.com. Thanks for joining me. Your presence was such a gift.
Peace and Love - Steve