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04.08.2024
I saw Mr C on 31st July. This was to see whether I needed scar revision surgery. He didn't seem at all keen; there are a couple of areas on my chest that I don't like. However, I am happy to follow his lead - if he doesn't think I need to have anything done, then I won't. He has said a couple of times that what I have is a good outcome. There is a risk of complications and infection and to be honest, the scars do look fine - just a couple of areas where it seems puckered. Mr C said that if I wanted it done, then he could do things. I'm going to see him again in January for my yearly follow up so can think about it then. I really don't like what I see in those two places but I may have to put up with it. I also left him with a thank you card - I'd been mulling over whether to give it to him but having listened to Dr Liz O'Riordan's book and how grateful she was to receive cards from patients, I gave it to him.
09.08.2024
On Wednesday, I had another tattoo done. This time, it was the Flat Friends UK ribbon along with the word Doris. The hands encircle the scar left from my PICC line. As you may or may not have read, my PICC was called Doris throughout treatment and I wanted some way of keeping that 'alive'. As I have a double mastectomy without reconstruction, Flat Friends means a lot so the ribbon isn't any generic pink cancer ribbon. It is in quite a tender place and so a little sore - nothing too bad though.
There was also a post in Instagram this morning talking about the use of the word cancer 'survivor'. I wrote a whole chapter about the words associated with cancer. This Instagram post had me thinking. I'm not keen on the term 'survivor'; I don't know why. Obviously, I am a survivor but it doesn't sit well with me. I don't know what word could be used instead or how I'd explain it. I'm sure as time passes I'll get used to the word.
12.08.2024
Met with Jo, The Titless Wonder, on the Folkestone Harbour Arm today. We spent a lovely couple of hours drinking coffee, going for a walk and just chatting. Such a lovely time.
14.08.2024
I made an Instagram reel today showing my hair growth from December. Here is the link: Hair growth reel on Instagram. My Doris tattoo has settled as well.
I also saw my physio yesterday. She has really taught me about what I need to do in order to keep my back moving and to try to relieve the pain in my thigh/hip area. As she was massaging my back, I was chatting away about how I'd lost weight and then got rid of the pain prior to my cancer diagnosis but now that pain was back (although improving from the beginning of this year). It was the first time I actually said the words "It's not fair!"
I haven't said that at all (maybe once at the very beginning) because it is the hand that you are dealt and you have to manage it. I think for me, it was more about the fact I'd worked hard to lose weight so that I could relieve the pain in my back. However, I hadn't been able to enjoy this as I'd had the cancer diagnosis and treatment made my whole body ache. I'm grateful that my physio has been so knowledgeable and really helped me learn how my body is working post-cancer. I'm trying my hardest to not use pain killers and am now doing stretches and have incorporated some pilates into my evening routine. My general movement is improving and the aches and pains are slowly reducing.
28.08.2024
Well, here we are nearly at the end of the summer holidays. They went very quickly. Last year was very different - I had two chemo delays which sent me into a spiral of anxiety. This year, there hasn't been enough time. I haven't actually done anything but I do feel rested, ready to get back to work and try not to be too disrupted.
Yesterday, I was part of an online workshop giving my views about AI technology. This was a Breast Cancer Now Voices opportunity. It was a very interesting conversation.
I also visited the physio a final time today about my back. Whilst there, I asked about whether a mastectomy scar can get stuck to the rib cage. Apparently it can. She suggested I speak to my CNS (Nessy) to see if there is anything specific they suggest as it is also a little 'keloid'. I rang the Cancer Care Line and am booked in for a phone call on Monday to see what they can suggest.
31.08.2024
I met up with some of the Flat Friends at Little Farthingloe Farm. It was a lovely couple of hours where we could just chat.
I've also got myself a ticket to go to a 'Cancer in Common' event. I'm very much looking forward to this as I will get to meet other people who have had or continue to have cancer. It's in London so the plan is to meet Jo and some other people on the train and then go to the venue. I'm also meeting someone who I have been chatting to on Instagram; she is going to have finished her chemo by then.
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